


And Make a Lost World Thy Home

by jesterlady



Series: Half a Stranger [4]
Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Veronica Mars (TV)
Genre: Alternate Season/Series 05, Alternate Universe, Apocalypse, Big Bang Challenge, Canon Dialogue, Canon Het Relationship, Character Death Fix, Community: het_bigbang, Crossover, Established Relationship, F/M, Getting Back Together, Magic, Magic-Users, Married Life, Multiple Crossovers, Multiple Pairings, POV Multiple, Post-Series, Prophetic Dreams, Psychic Abilities, Reunions, Rituals, Romance, Season/Series 05, Season/Series 07, Visions, Wordcount: 50.000-100.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-27
Updated: 2015-08-27
Packaged: 2018-04-17 11:29:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 58,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4664901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jesterlady/pseuds/jesterlady
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Veronica starts having dreams about Spike coming back from the dead, it means a new apocalypse for everyone</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own BTVS, ATS, or VM. Some lines are from the show. The title is by Andrew Reed.  
> A/N: Anyone who's ever seen Veronica Mars knows that even though the show does not expressly state anything supernatural is going on, the amount of visions/dreams Veronica has lends itself to that very nicely. When one has already written two stories crossing Veronica Mars with Buffy the Vampire Slayer, it lends itself even more nicely.
> 
> My artwork by Aurelia can be found [here](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/Het_Big_Little_Bang_Challenge_2015/works/4665432)

_She was back underneath Sunnydale High School in the Hellmouth._

_Veronica turned slowly, remembering. They had come there to defeat the First and Veronica had been on the perimeter. She and Logan had taken the west side of the school. Xander and Anya were on the east side, Giles and Dawn were on the north, and Tara and Mac had been on the south. Their job was to fight the vampires and Bringers who escaped to the perimeter._

_Veronica remembered Buffy and Spike walking away with Willow and Faith and a small army of Potentials to open the mouth of hell. She and Logan had taken their post, exchanging nervous quips and testing the various traps and weapons they’d brought with them. When the fight had come to them it had been quick and won largely through the clever employment of sunlight. Neither of them were any kind of match for the Turok-Han, but they’d dispatched as many Bringers as they could, getting bruises and cuts for their efforts. Logan had received a heavily bleeding head wound, but neither of them had been severely injured. When it was all over they had counted themselves fortunate to have escaped so lightly._

_As she watched it happen again, this time Veronica followed Buffy and the others, watching them drip blood in a circle and open the seal. Then she followed after them down into the darkness to the army of Turok-Han and the bottomless abyss._

_She’d heard many accounts of the battle itself from Buffy, from Faith, from all of the new Slayers. She’d always thought she knew what really happened. This time, she saw it for herself. It was incredible and the long arduous months of training began to pay off for the Potentials, augmented by the sudden rush of Slayer strength, stamina, and skill. Veronica remembered that feeling all too well and she couldn’t help but envy them a little as she watched their dance with death._

_The battle went on, one of the other Slayers bringing the Scythe back from Willow and tossing it to Buffy. They fought for a seemingly interminable amount of time until a bright flash lit up the underground from one corner and the ground began to rumble and shake. Buffy shouted Spike’s name and ran toward the light. Faith began ushering girls out of the Hellmouth. Veronica watched Spike and Buffy speak, but she couldn’t hear what was said. Buffy had never told anyone what his final moments were like, other than the fact that he was a hero, and the only reason the Hellmouth was no more was because of Spike._

_Buffy finally turned and began running, but Veronica stayed watching as Spike glowed brighter and brighter until finally even her dream-self needed to close her eyes._

_When she opened them again the Hellmouth was dark and dank, no signs of the battle that she had just witnessed. She walked slowly to the spot she had last seen Spike, expecting a pile of ash. Instead there was a glint of light and she knelt down, feeling for it. Her fingers touched something cold and she picked it up, the familiar sight of Spike’s amulet coming into view as she held it close to her face. She clasped it until suddenly its slight brightness began to grow and she dropped it, startled._

_A swirling cloud with embers of fire flying within began to form in front of her and before she could process what was happening, Spike’s form appeared out of the cloud, one hand upraised, and he screamed._


	2. Chapter 2

Veronica’s eyes shot open and she sat up quickly, heart racing. Logan shifted beside her, grumbling, before finally sitting up and putting a hand on her back.

“Were you attempting a late night seduction? Because honestly, Veronica, I’m getting too old for this.”

“I-I,” she said, “I had the weirdest dream.” 

“Veronica?” questioned Logan, his slightly teasing tone turning concerned.

“I’m okay,” she said, her mind working over-time.

“Were you dreaming about the freezer again?” he asked carefully.

“No,” she said, finally turning to face him.

“Then what?” he asked, turning on their bedside lamp.

“It was…about Spike,” she said, trying to keep her hands from trembling. The dream hadn’t been that terrifying. What was strange about it was how real it had felt. Ordinarily when she dreamed everything was fragmented and she could tell it didn’t make sense even while she was fully immersed. This time, she could smell the sulfur and feel the coldness of the amulet in her fingers. Spike’s scream had been so real. “In the Hellmouth.”

“I’m sorry,” Logan said, reaching to embrace her.

She went willingly, every day with him teaching her to accept the support he offered instead of trying to do everything on her own.

“It was so clear,” she said. “I could see him burning up, but then…then he came back.”

“Came back?” Logan asked.

“He came out of the amulet. It was like watching footage of someone exploding in reverse,” she said, trying to explain it.

“That’s quite the image,” he said.

She pulled back and smiled up at him, the sensations of her dream fading the longer they talked.

“Yeah, it was. I’m sorry I woke you.”

“It’s not like I don’t have a job I have to get up for,” he said. “Geez, one would have thought you would have timed your nightmares better.”

“Watch it, mister,” she said. “You’re not the one who pulled an all-nighter last night at the Camelot.”

“You know sometimes a guy has to wonder just why his wife spends all her time at that sordid den of iniquity,” he said, kissing her nose.

“Maybe I just want to remember our first kiss,” she said, waggling her ring finger in his face.

“Ah yes, the day you couldn’t keep your hands off me,” he said.

“Mine was a peck,” she said, demonstrating, “a peck. Yours was the full blown, make out helicopter shot kiss.”

“Helicopter shot?” he asked, raising his eyebrows.

“You know, in a movie, the camera would do a sweep around the kissing couple…” she trailed off.

“I guess you do spend a lot of time behind a camera,” he said thoughtfully. “Never thought you tried to do such artistic shots. Can’t imagine how they turn out, though.”

She swatted his shoulder, grateful for the distraction.

“Just go to sleep, Mr. I Probably Will Be Golfing With Other Millionaires Instead Of Actually Working.”

“We discuss work,” he protested. “I’ll have you know, my sweet, that it’s very difficult to golf and work at the same time, but I am an expert at it.”

“Then you shouldn’t be griping about not getting any sleep,” she said sweetly.

He gaped for a second before laughing and tugging her down beside him. He reached up to turn out the light and she snuggled into his shoulder and attempted to go back to sleep. 

Sleep was a long time coming. The images she’d dreamed of kept flashing through her mind and when she did dream again, it was to those same images, though never in the clear and chronological quality they’d had before.

***

In the morning Veronica felt grouchy and frustrated and snapped at Logan while he made her bacon and eggs.

“That really was a nightmare,” he commented. “I am sorry for it, my little grinch, but could you perhaps not bite my head off while I offer you breakfast?”

Veronica blinked and swallowed a retort before offering a weak smile and gulping some coffee.

“I am very sorry for my transgressions,” she said in a monotone. “But I can’t stop thinking about this dream.”

“How come, do you think?” he asked, sliding her plate over to her.

“It was so realistic, Logan,” she said, pushing the eggs around for a minute before actually sticking some in her mouth. “I just feel like it’s important. It’s one of my hunches.”

“Well, I usually believe very strongly in those myself,” he said, loading his fork with bacon.

“Even if it means I think something supernatural might be going on?” she asked.

He put the fork down.

“Please tell me you’re pulling my muscular and shapely leg.”

She scoffed and drank some more coffee.

“Didn’t you tell me once that since magic saved your life you had learned to appreciate its uses or something like that?”

“I am laden with gratitude over here,” he said. “But may I remind you that an entire town caved in and we lost a lot of good people because of the supernatural? Other than an occasional run in with a vampire and Mac teaching her weird classes, we haven’t had any interaction with the freaky-deaky magic for a long time.”

“You’re forgetting Tara’s coven,” she reminded him.

“How could I be so remiss,” he said sarcastically. “It’s not that I can’t see magic’s usefulness and good side, but when it rears its head in our lives, it usually means something bad is going to happen.”

“Can’t argue with that,” she said. “Still not my fault that it happens.”

“I wasn’t saying it was,” he said.

“Granted, but I can’t help feeling like this is important and I should tell Buffy about it.”

Logan immediately shook his head.

“No, you can’t do that to her.”

“If something is happening, shouldn’t the Slayer know about it?” Veronica argued.

“She’s not the only Slayer anymore,” Logan said. “Faith’s got that covered for the most part and Buffy’s trying to put the past behind her. It’s been five years since Spike died; don’t go digging into that wound.”

“You say that like I instigated this,” Veronica said sharply. “I didn’t dial The Dream-About-Spike hotline last night, you know.” He just chewed for a while, looking unhappy. “If it was about you, I’d want to know,” she said finally. “Even if it meant nothing; even if it was hard, I’d want to know.”

“Not everyone’s the same, Veronica,” Logan replied, his face softening despite his words.

“Believe me, I know. But I really feel like I should at least let her know. She can make the decision about what to do. I mean, I don’t even know what could be done. As much as I’ve learned, you’re right - we’ve gone normal the past couple of years.”

“We are not normal,” he said, swallowing the last of his coffee.

“Well…” she said, conceding his point. “Much more normal than we have been or could be.”

“Better,” he said, taking his plate over to the sink.

“So…I’m just gonna call her,” Veronica said.

“For the record I’m against it,” he said.

Veronica pretended to notate something on her napkin.

“Noted.”

“Are you done?” he asked, surreptitiously, she was sure, trying to check his watch.

“Go,” she said, laughing. “I’ll clean up. Golf waits for no man.”

“Oh, it will wait for me,” he said, crossing the room and bending down to kiss her. “You’re going to the drug store first thing, right?”

“Yes, I’m going,” said Veronica. “But I wouldn’t get my hopes up if I were you.”

“Impossible,” he said. “I love you.”

“Love you, too,” she said.

Veronica finished her breakfast and then reviewed the rest of her day. She had a client meeting later before she and Mac were getting lunch. There were some calls and leads she wanted to follow up on in the afternoon, but for now she could afford to clean the kitchen and call Buffy. She glanced at her watch and decided it was late enough in Cleveland, especially for a night owl.

The phone rang a few times before a muffled voice answered the phone.

“Buffy?” she asked.

“Hey, Veronica,” said the other voice, much clearer now.

“Sorry, I guess you decided to patrol last night, huh?”

“Yeah, well, retirement before twenty-five isn’t as fun as it sounds,” Buffy said wryly. “I ended up finding a nest which is pretty unusual these days, but it meant I had to actually work at it.”

“Sorry to wake you up,” Veronica apologized.

“It’s okay. I actually don’t need as much sleep as other people,” Buffy admitted.

“Remind me more of how much I hate you,” Veronica said.

Buffy laughed.

“Sorry, what can I do for you? Something tells me this isn’t a social call.”

“Well, no, in fact it’s a Logan-doesn’t-approve-of-this-call call.”

“That sounds serious. Something magick-y happening? You guys okay?”

“I had a dream last night,” Veronica said slowly. “It involves painful subjects and potentially interesting implications.”

Buffy paused before replying.

“Well, as a receiver of Slayer dreams, I’ve learned to listen to them. Tell me what’s the what.”

Veronica described her dream, each detail still amazingly clear in her memory, more because she could recall how it felt to be in it than because it was an actual memory.

Buffy listened without interrupting and then didn’t say anything for a long time.

“A lot to process, huh?” Veronica finally said when she didn’t feel like she could bear the silence any longer.

“More like…too much,” Buffy said, her voice a little hitched up.

“Sorry, that’s why Logan was so against calling you.”

“I’m almost inclined to agree with him, though don’t tell him I said so,” Buffy replied.

“Secrets aren’t usually safe with me, but this one is,” said Veronica. “What do you think?”

“If you were a Slayer I’d be all over it,” said Buffy. “But five years is coming up in a couple of weeks and it wasn’t traumatic only for me.”

“So nice of you to share,” said Veronica.

“I try,” said Buffy. “Anyway, I’ll give it some thought, maybe ask Giles. You should keep me updated.”

“I can do that,” Veronica said. “Are you sure you’re okay? Like you said, five years…coming up.”

“I won’t lie and say I’m peachy keen,” said Buffy, “which is a phrase I’ve never understood. Any insights?”

“None but that you’re deflecting my question,” Veronica said fondly.

“You should be a PI or something,” said Buffy.

“I’ll take it under advisement,” Veronica said, patiently waiting.

“I’ve…moved on,” said Buffy finally, as if sensing Veronica wasn’t going to let it go. “Pretty much wholly, but this time of year, I don’t do so well on that.”

“I’m sorry,” said Veronica. “You know we’d do anything if we could.”

“Oh, I know,” said Buffy. “Dawnie’s already going to come here after her finals are over and spoil me rotten, she says. I think that’s sister speak for I’m going to have to spoil her rotten, but I can always hope.”

“Good, I’m glad you won’t be alone,” said Veronica.

“Naw, Dawn will be with me. Willow and Xander said they’d Skype with me later and everything. Tara’s been bombarding me with her usual assortment of care packages and letters.”

“The woman is a saint,” said Veronica.

“Which is weird since she’s a witch,” said Buffy.

“I know, right?”

“So, don’t worry about me, okay?” Buffy said.

“Oh, we’ll always worry,” said Veronica.

“Sounds good to me. Say hi to Logan for me and tell him I’m pulling for a girl,” Buffy said.

“We just decided to start trying, let’s not beat the man down just yet,” said Veronica.

“Spoilsport,” said Buffy.

“Any child coming from Logan and I is going to be screwed right from the start,” said Veronica.

“Hey now, don’t go beating them down just yet,” said Buffy.

“I’ll try. It’s hard to visualize anyway. I certainly never thought I’d ever had kids,” Veronica admitted.

“You and Logan will make good parents,” said Buffy.

“I certainly hope so,” said Veronica. “At least they’re going to get one good grandparent out of the deal.”

“And a plethora of aunts and uncles,” said Buffy.

“Yes. Good word choice.”

“Yeah, I got one of those word a day calendars.”

“I can’t tell if you’re being serious right now,” said Veronica.

“I’ll keep the secret to my actual grave,” said Buffy. “The last one, not any potential next ones.”

“Fine,” said Veronica. “As it is, I should run because I’ve got to pick up a pregnancy test before my first meeting of the day.”

“Let me know how it goes!” Buffy said.

“You’re fairly high up on the list,” said Veronica.

“And thank you for calling,” said Buffy. “I mean it, it’s not something I wanted to hear, but…it’s Spike.”

“That’s what I’ll tell Logan when I roll out the ‘I told you so’ speech,” Veronica said somewhat smugly.

“Have fun.”

“Talk to you later.”

“Bye,” said Buffy and hung up.

Veronica quickly cleaned up the kitchen and left for the day. The strange restlessness that had plagued her since the night before was assuaged now that she’d called Buffy and she sincerely hoped that was the end of the matter.

***

_Buffy climbed out of the mausoleum, Spike right behind her. Caleb’s blood, or what passed for it, was still splattered on her jeans and she was already lamenting the loss of one of the only pair she owned that was perfect for slaying._

_Spike’s arms snaked around her from behind._

_“That was…perfection, love,” he said._

_“You’re just saying that,” she said. “But, yeah, it kind of was.”_

_“Put it right to that wanker.”_

_“I have never wanted to slay anything that badly,” Buffy said with satisfaction._

_“Not even me?”_

_“Sometimes you have that effect,” she said, turning to face him._

_He put one hand on a rapidly forming bruise on her chin._

_“You all right?” he asked._

_“Fine, you?” she asked, looking him over again._

_“Be right as rain in no time. The cut’s already healing.”_

_“Make sure you drink some blood when we get home,” she said._

_“I’ve been pillaging the world for over a century, Slayer, I know how to take care of myself.”_

_“Then why am I always cleaning up after you?” she asked._

_“Because I have you well trained,” he said._

_“In your dreams, Spike.”_

_“Every night, love, every night.”_

_“You’re such a pig,” she said._

_“And you love me,” he said, still saying it as if it was a brand new thing even though it had been a year since the first time she’d told him._

_“I think I’m going to be sick,” said a new voice out of the shadows._

_“Nothing new for you then,” said Spike, turning to face Angel._

_“Angel,” said Buffy. “I see you got my message.”_

_“Yeah, we just finished our own little crisis, so I was free to come up. I went to the Powers to see what they knew about the First,” Angel said._

_“And?” asked Spike._

_“And,” Angel said, physically ignoring Spike, “they thought this was something actually worth getting worked up over.”_

_“That makes me feel better and worse,” said Buffy._

_“What’d they say?” asked Spike, obviously annoyed at being ignored._

_“After I told them about my experience with it,” Angel said, “they said that they had something that could help.”_

_“What?” asked Buffy._

_“This,” said Angel, pulling a hand out of his pocket and showcasing an amulet with a large diamond._

_“Someone call Elizabeth Taylor and let her know she’s been robbed,” said Buffy, whistling._

_“What does it do?” asked Spike, eying it with suspicion._

_“All the Powers would say was that it was meant to be worn by a Champion, someone other than human,” Angel replied._

_“How perfect for you,” said Spike sardonically. “Get to swoop to the rescue again.”_

_“Hold on,” said Buffy. “So, you just wear it and then what?”_

_“I don’t know,” said Angel. “But I’m prepared to do whatever you need me to do.”_

_Buffy softened; there would always be something inside her that was grateful to Angel on some level._

_“I already have a Champion,” she said quietly to lessen the blow._

_Spike relaxed at her side, still so insecure after all this time, and she knew at least part of that was her fault._

_“Hate to break it to you,” said Angel, scowling, “but your ‘Champion’ doesn’t have a soul.”_

_“Because it’s done wonders for your personality,” muttered Spike._

_“He fits the bill,” said Buffy firmly._

_“Then he’s going to have to accept a shiny new soul along with the amulet,” said Angel darkly._

_Spike and Buffy looked at each other._

_“What do you mean?” asked Buffy._

_“I thought you’d go this route,” said Angel. “I asked the Powers if a un-souled vampire could bear the amulet and they said no. The amulet is designed for something with a soul and it will make sure that whoever is wearing it has one. The minute he sticks that thing over his head, his soul will be called._

***

Buffy tried to ignore it, she really did. She tried going back to sleep, she tried emailing Willow - she even tried cleaning up the house a little. She shared it with several other Slayers she was technically in charge of. Under the new Watcher’s Council, Slayers who had been fully trained were sent to work under a more senior Slayer for a while just to have a safety net before they were assigned a more permanent location or moved on to do whatever they wanted with their lives. Buffy had two at the moment and both of them were slobs, one because she was an actual slob and the other because she lived and breathed being a Slayer. Usually Buffy just lived with it, not being particularly anal about meticulous housekeeping at the best of times, but today she needed something to distract her.

Except it didn’t work and when she realized she’d been standing drying the same plate for five minutes while she recalled the events leading up to the final battle and Angel bringing them the amulet, she gave in and called Giles.

“Buffy, are you all right?” he asked, answering the phone after several rings.

She winced and realized she had done what Veronica had done to her, except Veronica had probably actually considered the time and had technically called during acceptable calling hours.

“I’m sorry, I can call you back. It’s not urgent,” Buffy said, suddenly wanting to back pedal.

“You sound troubled,” Giles said and she could hear him sitting up.

“I’m not, I am. I’m all over the place actually,” she admitted.

“What is it?” he asked.

“Well, I just got a call from Veronica and she had a very vivid dream about Spike.” Buffy described it to him. “I mean, it sounds like a Slayer dream, but Veronica’s not a Slayer. I just don’t know if it means something. I don’t want to open that door again; I don’t think I can.”

“Well, that is rather difficult,” said Giles. “It does sound very particular, like a vision of some kind. I wonder…” he said and Buffy imagined him flipping through some book he probably just kept on his night side table. “Well, it’s been documented in the past where women who were never identified as potential Slayers described similar type dreams that ended up being…well, true.”

“Great, crush all my hopes and dreams, Giles.”

“That’s not to say Veronica’s had a Slayer dream,” he assured her. “It’s too early to say whether or not that’s what’s happening here. It was just the one dream.”

“Yes, and vivid enough she called to tell me about it the morning after,” Buffy pointed out.

“Well, there is that,” he agreed.

“Okay, so what do I do?” Buffy asked, happy to put this one off on the Watcher, even if he was actually head of the Watcher’s Council and Dean of the Watcher’s Academy and so many other bigger and more important things than just her Watcher.

“I would advise patience and caution,” he said. “I wouldn’t like to ignore anything important, but it’s not that much to go on.”

“That’s what I told Veronica,” said Buffy, relieved her initial reaction was being validated.

“Well, then I could have been saved some sleep, couldn’t I?” Giles rebuked mildly.

“Rub it in,” she said. “Next time I’ll call even earlier. Or is it later? Not really sure how that works, come to think of it.”

“You know that I’m always happy to hear from you,” he said. “In other respects, how are you doing?”

“I’m fine, I’m dealing,” said Buffy. “Dawn will be here in a few weeks after her finals and I won’t be alone.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” said Giles. “I know Willow was rather excited about face to face time with you and Xander.”

“It’s been a while,” said Buffy. “Since Xander had Jesse, he and Anya are in total parent-mode.”

“Yes, a rather cute infant, I will admit,” said Giles. “I’m not very good around children.”

“Oh, that was so British and stuffy I want to cry from nostalgia,” said Buffy. “Go back to sleep before you break something.”

“I will, but if there are any new developments…”

“I’ll let you know,” Buffy assured him.

“Have a good day, Buffy.”

“Sleep tight,” Buffy said.

Buffy hung up the phone and went back to her email to Willow, updating it to let her know what Veronica said, but with none of the urgency she had previously been feeling. She pushed aside the feelings of longing she usually felt when she thought about Spike. He was gone and that was that. It wasn’t that she couldn’t think about him or talk about him or miss him, but if she did nothing but wallow in his memory she would be dishonoring his sacrifice and she refused to do that.

***

_The Hellmouth was in a frenzy around her, vampires being dusted left and right. Girls cried out and bodies fell. The light from Spike shot through the entire cavern, and the vampires were decimated with nowhere to hide from the cleansing glow that surrounded him._

_Veronica had to avert her eyes again and once more the Hellmouth was deserted when she opened them. She expected to find the amulet this time when she saw the glint of light. It felt exactly as it had last time, but she was prepared for the dark cloud that swarmed out of it and studied it intently._

_Spike was suddenly there, his body reformed and he screamed. She reached out for him and he doubled over, his whole body shaking._

_“Spike,” she whispered._

_He looked up at her and she saw the confusion in his eyes. He vamped out and snarled at her. She took a step back and he stayed where he was as if he couldn’t move. He kept on shaking, disoriented, his body seemingly in pain._

_She watched him, frozen, until something caught her peripheral vision and she turned to see Buffy looking horrified._

Veronica opened her eyes and exhaled heavily from her nose. She wasn’t frightened or scared, but she was overwhelmed with a very bad feeling. She turned her head to see if Logan was still asleep but his side of the bed was empty and she could hear the water running in the bathroom. She glanced at the clock; it was 5:56, just before her alarm was due to go off.

She lay back in bed, her eyes closed. When Logan came back in, she didn’t open them; just spoke into the darkness behind her closed eyelids.

“I think we’re in serious trouble.”


	3. Chapter 3

Logan gingerly set some coffee down on the bedside table next to Veronica. She took a hold of it, but didn’t drink from it.

He was worried. He’d only seen her like this a couple of times, and it had never ended well. Veronica wasn’t the kind of person who let tragedy mow her down; she got up and kicked the hell out of it.

“What do you think is going on?” he asked into the silence.

“Spike is alive,” she said. “Or is going to be. Or something.”

“That’s very crazy,” he pointed out.

“Thanks for the headline,” she said, rolling her eyes at him.

“Sorry,” he said. “Just a little tense.”

“You’re tense?” she said.

“Yes, I’m allowed to be tense when something is happening to you.”

“Granted, but I’m allowed to be more tense.”

“Granted,” he conceded.

Veronica rolled her shoulders and got off of the bed.

“Well, I have to tell Buffy like I said I would and then I’m going to get some answers about what is going on.”

“How are you going to do that?” he asked.

“Well, I’m going to ask Tara to do a reading on me and I’m going to enlist Mac to run some kind of search algorithm. I’ll trust Buffy to have Giles do the old book hunting.”

“What are you hoping to find?” he asked, already knowing what he’d prefer.

“Logan, I hope that nothing happens,” she said. “I mean, Spike was one of the best things that happened to either of us, but if he’s alive then all sorts of crazy stuff could happen and I certainly don’t want to be the one who sees it all coming in my head.”

“It would certainly frighten me,” he said, smirking slightly to hide the seriousness of his statement.

“What I want,” Veronica said, “is to go to work and help my dad and then come home to you and have a baby in the near future. I’ve paid my dues in the magic business. I’ve been body-swapped, nearly killed by a meteor, mesmerized by a Higher Being from another dimension, and fought in an actual battle with vampires. Very much things that aren’t normal for a teenaged private eye.”

“Except you’re not so teenaged anymore,” he pointed out.

“It just sounds more like a title if you’re a teenager,” she said, “like it’s something different than just having a job.”

“Well, with you it is,” he said. “I can’t count the number of times you’ve saved my ass.”

“I’ve counted,” she said.

“I’ll bet you have,” he said, chuckling, and kissed her forehead. 

He had a sense of foreboding but her desire to nip this in the bud was reassuring. They had enough supernatural friends without becoming supernatural themselves. For something like this to happen just before they attempted to have a baby would be just too cruel on behalf of the universe.

It had been a very long time before they had decided they were ready. Both of them had to come to terms with their own imperfect parenting and how ill-equipped they would be to raise a child. Logan was actually petrified at the idea, but he also found he wanted it more than anything else these days. What he wanted was a chance to show love and compassion in a way he had never known when he was a child. It would be a form of redemption and healing - at least he hoped it would be. Anything would do so long as they ended up with a child who was healthy and happy.

Veronica, he knew, had the same reservations about being a good parent, but whereas he wanted to be able to prove he could be one, she wanted a chance to see something completely unspoiled by the cynicism she had experienced her whole life. He just hoped they wouldn’t taint the child any more than most good parents would.

In the meantime, now that they had finally made their decisions, he was afraid if anything got in the way of it, one or both of them would freak out and change their minds.

He couldn’t help but look over at the unused pregnancy test sitting innocuously on the bathroom counter, just in sight from the bedroom. She’d gotten home so late she hadn’t taken it and they’d wanted to do it together.

“I can’t,” she whispered, following his line of sight. “Not right now. Just let me figure out what’s going on and then we’ll come back to us, okay?”

“Just don’t forget to come back,” he said, trying to sound like he was joking, but he couldn’t help sounding somewhat desperate.

“Do I have to repeat the epic speech to you again?” she said. “It’s totally unfair that you’re the one who said it and you were so drunk the only reason you know about it is because I’ve drilled it into your head.”

“You know I’m supernaturally eloquent when I’m drunk,” he said. “But the blackout potential is the tradeoff.”

“I made a decision when Warren shot you,” she said, “that it was going to be you and me forever. I’ll never back down on that, never. I can’t.”

“Well, I was a bit confused at the wedding, but now I think I finally get it,” he said.

“I hope you do,” she said, shoving him, then got up, a clear indicator she was done wallowing/being tender. “I’ve got to call Buffy.”

“What are you going to tell her?” he asked, resigned.

“That she should fly out here and go to the Hellmouth with me to see if Spike, or at least the amulet, is there.”

“What?” he said, putting his hand up. “Okay, two dreams isn’t quite drastic enough for a cross-country flight.”

“You didn’t feel it,” said Veronica, her face furrowed. “Spike was in so much pain, Logan. He was the most tangible thing I’d ever felt. He was there.”

“Okay, you’re Veronica Mars,” he said. “Hardboiled and cynical and you don’t believe anything unless you can quantify it with a paper trail and eyewitness accounts.”

“So now I’m going to quantify it with paper trails and eyewitness accounts,” she said, glaring at him. “I’m not following this blindly, Logan. I may be a private investigator, but I’ve also been the victim of a body-swap spell. Okay, nothing’s out of bounds.”

“If you really want to go and see for yourself, why are you dragging Buffy into it?” he said, rubbing his eyes tiredly. “We could just go ourselves.”

“She’s a part of this now. She was in the dream. She’s the Slayer. She and Spike were lovers. How could I not drag her into it?”

Logan put his hands on his hips and turned to look out the window, thinking. He could hear Veronica dressing behind him.

Veronica would do this with or without him. Frankly, the idea of going back into Sunnydale scared the hell out of him. He still had nightmares of being buried under the rubble, Turok-Han clawing at him or Bringers lurking above him. Yet Veronica was clearly experiencing something, he had to admit that. Logan had never been one to back down, and he certainly would never send Veronica anywhere without protection.

“I guess Slayer back up would be good for when it all goes horribly wrong,” he said, turning around.

Veronica smiled at him.

“I love you,” she said.

“Sure, sure,” he said, crossing over to her and leaning down to kiss her. “I’ll be at work, arranging for a lot of time off.”

“Liar,” she said. “You’ll be at the golf course complaining about how you won’t even have the excuse of going into work because the old ball and chain demands your help.”

“One day you will walk a mile in my shoes,” he said.

“They’re too big, I’d trip on the last hole,” she said, winking at him before heading into the bathroom.

Logan shook his head and headed to grab his things, trying to ignore how much he was dreading the next few days.

***

Veronica waited until Logan had left before finally looking herself in the eyes in the mirror and letting her fear show. It wasn’t that she couldn’t show fear in front of him or be honest with him, but at the moment she was so confused she didn’t know what to think.

This dream had been even more surreal than the last one and this time she’d felt Spike’s pain so vividly it was like she herself had just come back to life. Whatever was going on, she needed answers. Spike coming back to life in a new supernatural mess wasn’t that far-fetched an idea. Buffy had come back to life only two years ago herself and that had been her second death. No, as hard as it would be and as much as she didn’t want to deal with whatever would entail, what was scaring Veronica now was that all of this was happening in her head.

She could handle magic and demons and so much more, but not inside her own body. Even when she and Buffy had switched bodies, that hadn’t been something fundamentally changing her as she was, just where she was. She was nervous enough about getting pregnant, let alone having a demon mess with her head or whatever was going on.

She took several deep breaths and let the fear come and then let it drain back out. She would handle this the way she handled everything else. She wanted a different opinion than just Logan’s. As intelligent as she knew him to be, he remained as purposefully ignorant of the supernatural as he could. Veronica picked up the phone and called Tara.

Tara answered the phone cheerfully and Veronica felt better just hearing her voice. The woman had an incredibly soothing presence.

“You sound worried,” Tara said.

“Well, I’ve got one huge mess of a story to tell you,” said Veronica. “I need you to help me figure out what’s going on.”

“I’ll do my best,” Tara promised.

Veronica spilled it all, every detail she could recall and what her plans were and what she was worried about.

“Please tell me what’s happening,” she said. “You are the all-knowing witch and I’m just the woman who knows how to get the money shot.”

“All-knowing might be stretching it a little far,” said Tara wryly.

“Only slightly, so any ideas?” Veronica asked hopefully.

“First instinct? This is pre-cognition. You’re seeing the future, or a presentation of a possible future.”

Veronica’s heart sank. She hadn’t really thought Tara would just tell her to lay off the heavy food before bedtime, but she’d been hoping for something a little less psychic.

“What do you think it means? Will it keep happening?”

“I don’t know,” said Tara. “I’m sorry, but there’s not much I can tell over the phone.”

“Then you want to meet up like in five seconds?” Veronica asked.

Tara laughed slightly.

“Teleportation spells are a little bit more taxing than that.”

“I know,” Veronica grumbled. “Seriously, though, I need to figure this out. The idea that something else is in my head…it scares the life out of me.”

“There are different types of pre-cognition,” said Tara. “Slayer dreams are common for the Slayer; they come from the source of her power. Some people have visions sent to them from an outside source like Cordelia, the one who works for Angel? Some people are kind of just born psychic…like Spike’s ex, Drusilla.”

“Right, so what do I have?” asked Veronica. 

“I’ll be able to tell better in person and with some research, but I think you just have the sight. For some reason, it’s manifesting itself in dreams.”

“But why now?”

“Has anything like this ever happened before?” Tara asked. “Have you dreamt about things before they happened or knew something because of a dream or seen something happen?”

Veronica resolutely did not think about Lilly. She wasn’t willing to think about that just now.

“Maybe…in high school I had some dreams about the kids who died in the bus crash.”

“Was that before or after you traded bodies with Buffy?” asked Tara.

“After.”

“Well, possibly you carried something back with you from her body of the ability to have a Slayer dream.” Tara sighed.

“I don’t want it, how do I turn it off?” said Veronica.

“I-I don’t think you can,” said Tara.

“Tara, no.”

“I’m sorry, Veronica. Listen, I have a class in a few minutes, but why don’t I come over after and I’ll do whatever I can to verify any of these theories?”

“Sure, you can come for dinner,” said Veronica. “Logan will be thrilled.”

“He’s not so thrilled about the rest of it, is he?” Tara guessed.

“Can you blame him? I mean, we’re planning on having a baby and suddenly the mommy-to-be starts getting loony in the head, picturing vampires coming back to life.”

“Well, it is a lot to take in, but just make sure you guys keep talking, okay?” Tara advised.

“Yes, Mother Tara.”

“I’ll call you when I’m on my way,” said Tara.

“Thanks. I’m going to call Buffy now. Wish me luck.”

“Tell her if she needs anything, to let me know,” said Tara.

“I will, thank you, Tara. I feel a lot better knowing you’re on the job,” said Veronica sincerely.

“That’s nice to hear,” said Tara.

“Bye.”

Veronica hung up the phone and again calculated the time difference to Cleveland. She put off calling for a bit, making calls to clients and getting things ready for the night. She called her dad and asked him to take over her clients for a while, citing not feeling well. She was not going to get him involved in this until she knew much more. He misinterpreted her secrecy and jumped to the conclusion she was already pregnant and she didn’t disabuse him of the notion though she refused to confirm it either.

She felt guilty enough about not taking the test as it was.

When she’d cleared her life of possible complications and couldn’t think of anything to stall with any longer, she picked up the phone and called Buffy.

***

Buffy stepped back, studying her opponent’s chest. Nadia’s left side was telegraphing her next move too clearly. A vampire would have no problem taking advantage of that fact and neither would Buffy if it meant saving Nadia’s life some night in a cemetery or back alley.

Buffy lunged forward, twisting past Nadia’s strike, and slammed her right fist into Nadia’s shoulder blade, then jerked the girl back and to the floor.

“You do it again!” Nadia said, glaring.

“No, you did it again,” said Buffy. “Any vamp will take total advantage of your not so subtle movements.”

“Fine,” said Nadia, rubbing her shoulder. “I know this now. Again.”

Buffy had to admire the woman’s tenacity. She never quit and she always learned from her mistakes. Buffy wished she’d been able to do that when she was just starting out.

“You got it,” she said, readying her stance.

“Buffy, phone!” called Paige from upstairs.

“Who is it?” Buffy asked, her mind, which had been entirely focused and free from worry, suddenly racing with possibilities.

“Don’t know. One of your weird friends.”

Buffy huffed a sigh and grabbed a towel from the railing before heading upstairs, Nadia already turning her attention to the punching bag in the corner.

Buffy rubbed at her neck and got a bottle of water from the fridge before taking the phone out on the porch. She wasn’t super close with the Slayers she lived with. Paige had only been there for a few slightly disastrous weeks and Nadia was often content to keep to herself. Buffy knew that she could do more to get to know them, but they would only be there for six months, tops. Buffy didn’t see the need to worry them about potential resurrections that weren’t even in their jurisdiction.

“Hello,” she said. “Buffy’s Gym.”

“Sorry to break in on the workout,” Veronica said in to her ear.

“Well, I can’t say I’m exactly ecstatic to receive your call,” Buffy replied, her every sense suddenly on alert. “No offense.”

“None taken. I had another dream,” Veronica confirmed.

“Great,” said Buffy, heart sinking and rising simultaneously.

“It was the same as before except longer. You were there in the cavern with me when he came back.”

“Now I’m directly involved, that’s wonderful,” said Buffy.

“I’m really sorry, Buffy.”

“No, no, it’s not your fault, I’m just panicking a little over here.”

“Can’t be panicking worse than I am. This is happening in my head,” Veronica pointed out.

“Yeah, I know.” Buffy leaned against a porch railing and tried to think. “I just need a second.”

“I talked to Tara,” Veronica offered.

“Ooh, Tara’s good,” Buffy said, grasping on to that.

“Yes, she thinks I might have contracted Slayer Dream-itis from you when I came back from your body.”

“Maybe,” said Buffy. “That’s really weird though. Am I going to have to contact everyone I’ve switched bodies with about this?”

Veronica laughed a little.

“Well, since I’m the only one who didn’t already have the ability to have Slayer dreams, I think you’re good. Unless there’s something you’re not telling me.”

“No, pretty sure there are no secrets left,” Buffy said wryly.

“Besides, that might not be it. Tara’s going to come and check me out later. Either way, we think I have some sort of pre-cognition thing going on. That means…well, that means…”

“Spike’s coming back,” Buffy finished tightly.

“I think we need to go there,” said Veronica. “You were in the dream with me. You need to come out here and we have to go into the Hellmouth. I can’t explain it, but I know that needs to happen.”

“Compulsion is a powerful thing,” said Buffy, feeling the beginnings of a headache. “On the other hand, self-fulfilled prophecy is a great way to get yourself killed. It could be what someone’s counting on.”

“You’re right, of course,” said Veronica. “Which is why I want to keep on trying to figure out exactly what is happening to me, because I’m freaking out a little. On the other hand, I still think it’s something we need to do.”

“You could have a spell on you,” said Buffy. 

“Yes, a very powerful one,” Veronica agreed. “But in the meantime, I’d feel really good if the Slayer were here to back me up and we could go check out the cavern at a moment’s notice if need be.”

“Well, it’s a little drive,” said Buffy, attempting something like humor.

“Far shorter than from Cleveland,” said Veronica. “I don’t want to guilt you into this, honestly, but…he was in so much pain, Buffy. What if he’s already down there alone and can’t move?”

“What if it’s not really him?” Buffy asked in a small voice, fully feeling the import of Veronica’s words.

“It was Spike,” said Veronica. “I felt it was him.”

“You don’t feel things, you prove them,” said Buffy.

“Doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings,” said Veronica. “Come here and prove me wrong; I’m begging you to prove me wrong.”

“It better be him,” said Buffy. “I can’t see Spike and have it not be Spike. Oh, I can’t…” she swallowed her words, not even knowing how to articulate what she meant.

“I know,” said Veronica. “Buffy, I am so sorry I’m doing this to you.”

“I know,” said Buffy. “Okay, you convinced me. I’m coming. I’ll get a flight and text you the details.”

Veronica sighed with relief and Buffy could almost see the weight of all the decisions coming off of her shoulders and walking the length of the country to settle into old, familiar, and painful quarters on top of her own. It felt good in a way, but Buffy didn’t want to be responsible for the world by herself anymore. It turned her hard and she didn’t like that. She’d had relief, her only pain grief, for the last five years. She’d take that normal pain, shared by millions of people in the world, over the abnormal pain of world saving any day.

“Thank you,” said Veronica. “It will be good to see you, circumstances notwithstanding.”

“You too,” said Buffy. “Let me know what Tara says.”

“Will do. Have a safe flight.”

“Thank you,” said Buffy.

Buffy hung up the phone and sagged down on to the porch swing for a minute. She put her head in her hands and let herself feel scared and worried. It didn’t last long. She’d done this too often to let herself wobble in emotional vulnerability. On the other hand, she’d too often walled herself up behind her Slayer duties and hadn’t allowed herself to truly feel. She’d missed too many opportunities that way. Perhaps another Slayer could handle whatever apocalypse might be dealt out, but this one was personal. This was Spike and Buffy wasn’t going to let either of her extremes keep her from handling this.

She stood up, steel back in her spine, and headed into the house.

“Girls, I’ve got to go to California,” she said. Nadia had evidently finished her work out and was headed for the shower; Paige was clicking channels on the remote. “I’ll leave as soon as I can. Don’t know when I’ll be back.”

“Slayer business?” asked Nadia.

“I don’t know,” said Buffy. “Maybe. Either way, it’s personal. I’ll brief you when I know more and if I need you.”

“Yes,” said Nadia.

“You got it,” said Paige sardonically, already turning back to the tv.

“Keep an eye on Shorepoint cemetery, okay?” said Buffy. “Some hinky stuff going on there the last few nights.”

“We will,” said Nadia.

Buffy nodded back to her and went to her room, grabbing a bag and tossing stuff into it. She called the airline and found herself a seat and then called and left Giles a message.

Out of options and needing to wait for a flight, she put in a call to Dawn, suddenly needing to talk to her sister.

“I’ve got five minutes before I must study,” said Dawn, answering the phone.

“You might want to take ten,” said Buffy.

“What’s the matter?” asked Dawn immediately, her tone sharp. “Are you okay?”

“Relax. But…I’m going to Neptune,” Buffy replied.

“Why? Are Veronica and Logan okay? Is Tara okay?” asked Dawn anxiously.

“Yes, to all of the above, apart from the fact I may have inadvertently given Veronica the ability to have Slayer dreams and she has now twice dreamt that Spike came back to life in the Hellmouth.”

“Repeat that in non-crazy talk,” said Dawn, after a stunned silence.

Buffy told her everything Veronica had told her and what Giles and Tara had said.

“So I’m going,” she ended.

“I’m coming, too,” said Dawn. “I’ll get a flight and meet you there.”

“No,” said Buffy, aware she was going to have to play this card. “You’ve got finals and we don’t know anything for sure.”

“Buffy, this is Spike,” said Dawn emphatically.

“As if I don’t know that,” said Buffy. “Dawn, it’s the man I love we’re talking about, so don’t act like I don’t know this is important. But we don’t know the actual truth.”

“I’m not a little kid anymore,” said Dawn, “and I loved him, too. So, no, I’m coming.”

“Dawn, you will not,” said Buffy. “I’m asking you, begging you, to stay there and finish the normal and wonderful education that I didn’t get to have. You only have a short time and then you’re done. After that, you can do whatever you want. If something bad happens, I’ll let you know.”

“Not everyone wants what you want,” said Dawn stubbornly.

“You can’t fool me, Dawnie,” said Buffy. “You love studying, for some weird Willow-rubbed-off-on-you reason. This is your dream and I don’t want you to give it up unless it’s actually life or death.”

“I do love studying,” said Dawn, pouting. “But you know that as soon as I get the normal degree Giles is requiring due to some stupid desire to make sure Watchers have a practical handle on the world, as if I didn’t, I’m going into the Watcher’s Academy and I’ll be knee deep in demonology for the rest of my life.”

“Way to convince me to let you come,” said Buffy.

“I’m just saying your logic about me pursuing normal is faulty,” said Dawn.

“I’m saying I love you and I’m glad you get to do all the research forever,” Buffy replied.

“Fine, I love you, too,” said Dawn grumpily.

“You are such a nitwit,” said Buffy. “But thanks for staying.”

“The minute finals are over, I’m coming,” Dawn warned.

“And I will welcome you with open arms,” Buffy said, because she really would love to have Dawn there with her.

“And with Spike,” said Dawn.

“If so, I hope it’s really Spike,” said Buffy softly. “Dawnie, what if it’s not him? What if I go through all of this and he’s still really gone? What if I have to put him down again? Or what if it’s really him and I have to deal with him suddenly being back in my life?”

“What if you never try and you spend the rest of your life wondering?” said Dawn. “Buffy, this is big and you gotta do your job.”

“Including slaying Spike?” Buffy suggested.

“Including saving the world and Spike,” said Dawn. “Let me know if I can help, okay?”

“I will,” Buffy promised. “Don’t worry about us either. We’ll be fine and I’ll keep you updated.”

“I love you contractually,” said Dawn.

“I love you actually,” said Buffy.

Dawn muttered something and Buffy stifled a smile.

“I do have to actually study,” said Dawn. “If I’m actually going to take these finals and actually finish this stupid paper.”

“Okay, I’ll text you when I land,” said Buffy.

“Thank you.”

“Bye, Dawnie.”

Buffy hung up the phone. A few minutes later her phone beeped with a text message from Dawn full of abbreviated words and symbols she didn’t really understand, but that was okay, she got the intent.

Buffy texted Veronica her flight info and then collapsed back on the bed. She’d get a shower, she’d finish packing, and then she was headed back to the mouth of hell. Or at least, Neptune, which Veronica and Logan were always saying made Sunnydale look like a walk in the park.


	4. Chapter 4

Veronica managed to clear her schedule even further after speaking with Buffy and letting Logan know Buffy was coming. She called Mac and told her what was going on and was relieved when Mac said she’d do some research. Veronica knew when Mac said “research” she meant the most exhaustive search of the Internet the world had ever known. True to her word, Mac sent over a preliminary report later that day and Veronica read through it anxiously before making dinner.

There were numerous examples of people who claimed to have seen the future. Mac had divided them into categories like: clearly nuts, verified by experts and events, and unknown. She had further divided them into age, gender, religion, and country of origin. 

Veronica focused on the women her age and found a startling number of girls throughout history who had experienced things similar to her. It was actually quite reassuring, if still alarming that it was much more likely that it could happen to her.

By the time she’d finished the report Veronica was certain of two things: one, Mac was a genius, and two, she couldn’t keep reading the same information over and over or she’d go crazy. She needed a break.

She put some pasta on to boil and got some chicken on the grill. She’d never put too much emphasis on cooking - she was more of a baker - but she found that the process helped her to calm down when she was on a case and connect pieces together she wouldn’t think of otherwise.

Instead, she found her mind wandering to the neglected pregnancy test sitting on the counter in her bathroom and Logan’s wounded face when she said she wasn’t going to take it yet. The odds were very against her being pregnant, she hadn’t even been technically late yet, but Logan had been so excited that she had quickly caught his enthusiasm. Of course, that had been before her dreams.

She wondered if she was sticking her head in the sand, but she just didn’t think she could cope with being pregnant while all of this was happening to her. Maybe there had been a part of her that just wasn’t ready for children anyway. She knew the idea terrified them both and they’d been debating the idea for over six months before they finally decided they were ready. Perhaps a little more time wasn’t a bad thing. 

She knew that was what Logan was worried about, that this dream thing would put the kaput on the kids idea, and she was a little annoyed that was his main concern, rather than her mental well-being. She was being a little harsh, she knew he cared about her more than anything, but she was struggling not to panic and she’d appreciate a little catering to her whims.

Why was she panicking about having sudden dreams about the future and being possibly pre-cognizant? Well, that would be because she knew this wasn’t the first time this had happened to her. Yes, there had been the bus crash dreams after she’d met Buffy, but Lilly had been haunting her long before that. Lilly was the reason Veronica hadn’t been on the bus. The dreams she’d had with Lilly telling her things had helped her on many cases and had helped her resolve a lot of issues. They just had never been as clear as the ones about Spike, so something had changed. Veronica just didn’t know what.

Logan got home while Veronica was still finishing dinner.

“That smells good,” he said, greeting her with a kiss on the head.

“I am but a humble cook,” she said, smiling up at him.

“Normally I’d agree with you, but I am being entirely truthful when I say it smells good.”

“Well, if there was one thing I learned growing up with my dad, it was how to grill,” she said.

“My sainted father-in-law, may he be blessed,” said Logan. “Since that is something I did not learn from my own papa, I will set the table for my contribution.”

“He can be taught,” said Veronica in mock surprise.

Logan smirked at her before reaching over her head for the cutlery.

It wasn’t long before Tara got there and they ate together. It was a normal enough occurrence in their lives. Tara’s coven was just inside the Neptune city limits and after she’d established it two years ago, she’d become a constant fixture at their house.

“How was class today?” asked Logan. “Did you have to keep anybody after?”

“It might surprise you, Logan,” said Tara, “but most students in Wicca higher learning actually want to be there. I’m not teaching public high school.”

“A detriment to all public high schools,” he replied smoothly.

“Logan, chew,” said Veronica.

He blew her a kiss before putting more chicken in his mouth.

They chatted amicably but there was a level of tension in the air that Veronica knew was originating mostly from her. It was simply difficult to act like it was just another normal dinner for them. They had barely finished before Tara stood up and extended her hand to Veronica.

“Come on, sweetie; let’s do an aura reading before you vibrate out of your chair.”

“Thank you,” said Veronica.

“Is this a private reading or can anyone join?” Logan asked with a forced casual tone.

“You just have to be quiet so I can concentrate,” said Tara, glancing at Veronica.

“No leering,” said Veronica.

He saluted them both and sat back in his chair.

Tara took Veronica’s hands and closed her eyes in concentration. Tara’s magic had always been subtler and more nuanced than anybody else Veronica had known, not that she was an expert. In her time with the coven, Tara had been able to hone her powers to have so much skill Veronica knew Giles had often begged her to become Dean of Magic at the new Watcher’s Academy. For the moment, Tara was content where she was, for which Veronica was glad.

Veronica couldn’t feel anything, but she was simply happy to have something being done. It was a long time before Tara opened her eyes and sat back in her chair, looking a bit tired.

“You okay?” asked Logan. “You need anything?”

“Just some water,” Tara said, taking a drink from her glass. “That was a little deeper than I normally go.”

“How long do I have, Doc?” asked Veronica.

Logan shot her an unappreciative glance at her macabre humor.

“I think you’ll live,” said Tara in a quiet rebuke. “As far as I can tell, there’s no spell or presence influencing you. There has been a shift in your aura though. Like…something that was lurking beneath the surface was suddenly switched on or given a power boost. I would definitely say that you’ve always had this ability. I don’t think it was anything Buffy passed on to you, though I’ll have to verify that when she gets here. How it got juiced up, I don’t know.”

“Well, that’s somewhat reassuring, I guess,” said Veronica. “So…what does that mean?” 

“It means research,” said Tara mildly. “I’ve learned a lot, but in the magic business, research is always the best way to figure things out.”

“This is what Mac was able to find,” said Veronica, giving Tara a copy of Mac’s report. “So far, anyway.”

Tara skimmed over it.

“Wow, that is incredibly thorough,” said Tara. “I’m once again very pleased she’s teaching my students.”

“It’s a brand new world and the witches are trading in their broomsticks for laptops,” said Logan teasingly.

“We’re not stuck in the Middle Ages,” said Tara. “Perhaps the 1800s.”

Logan smiled broadly at her and Veronica could tell he was very much relieved she didn’t have some demon living in her head. Granted, Veronica was very relieved about that herself. It still did beg the question, though – what exactly was going on and why?

“So do you think it’s safe to go down to Sunnydale?” asked Veronica. “I promised Logan I’d ask your permission.”

“Advice, I said advice,” said Logan quickly.

“May I?” asked Veronica, not looking at him.

Tara laughed while Logan crossed the room and put his arm around Veronica. She leaned into him instinctively.

“I think it will be okay,” said Tara. “It’s obviously connected to all of this and pretty much the next logical step. Just be careful, it’s been a long time and the military has definitely let up on its guard.”

“I know,” said Veronica.

“Mac’s been keeping an eye on it, as you know,” said Logan. “With Buffy with us, we should be protected.”

“Well, I’d like to go, too,” said Tara. “You never know when you might need a witch.”

“Hell yeah,” said Veronica.

“So we’re doing this again,” said Logan.

“Come on, you know you were getting bored with normality,” teased Tara gently.

“Not when we’ve got witches haunting the place,” said Logan.

“I think you’re confusing me with a ghost,” said Tara. “Easy amateur mistake.”

“Just testing you,” he said. “Besides, I wouldn’t trade a lot of things about the past seven years, it’s just…”

“Just?” asked Veronica, pulling away to look at him.

“Well, I want the next part of life,” said Logan, avoiding her eyes.

Veronica leaned back in to him, not really wanting to see his either. 

“We’ll get there,” she said quietly.

Tara watched them and then started clearing the table.

“How many times, Miss MaClay?” asked Logan, moving forward and taking plates out of her hands.

“I refuse to be treated like a guest,” said Tara.

“Well, in that case, I’ve got some tax forms in there you could look over,” said Logan.

“If I were a tax consultant, I’d be happy to,” said Tara. “Now if you had some potions…”

“Dang, fresh out,” said Logan.

They bickered amicably while clearing up the kitchen and Veronica was grateful for the moment to think.

She still wasn’t really ready to talk to anyone about Lilly, but she had the feeling that was going to become important later. In the meantime, with Tara researching and the threat of something influencing her gone, she was able to relax for the first time since her second dream. Veronica had never been one to like being forced into anything, but something about this situation was incredibly important and she was somehow being used to bring it about, and that was daunting. In the meantime…well, in the meantime, at least Buffy was on the way and they could start getting more concrete answers. 

***

Buffy’s flight was on time, for which Logan was grateful. He’d had to deal with an increasingly irritated Veronica as the day wore on and she had run out of things to arrange and clients to pass off. They’d had an argument that morning about not telling her dad what was going on. He’d even brought out Wallace as ammunition, but Veronica had been adamant she wasn’t going to say anything until after they’d been to the Hellmouth. Logan thought it was going to backfire on her, but even if it didn’t, he knew they’d be hurt they hadn’t been some of her first phone calls.

Out of all of their friends, Mac had been the one to integrate most fully into the world of the supernatural. Wallace and Keith were both friendly with the Sunnydale crowd, but they’d warmed to magic even less than Logan. Keith and Giles kept up a rather cordial friendship, but other than that, their interactions were limited to outings with Tara.

Weevil and Dick had been formally introduced to magic at Logan and Veronica’s wedding, when it became apparent it would be impossible to hide it from them at that point. Duncan had already been forcibly introduced to magic when his mother had engineered the body swap between Buffy and Veronica in the first place, but after he’d moved to Australia, he hadn’t been as much a part of their life.

But all that meant was that those of their friends who weren’t as friendly with the otherworldly parts of their lives became forced to the fringes when Veronica and Logan had an apocalypse to deal with. It had caused some friction and Logan was very aware of that and tried to mitigate it as much as possible, which is why he thought it important Veronica talk to her dad and Wallace at least. He could understand that she was scared to talk to them about it and so after the argument he’d tried to be as conciliatory as possible, but he’d at least wanted to point it out.

Now that Buffy was here, at least there was someone else for Veronica to focus on, which would make him feel less like a ticking time bomb. Strong-willed different opinions were still their number one source of conflict and likely would be ‘til they died.

Logan pulled up to the arrivals area and Veronica scanned the waiting passengers.

“There she is,” Veronica said, getting out to help Buffy with her bags, a pointless gesture since Buffy was stronger than both of them put together.

Logan hopped out as well and there were quick hugs all around before Buffy ducked into the back seat and Logan peeled away from the curb.

“How was your flight?” Logan asked.

“Very boring,” said Buffy, “as was the long layover.”

“Last minute flights are not fun,” said Veronica.

“You said it,” Buffy agreed. “So, I hate to jump straight into business, but I’ve been anxious for about fourteen straight hours now, so feel free to fill me in.”

Logan and Veronica exchanged a glance before Logan turned back to the road and Veronica launched into Tara’s visit the night before. 

Buffy listened quietly and Logan kept one eye on her in the rearview mirror as often as he could spare it. 

When Veronica finished and told Buffy that they’d made plans to head for the Sunnydale cavern in the morning, Buffy nodded and looked out the window for a moment.

“I’m glad I didn’t give you Slayer diseases,” she said finally.

“Way to focus on the positive, Buff,” said Logan.

“A Slayer is always positive,” said Buffy.

“Excuse me?” said Veronica incredulously.

“Sorry, just something poor Wes said to me once, back in the day,” said Buffy.

“Ahh,” said Logan.

They had met Wesley Wyndham-Pryce before, the first time being at Buffy’s funeral years ago, but despite Veronica and Logan’s relative closeness to Buffy and her crew, they’d spent little time with Buffy’s ex, Angel, and his crew, even though they were based in LA.

“Beside many points,” said Buffy. “Thank you guys for getting everything set up, I’m sorry this has burst in on your lives.”

“Eh, we’re always glad to see you and have our lives in danger,” Logan said.

Veronica shot him a glare and he shrugged at her and then winked at Buffy in the mirror.

They were mostly quiet on the way back and then Buffy got settled in while Logan went out for takeout. He imagined they probably talked while he was gone and he didn’t grudge them that, it was partly why he’d offered to get dinner anyway.

Both of them seemed more relaxed when he got back and so Logan was happy to let the matter of potential resurrection rest and simply catch up with his friend.

“How many Slayers you got now?” he asked.

“Just two,” said Buffy. “Nadia will be moving on soon, she’s got real potential and definitely wants to make slaying her life business.”

“It takes a certain type, Slayer powers or not,” said Veronica.

“Yeah,” said Buffy. “I don’t really know if my other Slayer is going to make it, she’s got attention span issues and doesn’t seem motivated.”

“Maybe she’s missing her Watcher,” said Logan idly. “What was his name again…Zach?”

“Levi,” said Buffy, glaring at him. “You know full well that was a mistake, Logan.”

“All I’m saying is that you can never replace a good Watcher,” he said, trying to hide his smile.

Buffy kept on glaring and Veronica looked caught between joining Buffy and hiding her own mirth.

“Wasn’t it good I was trying something new?” said Buffy. “I mean, he was cute and smart and had an accent. Where could I go wrong?”

“I don’t know; some kind of weird triangle with a newly trained Slayer?” said Logan as if it was a purely hypothetical scenario.

Buffy huffed a laugh herself and leaned back.

“I give, I give. I shouldn’t have tried to move so fast. I think I was just in a space where I suddenly panicked about the rest of my life.”

“Well, you had circumstances,” said Logan, relenting.

“Well, I don’t know. The circumstances excuse felt exhausted by that point,” said Buffy. “I grieved for a long time and by the time I was over that, I just felt like being me, you know? Finding out who I was without a guy, happy without a relationship, focusing on other things. But then I reached a point where I was…lonely. So I decided to try dating again and it worked for a while.”

“I really liked Gene,” said Veronica.

“Who didn’t like Gene?” agreed Logan.

“Gene was the dream,” said Buffy, smiling in memory. “That was just one of those times when you want different things.”

“So no Gene, let’s jump Levi?” said Logan.

“Logan, you’re a pig,” said Veronica.

Buffy’s face twisted a little, but then she smiled.

“Yes, Logan, it was very much exactly like that,” she said sarcastically.

“Well, then what was it like?” he asked. “Don’t dry up on me, Summers. I did miss our girl talk so much.”

Buffy threw a pillow at him, lightly, he was sure, but it still knocked the wind out of him.

“Let’s just say I really considered trying to make things work with Angel again,” said Buffy.

“Ahh,” said Logan.

“Right,” said Buffy. “Thankfully, I considered that for about an hour until I realized that, ironically enough, I’d be using him as a substitute for Spike, which wouldn’t be fair to either of them or myself. Not to mention Cordelia, which I still can’t wrap my head around, but then again…no judgment from over here.”

“No, we couldn’t have that,” said Logan.

“Shut up,” said Buffy. “All I’m saying is that I was really at a place where I finally thought it was my time, all Buffy, all Slaying, all love happy. Levi was just kind of a bump on that road.”

“A significant bump now,” said Veronica. “Not even noticeable down the road.”

“Probably right,” Buffy agreed.

“Except as teasing fodder,” pointed out Logan.

“Look, Echolls, if you want we can drag out all of your past mistakes,” said Buffy. “I’ve got a list.”

“Veronica’s probably got pictures,” said Logan.

“Oh, I do,” said Veronica.

“Then let’s talk about something else,” said Logan. “Like anyone else. How is Giles and how is Willow and have you talked to Anya and Xander lately? What about your neighbors in Cleveland, how are those people?”

Buffy and Veronica exchanged amused/not amused glances. 

“It’s not like you don’t already know those things,” said Buffy. “Giles is big happy important Watcher guy. Willow has her own coven and works at the Academy. Xander and Anya’s little guy is about the cutest thing Africa has ever laid eyes on.”

“Exposition out of the way,” said Veronica.

“No, not,” said Buffy. “Not out of the way, because I want to hear about you guys. I am All Bad At Communication Buffy.”

“You really are,” said Veronica. “I don’t know why, but somehow it always feels like you guys are about five years behind on technology…”

“Weird,” agreed Logan.

“I have noticed that myself,” said Buffy. “I think I still have a beeper.”

“Of course you do,” said Veronica. “Mac would be so ashamed of you.”

“Well, I’m not a tech person,” said Buffy. “Just ask Willow, but I flunked computer class and it wasn’t because a demon tried to take over the Internet, I promise.”

“No excuses,” said Veronica. 

“I promise I will try and do better,” said Buffy. “You know if the Hellmouth doesn’t get resurrected and we all die.”

“Whoa there, Summers,” said Logan, very uncomfortable with the idea even as a joke. “That’s what you’re here for.”

“Sorry, bad joke,” said Buffy. “I never learned appropriate humor.”

“No, I’m just…tense,” said Logan.

“You wanna talk about it?” asked Buffy, with a sidelong glance at Veronica.

“Nothing to be said that hasn’t been said before,” said Logan.

“He’s worried that I haven’t told my Dad or Wallace what’s going on,” said Veronica carefully.

“Why not?” asked Buffy.

“I want to know what to tell them,” Veronica explained. “They’re…normals, really.”

“I think they both handle news really well,” said Buffy. “They accepted me, remember?”

“Well, that directly affected them,” said Veronica. “This may not. Somebody’s got to handle the business while I’m taking care of things, it may as well be my dad.”

“He’s a good PI, but I think he prefers being a father first,” said Buffy.

“Tough,” said Veronica. “I can’t handle anything else right now. As for Wallace, he’s finishing up his first year teaching and really happy with his girl and until I know what’s going on, I’m not going to tell him. My head, my decision.”

“Backing way off,” said Buffy, putting her hands up.

“Sorry. I am also tense,” said Veronica.

“Then that makes three of us,” said Buffy. “Where’s Tara, she’s always a good buffer.”

“Doing her own life clean-up so she can perhaps be prepared for world saving in the near future,” said Veronica. “She’ll meet us here tomorrow for the big road trip.”

“Hope you have good tunes,” said Buffy.

They talked for a long time that night, avoiding any more discussion about the next day, until Buffy finally stood and stretched.

“Heading up?” asked Logan.

“Naw, thought I’d case the town,” said Buffy. “As I recall Neptune has a very poor cemetery to body ratio, but there’s always cliff sides where bodies might have gotten dumped over.”

“In Neptune, I wouldn’t be surprised,” said Veronica. “You know your way back in.”

“Be safe,” said Logan.

“It’s so sweet when he worries,” said Veronica.

Buffy ruffled Logan’s hair on her way out of the door. Logan suffered the indignity in silence and then offered his hand to Veronica.

“Shall we?” he asked.

“We shall,” said Veronica.

They headed up for bed together and Logan took the opportunity to relax as much as possible before the potentially life-changing next day.

***

_Veronica stood beside Buffy and the other Slayers as they opened the Seal and headed into the Hellmouth. As they descended Veronica noticed her dream had changed. The other Slayers were gone; Tara and Logan had joined them now._

_The four of them stood there watching the battle play out, even watching another Buffy fight._

_“This is new,” Veronica said._

_“This is as it has to be,” said Tara._

_“Why the cryptic?” asked Veronica._

_“It is the way,” said Tara._

_“The way to what, of what?” asked Veronica._

_The three of them ignored her as Spike’s form was once again engulfed in light._

_Veronica stepped toward the amulet, reaching to pick it up as she had before. Tara barred her way and gestured to Buffy, throwing something glittering into the air that swirled around them and settled over Buffy’s head like a halo or a crown._

_Buffy knelt and picked up the amulet. Nothing happened for a long moment and they stood in the dark in silence._

_The dark cloud swarmed up and Spike appeared, screaming. Veronica reeled back from the pain she felt from him._

_He looked at them, vamping out and growling. Buffy went to him, her arm outstretched. His own was held out in front of him, his palm face out. She put her palm to his and a spark ignited, fire leaping up from their hands._

_“It’s time,” gasped Spike._

Veronica slowly opened her eyes. Every dream was both less and more terrifying.

“Three time’s a pattern,” she said quietly.

***

Buffy roamed around Neptune for a bit, but there was never much vampire activity there and the only thing she did was break up a couple of bar fights with the biker gangs. She slept well for the first night in a while, which was odd considering she was in a different time zone and in a different bed. She’d always had odd sleeping habits though, so it wasn’t unusual for her body to adjust to new situations. She awoke the next morning and did some stretching before wandering downstairs where Veronica and Logan were already awake and eating.

“Didn’t want to disrupt your sleep,” Logan said, waving her into a chair. “Eat up, Tara should be here soon.”

“This looks good,” said Buffy, putting bacon in her mouth.

“Why, thank you.” Logan buffed his nails on his shirt.

Veronica simply rolled her eyes and wandered over to the window, as if watching for Tara. She looked tenser than she had the night before and Buffy wondered if she’d had another dream. She didn’t feel like bringing it up though, so breakfast was eaten in mostly companionable silence.

Buffy helped clear the kitchen and then went downstairs to the basement Logan and Veronica had set up as a workout room. It had the standard weight machines and treadmill, but there was a punching bag and a sparring ring as well, with full length mirrors down one wall. In the corner was a large, wooden, beautifully carved chest, a wedding present from Xander and Anya, and it held almost as impressive a weapon collection as Buffy’s. It certainly was less used. The only items that looked truly battered were the stakes.

Buffy had brought her own stakes, checked in her bags, but she shifted through the weapons to find a sword that was well balanced to her hand. It didn’t have the same feel as her swords at home, but it would do. She missed the feeling of wielding the Scythe, but she’d given it to Faith long ago, knowing it wasn’t really hers to keep anymore.

“Just what I was going to do next,” said Veronica, poking her head in. “Find what you need?”

“Yeah,” said Buffy. “We’re not expecting trouble, so just the latest edition of Mr. Pointy and a sword will do.”

“I’m just going to grab some stakes for Logan and I,” said Veronica.

“Perfect. Tara here?” Buffy asked.

“Just pulled up,” Veronica replied.

Buffy and Veronica joined Logan and Tara in the entryway.

“Buffy, how are you?” asked Tara, giving her a warm hug.

“I’m okay, how are you?” Buffy asked, returning the hug.

“I’m wonderful. It’s really good to see you,” said Tara.

“I know, I’ve been bad about visiting,” said Buffy.

“We all are,” said Tara.

“No, don’t lump yourself in with the rest of us. I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you at least once a year,” said Buffy.

“All right,” said Tara agreeably. “Are we ready to go?”

“We’re ready,” said Logan. “Let’s go hunting.”

They piled into the car and started their journey. Buffy and Tara chatted in the back seat, exchanging all the news about Buffy’s Slayers and Tara’s coven and what Dawn and Giles were doing. The topic of Willow was usually avoided, but every now and then Buffy had to slip her into the conversation and it was good to see that it didn’t seem to bother Tara. It had been six years for them and Buffy was happy to see both of them had moved on.

Veronica and Logan let them catch up, sometimes exchanging quiet words in the front seat. Gradually though, their whispered words became harsher and Buffy and Tara both cut off their words when Veronica spit Logan’s name out in a reproof.

“I’m sorry,” Veronica said immediately. “Listen, I had another dream last night.” She relayed it to all of them. “Tara, can you tell me why the dream keeps changing? Are we making it come true somehow?”

“It doesn’t sound like that to me,” said Tara, thoughtfully. “It’s more like as we put the pieces of the puzzle together, other pieces come to light. I just think more is being revealed the further we go along.”

“It makes me nervous,” admitted Veronica. “What did Spike mean, ‘it’s time?’ ”

“I guess we’ll find out,” said Tara.

They drove the rest of the way in silence, parking a fair distance from the actual cavern. The government had quartered the entire place off with barbed wire and warning signs for unstable ground. They’d had guard rotations for the first year, but as time went on and nothing happened, the military had gone back to other things and Sunnydale had been buried in minds and paperwork, a local legend to the nearby towns. Nothing had been recovered, though some looting had had to be quelled at the beginning.

Buffy led the way to the spot she and Faith had discovered when they did their own reconnaissance after the battle, wanting to make sure no Turok-Han or Bringers had survived. 

“Something’s been here recently,” said Buffy, looking at strange marks on the ground. “I don’t know what though.”

“That would be a helicopter,” said Logan, who admittedly had the most experience with riding in them of the four of them.

“Who would bring a helicopter here? The military?” asked Veronica.

Buffy shook her head.

“I don’t know, but let’s be careful.”

It was a long hike down and Buffy was glad she was wearing shorts by the end of it and that Logan and Veronica had packed plenty of water for everyone.

When they got to the bottom Buffy had to stop for a moment and keep herself from tearing up. When she had been down here before, she’d been numb or high on adrenaline and she hadn’t had time to focus on what losing her home had meant to her. Despite all of the trouble and grief, Sunnydale had been her home and there were many good memories buried here along with her mother.

This was the first time Buffy had been back since the immediate aftermath and the past rushed to meet her along with the rubble. The place was an absolute wreck, but there were signs of nature having its way, trees and bushes and grass growing over the cement and glass and wood and steel.

“Where to now?” Logan asked after they’d all considerately let her compose herself.

“The origin of it all,” said Buffy, plowing a way through, bits of insight coming back to her from her last trip.

It took them a long time to make their way to where the high school had been. It had been the epicenter of the collapse and was still the center of the cavern.

“How do we get in?” asked Veronica.

“Faith and I forged a tunnel of sorts,” said Buffy. “Let’s see if it’s still there.”

It was and they all exchanged silent looks before leaving their packs and taking only their weapons and flashlights down into the dark.

The building itself was entirely caved in, but it was almost like the Hellmouth had flung everything away from itself as it died, because their way was relatively clear and Buffy and Faith’s efforts from before had marked their way, the ribbons they’d tied still there, fraying around the edges.

“Does it look the same?” asked Logan.

Buffy was about to retort that she would have no way of knowing that exactly when she noticed something and stopped. There were fairly fresh footprints in the dirt.

“No,” she said slowly. “Someone’s been here.”

Tara stopped and put her hand on the wall, concentrating.

“Someone’s done magic here recently,” she said. “Dark magic.”

“So what do we do?” asked Logan.

“Keep going,” said Veronica. “We’ll never get answers if we just stand here.”

Buffy felt trepidation about descending into the Hellmouth itself, but she led the way, resolutely shining her flashlight ahead and holding her sword loosely in her other hand. The blackness swallowed everything but the tiny bit of light their flashlights illuminated. When Buffy reached the place where she’d fought her last battle, she stopped, calling quietly for Veronica to come forward.

“I guess I need to guide us from this point,” said Veronica. “I wish I had more light.”

Tara whispered a few words and tiny balls of light flickered into place all around them, rising high, spreading the light.

“That’s beautiful,” said Logan.

“And useful,” said Tara, winking at him.

“Okay,” said Veronica, sounding surer of herself. “I stood over here.” She walked and they followed her. “Then I saw the glint of light from the amulet over here.”

They followed her again and then stopped as she stood, searching for something, her face tense, head cocked like she was listening.

“What next?” Logan finally asked.

“Sh,” said Veronica and stood still again. She started, like she’d seen something behind them and then began moving and knelt down, pushing rocks and ash out of her way. “Here,” she said, and her voice shook.

They gathered around her and saw clearly illuminated in Tara’s lights the amulet, dented and tarnished, but undamaged, lying on the ground.

“I should have come back for it before,” said Buffy.

“You couldn’t have known it would be here,” said Tara.

“It is here,” Buffy answered, not taking her eyes off of the amulet.

“You should pick it up,” said Veronica, looking at Buffy. “It was you.”

Buffy shuddered inwardly, but knelt down and spread her fingers over the surface of the diamond, then slowly gathered the chain and held it up. It felt cool and gritty in her hand and she gently rubbed her fingers across the surface. She didn’t know what to expect and looked at Veronica, who shrugged.

“What happens now?” asked Logan.

“We wait quietly,” said Veronica, taking his hand.

Nothing happened and Buffy began to feel relieved and disappointed. She turned, gathering the amulet and its chain into a loop and put it over her neck, preparing to leave and admit defeat.

Light glowed in the heart of the amulet and glowing embers and dark smoke mixed together flowed from it and swirled before them, gradually taking shape in the form of Spike, his right hand outstretched, palm face out, his voice loud and sudden in the quiet as he screamed.

Though they were all half expecting it, Buffy was the only one who didn’t jump backwards. She took a tiny step forward.

“Spike?” she whispered.

He looked at her, his voice quiet now, but his form still shaking. He vamped out and growled at her, then fell to his knees, his hand still out like it was permanently stuck in that position.

Buffy moved forward cautiously, reacting instinctively, and knelt before him, putting her left palm against his. His fingers twined around hers and her heart began to beat faster, memories rushing over her.

The others were watching them intently, but she only had eyes for Spike and his ragged imitations of breath.

He looked up and his vampire features melted away and she was left looking into his eyes, filled with confusion and pain.

“B-Buffy?” he asked finally, his voice rough and broken.


	5. Chapter 5

_Buffy slipped back into the house with Spike at her back. The house was full of wannabe Slayers and her friends and she moved to the door of the basement, ducking down the stairs to the only place with any privacy, especially since Faith was ensconced in her room._

_The weight of the amulet was heavy in her pocket and she closed her eyes once she was sitting down on the cot, wondering what exactly they were supposed to do._

_“Penny for your thoughts, love,” said Spike, kneeling down in front of her._

_“Lucy got to charge nickels for her advice, surely my thoughts have to be worth more than that,” she said, opening her exhausted eyes._

_“Pay billions for the privilege,” he said, putting his hands on her thighs, before remembering the blood and making a face._

_“Well, I’d pay a lot for yours,” she said. “Though I’d likely have to borrow the money to do it.”_

_“I’d have to steal it,” said Spike. “Nobody would loan me anything.”_

_“Except kittens,” she said, smiling at him._

_“Shall I pay you a kitten?” His eyes gleamed slightly._

_“If you like,” she said, and then sighed. “What are we going to do, Spike?”_

_“Whatever you want,” he said, some of the warmth leaving his face. “Slayer’s gotta make up her mind.”_

_“Don’t put this off on me,” she said. “I’ll thank you to remember I’m not your keeper. I put my trust in you when you got the chip out and became Spike the Fanged Big Bad again.”_

_“Only I didn’t,” he said. “Spike the Bloody Puppy is more like it.”_

_“You miss it, don’t you?” she said. “Ravaging the world, the blood of the innocent.”_

_“Like you wouldn’t believe,” he said, his eyes far off. “It’s freedom, the hunt and the kill. You know it, Slayer, you know the call.”_

_The worst part was that she did, but she also felt a different call and she knew he did as well._

_“But you chose me,” she said, pulling his face back to her. “You risked everything to be a better man, and you are. I believe in you, Spike, with or without a soul.”_

_“The only thing worth anything is you, pet,” he said, kissing her lightly._

_“So this is your decision,” she said. “Angel said a Champion, and that’s you.”_

_She eased the amulet out of her pants and passed it to him. He took it, the look of wonder on his face something she never wanted to forget. She was telling him how much she trusted him to have her back and that it didn’t matter who he was, she chose him._

_“I’ve been called a lot of things in my time…” he said, trailing off._

_“What do you want?” she asked. “We don’t know what this thing does, but we do know what it will do to you.” She had to admit, there was a part of her that wondered if he would change, like Angel had, if having a soul was such a different thing for every vampire. Naturally, this time it would be a reversal. She’d fallen for the demon, not the man. What if she didn’t actually like the man?_

_“Got no desire for a soul,” he admitted. “I didn’t much like having the one I had.”_

_“Because you’ve always been bad?” she questioned._

_He smiled and then looked a bit abashed._

_“Well, not so much. Was a bit of a nancy boy actually.”_

_“I knew it,” she said, smiling widely. “I knew you were only boasting.”_

_“Hey now,” he said, grasping her shoulders and smiling wickedly at her. “I’ve had plenty of time to practice, yeah?”_

_“Agreed,” she said, letting him kiss her. After a few moments though, she knew they had to make a decision before she could fully form her battle plan. She couldn’t let herself focus on the personal for long. “So, what are you thinking?” she asked._

_“Another kitten to me,” he said absently. “Buffy, I- you know it’s all about you. I gotta choose what will help you; hope you see in me what Dru saw.”_

_“She may have the sight,” said Buffy, always irrationally annoyed at mentions of Drusilla, “but I see you more clearly than anyone.” He inclined his head, waiting for more words. “I don’t know who you’ll be with a soul, but I’m willing to risk it if you are.”_

_“You deserve a soul,” said Spike. “William was a good man.”_

_“That’s not what I meant,” said Buffy._

_“I know, pet,” said Spike. “I just mean, I can give you something, a man who’d never have to rein it in, never do anything to hurt you.”_

_“You don’t hurt me, Spike,” she said._

_“Not for a while,” he said, lifting an eyebrow._

_“And vice versa,” she said, pouting a little._

_“Only when I beg,” he said, sliding behind her and wrapping his arms around her middle._

_She turned to face him and slung her arms around his neck. The amulet slipped from his fingers onto the floor behind her._

_“So, you’ll do it?” she asked, her mouth hovering next to his._

_“I’ll be your Champion,” he said, sealing his words against her mouth._

***

He couldn’t describe his surroundings if he tried. Hell, he couldn’t describe himself if he tried. He wasn’t anything anymore. He’d been solid and whole and determined and light had filled his being. Then he was tearing apart under its weight and falling into nothing. Yet there was something else there, something pulling on him, something that gathered him to himself, whoever he was. The light was no longer there, but there was darkness and a searing pain inside of him. He’d been scattered and now was thrust back together, each bit of him colliding in sharp pricks. 

He opened his eyes and he was there again, where he had been last. He felt it even though there was no light. He could not see, but he could feel and he knew that something was wrong because screams were coming from him and he was falling. He shied away from that pain, so confused about what was happening, letting his instincts slide over him, feeling a shift in his face.

Something cool and yet warm touched his hand and he grasped hold of it with everything he had. Someone was talking, saying something, but he could only barely lift his head, something inside him reacting without precedent. He knew there was no breath in him, but he desperately searched for air, for anything that would take away the painful sensations and confusion.

His face changed again and something appeared in his vision, a woman, kneeling, her hand holding his. She was beautiful and familiar, her entire body something that made him feel safe and happy. He stared at her, trying to remember. She was important.

His body calmed its raging need for peace as he looked at her and then the bits came flashing across his mind. He was hunched over paper, pen in hand, he was sinking to his knees in an alley, he was waltzing in a burning warehouse, he was dropping a body, licking the last drops of blood from his lips, he was driving a black car, he was in a wheelchair, he was in a white cell, he was running through a cemetery, he was wrapped around her body, he was falling from a tower, he was standing at the bottom of a staircase, he was in a hospital, he was striding through the sand, he was training with young girls, he was fighting in a cavern, he was burning up, he was burning up, he was burning up.

He knew her.

“B-Buffy?” he said, his voice rough.

“Spike, it’s okay,” she said, moving closer. “I’m here.”

“Did we win?” he asked.

She frowned and he wondered what was wrong.

“We did,” she said quietly. “You did it all.”

“Champion,” he said finally, not really knowing what he was saying.

“Yes,” she agreed. “Are you okay, are you injured?”

“No,” he said absently, wondering why it was so dark. “Got fried a bit from the light doohickey, but I’m all right, love.”

“Spike, I-” she stopped, as if unsure what to say. “Come on, we need to get you out of here.”

“Buffy, the sun,” came another familiar voice he couldn’t quite place.

She swore quietly and he chuckled at the sound.

“Let’s get to the entrance then,” she said.

“What’s going on?” he said. 

“There’s a lot to explain,” she said, “but we need to get going first.”

“Always follow your lead,” he said, standing, his body wobbling.

She caught him when he tried to fall.

“Let me help,” said another voice, and a strong arm slipped around his other side.

“Scottie,” he said happily.

“Good to see you, man,” said Logan. “Can you walk?”

“Dunno,” said Spike and tried.

With faltering steps Buffy and Logan led him and he lost count of the steps they took. He couldn’t concentrate on anything; his brain was still whirling and trying to make sense. Something was off, but he didn’t know what it was yet. 

“Is it really him?” he heard whispering from behind him.

Light began to grow up ahead as they climbed rough steps and Spike sagged against Buffy’s arms.

“Let him rest,” said Buffy. 

Her warmth vanished from his side and then Logan eased him to the ground. Spike opened his eyes and spotted Veronica and Tara whispering with Buffy a little ahead of them.

“What’s wrong?” he asked Logan.

“I do not even know where to begin with that question,” Logan said, a half-easy, half-worried smile on his face.

“Who didn’t make it?” Spike asked, panic beginning to fill his head. “Where’s the Bit?”

“Dawn’s fine,” said Logan. “That’s not the problem, Spike, just…try and relax.”

Tara began muttering words and Spike felt something wash over him and he glared at her.

“What the bloody hell is going on? Glinda, what are you doing to me?”

“Spike, just calm down,” said Buffy, reappearing at his side.

“Slayer, what’s happening?” he asked. He squinted at her. “You’re-you’re different. You’re different.”

“Yes, I am,” she said, smiling sadly. “A lot different.”

“Where am I? Who are you?” he asked, worried.

“Spike, I’m still me,” she said gently. “Tara tells me you’re still you. That just leaves about five years of time in between us.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked suspiciously.

“Spike…you died five years ago.”

***

Logan instinctively leaned back as Spike’s eyes widened and he shook his head in confusion.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

Buffy’s eyes were tight and she took a deep breath before talking again.

“Spike, when you put the amulet on, you destroyed all of the Turok-Han, you collapsed the entire city. You closed the Hellmouth.”

“Sounds grand,” he said. “Where’s the bad in that?”

“That was five years ago,” Buffy said. “You didn’t make it out. But we…well, we thought we should come down here and check-”

“Five bloody years later!” he said, his voice rising.

“Spike, it’s not like that,” said Buffy, her eyes filling with tears.

“What is it like?” he growled.

Veronica moved over and Logan felt her warmth at his side as she knelt by Spike.

“I had a dream,” she said. “I had three dreams that what just happened happened. So I convinced everyone to come down here.”

“What?” asked Spike, clearly not comprehending her words.

“Something brought you back,” said Veronica, exchanging glances with Buffy. “It wanted us to know or how to do it, but you were dead, Spike.”

“I died,” he said, like it was the only thing that made sense. Logan figured that perhaps it was.

Veronica and Buffy nodded.

“It’s good to see you,” said Veronica with a strained smile. “Nice to know I’m not crazy either.”

“Mind like a steel trap there, Private Eye,” Spike said almost absently. 

Veronica continued to smile and Logan couldn’t help but be glad to see it. 

“Spike, the sun is out,” said Buffy. “We can’t take you above ground yet, but we’ll get you back to Neptune and then figure out what happened, all right?”

“Why five years?” he muttered and then banged his head back against the wall a few times.

“Spike, stop,” said Buffy, grabbing his shoulders and holding him in place.

“You’re not my keeper,” he said harshly, beginning to struggle with her.

“Spike, please,” said Buffy.

Tara moved out of the background and said a few words, placing her hands on Spike’s temples. 

His eyes began to droop and he stopped struggling, slowly relaxing.

“Thank you,” said Buffy, then got up and walked away toward the darkness again.

They let her go and Logan found himself staring at Tara and Veronica.

“What’s going on?” Logan asked.

“That is Spike,” said Tara. “I’m sure of it.”

“Then what happened?” asked Veronica.

“He’s confused,” said Tara. “Coming back from the dead is a lot to adjust to. I wish we didn’t have to tell him like that.”

“Will he be okay?” asked Logan.

Tara shrugged. 

“I think sleeping will make things better. We have a few hours before we can get him out of here. We could all use some time to adjust. I don’t know what…he’ll be or do. Supposedly he got his soul back when he put on the amulet. There’s something different in his aura, but I can’t figure it out.”

Veronica put her hands on her head and sagged against Logan.

“You all right, my sweet?” he asked.

“You sure do ask a lot of questions,” said Veronica. “Yes, I’m fine. I’m just trying to take it all in, trying to understand why this happened.”

“When you figure it out, let me know,” Logan said.

“The first as always,” she said.

Tara looked off into the darkness where Buffy’s form could be seen standing rigidly.

“I hope she’ll be okay,” she said.

“Buffy’s the strongest person I know,” said Veronica.

“Literally,” joked Logan.

“Do you think we brought him back or was it the magic from before?” asked Veronica.

Tara frowned.

“Well, whatever Buffy did with the amulet was the catalyst, but something had to have enabled that. Whoever was casting magic in here did something, but I can’t tell who or what.”

They waited there in the dark, Spike sleeping, Buffy staying away from him.

Logan moved to the entrance of their little tunnel and reported back on the movements of the sun until Veronica told him to be quiet.

He didn’t blame her; he was only doing it to keep himself from going crazy. He felt incredibly uncomfortable. Even the joy of possibly having Spike back wasn’t enough to make him entirely happy with the events of the day. His skin had crawled when Spike had come out of the amulet like the proverbial genie from a bottle. Something had been set in motion by their coming here, and he just didn’t know what it was. The fact that it was using Veronica’s head just made everything worse.

Still, that was Spike there, Tara said it was, and Logan believed her. Hearing his own particular nickname from Spike’s lips was like flashing back five years and it was good to hear.

Before the sun set Buffy finally came back and stood beside Logan at the entrance.

“We should get ready to go,” she said. “I really want to get out of here.”

“You gonna go catatonic?” he asked, nudging her.

“Honestly, a girl does that one time,” said Buffy, returning his nudge. 

He rocked on his heels and smiled.

“Twice,” he reminded her. “Just…let me know if you need anything,” he said.

“Logan, you literally pay for the roof over my head,” she said. 

“People have more needs than physical ones, my dear,” he said.

“Imagine that,” said Buffy, and then squeezed his elbow. “Thank you. I just needed some time and likely will need more time and then more.”

“Time it is,” said Logan. “Speaking of,” he pointed his finger casually at the sky with a flourish.

“Tara, when will he wake up?” asked Buffy, moving back.

“I can wake him up any time,” said Tara, “but probably not for another hour or so on his own.”

“Then let’s get moving,” said Buffy. “I’d rather carry him then…” she trailed off.

“Let’s go,” Veronica said into the silence.

They gathered their things and moved out of the cover of the Hellmouth and into the crater of Sunnydale.

It was much harder than that morning even though they were going back over covered ground. It was darker, though the sun’s light could still be seen coming from over the lip of the crater walls. Add to that their exhaustion and the fact that Buffy had Spike slung over her shoulders, and it was not the best hike Logan had ever experienced.

They made it back to the walls in good time, however, and Buffy put Spike down, breathing a little heavily.

“I don’t know what they feed you in Amulet Land,” she said, “but it certainly doesn’t make you a light-weight.”

“Do you want me to wake him up?” asked Tara.

Buffy nodded. 

“Yeah, I can’t carry him and climb at the same time - or not very well anyway.”

They all took a breather and then Tara did her magic.

Spike’s eyes opened rapidly and he shot to his feet.

“Spike, it’s okay,” said Buffy. “We’re ready to go home, but I need you to climb, do you think you can do that for me?”

Spike hesitated, his eyes darting around, and Logan wondered what he was afraid of.

“Sure, sure,” said Spike.

“Okay, Tara,” said Buffy, “you go first with the light. Veronica and Logan next, then Spike, I’ll go last.”

Before they could begin their climb, Buffy stiffened and pulled her stake out of her pocket. Spike cowered away from her and put his back to the cliff.

“Buff-” began Logan, and then stopped because he could see what Buffy had felt.

There were vampires surrounding them in the darkness.

“Weapons,” said Buffy calmly.

Logan stepped forward and handed her the sword she had given to him to carry, pulling out his stake with his other hand and putting his back to Veronica’s. 

Tara stepped closer to Spike and was muttering words under her breath.

“Give us the vampire,” said one of the other vampires.

“Over my dead body,” said Buffy. “Again.”

“Just the way I like it,” said the vampire.

He vaulted forward and Buffy met his attack with ease. She slipped under his punch and spun down with her leg out, tripping him.

Logan didn’t have time to watch her anymore because vampires were coming at him and Veronica.

“Aren’t you glad we train?” asked Veronica, grunting as she punched a vampire away from her.

“Desperately glad at the moment,” said Logan, ducking under a leg and lurching upward to plant his stake in the vampire’s heart, absurdly pleased he had somehow gotten first dust that night.

Glancing to his right he saw that Tara had conjured several fireballs and was using them to immolate her opponents. Behind her, Spike was crouched along the wall, staring up with intense concentration and confusion.

“Why doesn’t he fight?” Logan asked.

“Maybe he doesn’t remember how,” said Veronica.

Logan began to wish he’d stayed home. He was already tired and never really a match for a nest of vampires on his best of days.

“Climb,” he heard Buffy calling as she beheaded a vampire with one hand and staked one with the other.

He had no time to be impressed because there were about ten more closing in on them.

Tara had turned and was already urging Spike up. Veronica took Spike’s hand and helped him while Tara vanished into the darkness. Logan covered her back until Spike was moving and then started to climb himself.

“Buffy,” he called.

“I’m right behind you,” she said, executing moves that would have made any other Slayer green with envy.

The vampires fell back for a moment, regrouping, and Buffy jumped onto a ledge just under where Logan was standing, staring down.

“Move,” she ordered him and he began to scramble upwards. 

Below him Buffy grasped her sword and thrust it into the rocks on either side of her, first one, then the other. Logan heard rumbling and then saw Buffy stick the sword into the wall and swing herself upward to land even higher than he was. Beneath them both, the rocks began to fall and hit the vampires beginning their own climb upward.

Buffy reached down her hand and pulled Logan up to stand beside her.

“You are good,” he said, staring down at what destruction he could make out from the weak light.

“We need to move now,” she said. “That won’t have gotten them all.”

He nodded and they began to climb. He was amazed at how quickly they caught up to the others, but it was because Spike wasn’t doing too well, often stopping and staring, in danger of falling unless someone was urging him on.

They climbed until Logan’s lungs burned and he began to wish for their journey of the morning. The path was clear, more like a steep hike than anything else, but too often they had to grasp harsh rock and scrabble for secure footholds. Sometimes Logan imagined he heard sounds from down below them and then began to keep going with as much renewed energy as he could.

When they finally reached the top, Buffy ordered them to run and grabbed Spike, half supporting him as she followed her own advice. Logan really wished they’d parked closer.

Finally, he saw the car and he fumbled for his keys.

There was a growl out of the darkness and Buffy shoved Spike toward Tara and Veronica, who supported him toward the car while Buffy slowed to face the five vampires who were advancing toward them.

“Give us the vampire,” one of them said. “He doesn’t belong to you.”

“He doesn’t belong to anyone,” said Buffy, pulling out her stake again. “But you can bet that if he did, it would most certainly be me.”

Logan started the car and Veronica and Tara slung Spike into the back seat.

“Buffy, let’s go,” shouted Veronica.

Buffy backed toward them slowly; Veronica flung the door open for her.

One of the vampires rushed her and Buffy grabbed her, slamming her into the car’s hood, staking her through the back.

Buffy ducked into the car and Logan gunned it, heading back toward civilization.

***

Buffy slumped down in her seat, trying to calm the adrenaline rush still swarming her body. She glanced behind her to where Spike was sitting between Tara and Veronica. He was staring at his hands and muttering and it was freaking her out. He’d talked about railroad spikes and dolls and mobs and subways and warehouses and alleys and something about effulgence, whatever that meant. None of it was making any sense and Buffy was starting to panic herself.

This was exactly what she had been worried about, that Spike would come back and he wouldn’t be himself, that something would be wrong. Something was clearly off with him, but she didn’t know what it was. The possibilities weren’t endless, but they were varied. Perhaps it wasn’t really Spike that came back or maybe because he had his soul now, he was having difficulty handling that change. Maybe just coming back from the dead had unhinged him. Buffy honestly didn’t know what happened to vampires once they were dust, even the ones with souls. She just knew that being brought back to life was one of the worst things that had ever happened to her and she wouldn’t wish that on anyone, especially someone she loved as much as Spike.

But maybe it had been different for him. She had been in heaven, maybe he had been in hell, and maybe the soul hadn’t made a difference. Of course, just coming back to life had to be disorienting and he didn’t seem to think any time had passed.

Still, no matter where he had come from, he was here now and she didn’t know how to feel about that. He was right there, close enough to touch, but she felt miles away from him. She’d spent their last few hours in the Hellmouth trying desperately to get a grip on her emotions and deal with the shock of suddenly having him back in her life. Tara had confirmed it was really him, but that didn’t mean he was her Spike anymore.

Having vampires to fight had been almost welcome, but the fact that they had obviously been waiting for them and wanted Spike begged more questions she didn’t have the answers for.

It was a very silent ride and Buffy used it to continue to quiet herself, to make sure she was able to handle this. When they finally got back to Neptune, she hugged Tara goodbye and then took Spike upstairs, a quietly understanding Veronica and Logan leaving them alone.

Spike finally appeared to take notice of his surroundings when she led him in to her bedroom.

“Where are we, love?” he asked.

“In Neptune. This is Veronica and Logan’s house,” she replied.

“They moved back to Neptune, huh?” Spike asked.

“Got married,” she said. He nodded and kept his arms folded like he was protecting himself. “Spike, can we talk?” she asked.

“Always like talking to you,” he said.

“Even when I’m telling you to shut up?” she said, an attempt at levity.

“Oh, especially then,” he said.

She led him over to the bed.

“Can you tell me what happened?” she asked. “What’s the last thing you remember?”

“The cavern,” he said, not looking at her. “You left and I…burned. Then you were there again.”

“So, you didn’t go anywhere or feel anything?” she asked.

“Don’t remember five years going by, no,” he said. “Didn’t get flung to hell that I can remember.”

“Good,” she said simply.

“Why?” he asked, looking at her.

“I wouldn’t want you to be in hell,” she said, cautiously putting her hand on his.

He looked down like he didn’t know what to do with that, but he didn’t shake it off.

“It’s what I would expect,” he said. “So, five years gone. What’s been happening?”

“Well, I live in Cleveland now,” she said. “We shut down the Hellmouth there about two years ago and I’m a bit retired. Dawn’s finishing up college.”

He looked up at the mention of Dawn, his eyes flashing.

“Good for the Bit,” he said.

“Yeah, she wanted to come and see you,” said Buffy, “but I told her to finish school.”

“How’d you know I’d be there?” he asked.

“Veronica’s been having dreams,” said Buffy. “Dreams about you coming out of the amulet. They felt very real to her so she called me and we decided to go down and investigate. Here you are.”

“But you never came before,” said Spike.

“Faith and I went back the next day,” said Buffy, trying to quell the memory of standing in the dark and finding no remnants of him, not that she’d thought to dig through the ash to find the amulet. “You weren’t there. Nothing was there.”

“So you moved on,” he said, nodding. “Yeah, that’s good, that’s right.”

“I tried,” she corrected softly. “It wasn’t easy.”

“Never is,” he said blankly.

“Spike, do you know why you’re back?” she asked. “Do you still have…your soul?”

When she said the word he flinched and shied away from her.

“The spark,” he said. “They put the spark in me.”

“The amulet did,” she said. “So, you still have it?”

He nodded, back against the wall now.

“All it does is burn,” he said wildly, looking away from her. “Buffy, I hurt the girl.”

“No, you didn’t,” she said.

He laughed and looked at her, a sardonic grin on his face.

“What I’ve done you can’t imagine. I didn’t feel it before, but now I do. It’s all back, all home where it belongs. It’s in here,” he said, jabbing at his chest. “I need it out, get it out!” He began clawing at his own chest and Buffy reached to stop him.

“Spike, no,” she said, tearing up at the sight.

He stopped suddenly, his own eyes wet, and he looked at her, pain on his face.

“I’m tired. I don’t want to be alone. Can we rest now? Buffy, can we rest?”

She nodded, biting her lip.

“We can rest, Spike.”

“Can you just hold me?” he asked.

She pulled him toward her, taking his jacket off and leaning him back against the bed. She climbed in beside him, curling up against his side. She was hit with the memory of the night she had come back from the dead herself and the numb feeling inside, but him beside her, holding her together.

“I got you,” she said, repeating his words to her. “I got you.”

***

Buffy woke up and Spike was still asleep beside her. She hoped he was dreaming of something good. She carefully disengaged herself from his arms and walked over to the window, making sure the curtains were securely closed. She needed to do something but she didn’t want him to wake up with her gone.

She grabbed her cell phone from her jacket pocket and quietly dialed a number.

“Angel Investigations, we help the helpless,” answered a male voice she didn’t know.

“I need to speak to Angel, right now,” she said.

“Boss ain’t here yet.”

“I know he sleeps there, go and get him. It’s Buffy,” she said urgently.

There was a sharp intake of breath on the other end and then she heard mumbled voices.

“Hold on a sec,” said the voice.

It was a few minutes before anything happened and Buffy had more than enough time to feel righteously angry by the time Angel’s voice came over the line.

“Buffy, are you okay?”

“Do you want to explain to me exactly what the amulet was for?” she demanded.

“Buffy…I told you everything,” said Angel, sounding confused.

“Then why is Spike alive?” she asked.

There was only silence on the other end.


	6. Chapter 6

_Veronica walked down the street in a city she was only somewhat familiar with. People crowded all around her and she walked with the flow to find the source of the disturbance._

_There was a building towering over all the rest and she felt drawn there. It was a plain office building, similar to any other of its kind, but there was a menace that seemed to emanate from the walls. There was a whispered hush amongst all the people standing by its open doors. Veronica reached the door and turned to look behind her and noticed none of the people gathered there had faces._

_She closed her eyes and when she opened them again she was standing inside the building, a line of vampires on either side of her like an honor guard. Spike knelt at the end of the line, the amulet slung over his neck. A woman with dark hair stood beside him, hand on his shoulder._

_Spike’s eyes were yellow and Veronica jumped backward when he lunged at her._

***

Veronica had entertained a half realistic dream that because Spike was now alive, whatever was going on inside her head would stop.

When she woke from her latest dream, she realized the unlikelihood of that ever happening and it was like an icy chill settling over her. There was a moment when she simply let her imagination run free about what this would do to the rest of her life. She glanced at Logan beside her, sleeping, and grimaced. No, it was better not to think about this long term; what she needed was to understand the present.

This dream was different from the others, but it had the same feeling to it. Veronica was learning to differentiate between them. They each were pieces of a puzzle she had to put together, but they all meant something individually and they left her with a different sense of need at the end.

This dream left her filled with dread and a sense of foreboding, though she couldn’t understand what it meant. She hadn’t recognized anyone other than Spike or where she was.

More than that, though, she wanted to know _why_ and Veronica was usually very good at finding out why.

She dressed for the day absently, trying to figure out how she was going to investigate places and people from her dreams.

Logan came up behind her and dropped a kiss on her head.

“Any dreams last night?” he asked. She nodded, filling him in quickly. “Any idea what it means?” he asked, anxiety flickering on his features.

“Nope,” she said, “but I intend to find out.”

She moved purposefully to her laptop and started a case file, inwardly scolding herself for not having done so sooner.

Logan let her go, a smile playing around his lips, like he was happy at the sight of her doing what she did best, but she knew he was still worried.

She ignored him getting ready behind her and then the sound of the shower while she typed up all she could remember from her dreams, the results of Mac and Tara’s research, and what had happened the day before.

Finishing a while later, she felt better and reached for the coffee Logan had thoughtfully brought her.

“You done getting it all out?” he asked her, poking his head in the bedroom.

“Yup,” she said, stretching. “I’ll need to go in to the office later to see about using some of the equipment there.”

“What’s the plan?” he asked.

“Research,” she said. “I’ve been freaking out about this for too long now and I intend to get to the bottom of who and what.”

“Sounds like you and Buffy had the same idea,” said Logan. “She called Angel this morning. He’s on his way.”

“I guess that’s good,” said Veronica, not ecstatic about the idea of more people around. Usually whenever she was knee deep in an investigation, more people were a hindrance rather than a help. “They can work on the supernatural ifs and I will find out the whys.”

“Angel’s a…detective, right?” asked Logan.

“I believe that’s what’s on his business card. That and a lobster of some kind,” said Veronica.

“Maybe they can help,” Logan said, shrugging.

“We’ll see,” Veronica said, not convinced. “I’ve never been too fond of our vampire friend.”

“That’s just Spike’s influence,” pointed out Logan. 

“How is he?” asked Veronica.

“See for yourself,” Logan said, gesturing to the hallway. “No sense hiding in here when there’s so much fun to be had.”

“How generous,” she said, sweeping past him.

Spike and Buffy were in the living room. Buffy was standing in the doorway like a silent sentinel while Spike was pacing in front of the fireplace, muttering.

“Morning,” said Buffy tightly.

“Is he all right?” Veronica asked, somewhat pointlessly.

“I think it’s…guilt,” said Buffy. “I think having the soul back is driving him crazy.”

“Why?” Veronica asked.

“Well, he tried to cut his own heart out several times,” said Buffy crisply. “He keeps talking about what a bad man he is and apologizing for things. I haven’t seen him this loopy since the First brainwashed him.”

“That was pretty bad,” Veronica agreed.

“So, what’s next on the to-do list then?” asked Logan.

“Beat Angel for answers when he gets here,” said Buffy. “Keep Spike from hurting himself. Try not to go crazy myself.”

“Did you sleep?” Veronica asked, examining her closely.

“We both did,” said Buffy, her face softening a bit. “But ever since he woke up, he’s been like this.”

“I’m going to go to the office,” said Veronica. “I need answers of my own.”

“I wish you luck,” said Buffy. “Sorry about bringing more people down on your head.”

“Logan can handle it,” Veronica said cheerfully.

He mock glared at her.

“I am not your homespun entertainer, my darling.”

“But you’re so cute you could be,” she said, giving him a kiss and then leaving again. Being in the same room with Spike while he was like that was making her unbearably sad.

Spike had been one of her best friends and when she’d lost him, she’d grieved for a long time. Seeing him hurt was not something she ever wanted. If she could postpone that and work on whatever was happening to her at the same time, she could handle that.

She made her way to the office, driving instinctively rather than actively. Her brain was busy worrying over the different pieces of information she had. Unfortunately, it had forgotten one thing: her father could read her like a book in person.

When she arrived he was knee deep in her files and she raised an eyebrow.

“Is this a visit of a personal nature?” she asked.

He lifted his head and started to smile, then frowned.

“Sit,” he said.

“What, am I grounded?” she asked, complying.

“No, just not sick, lying to me, getting me to handle cases you’d usually rather die than hand over to anyone else, and I’m guessing you’ve been making a lot of phone calls to a certain Slayer we know. How am I doing?”

Veronica inwardly sighed, but outwardly she simply smiled charmingly at him.

“Now, now, you’re going a little overboard with the protective bit, don’t you think? I do believe I am,” she pretended to count on her fingers, “almost twenty-five years old and have my own license and everything.”

“Veronica, what’s wrong?” he said, not buying it.

“Spike’s alive,” she said, giving in.

“What?” Keith said incredulously.

“Well, undead. But not burned to a crisp at the bottom of a crater, so there’s that,” Veronica replied.

“When did all of this happen?” asked Keith, sitting beside her.

“Yesterday,” she said. “Buffy flew out here. She, Tara, Logan, and I went to Sunnydale yesterday and found the amulet, which Spike then came out of. Apart from getting attacked by vamps on our way home, everything’s fine except Spike who’s not quite there. We’re trying to figure out why he’s back and that’s why I need you to cover my cases for me.”

“I’m happy to help,” Keith said, admonishing her. “I’m not happy to be lied to.”

“I’m not lying,” she said. “Not very much anyway.”

“Veronica.”

She knew when she was beat. She broke down and told him everything. Well, she kept the baby issues to herself; that was something she and Logan had to figure out before she went blabbing about it to anyone else. She told him everything about her dreams and how she’d been the trigger for it all.

“I’m trying to figure out what it means,” she ended softly, looking at her hands.

Keith was holding one of them tightly and he chuckled low in his throat.

“Only you, Veronica. I told you I was going to lock you up if you got involved in anymore magic.”

“I’m pretty sure you were kidding, if that’s any consolation,” she offered.

“A little,” he said. “I’m sorry, honey. It’s gotta be hard.”

“I don’t want to be dramatic and say it’s like getting some kind of bad diagnosis,” she said, “but I can’t help feeling like my life is going to be changed forever and not the way I’d wanted it to.”

“I’m guessing I won’t be a grandpa any time soon then,” he said casually.

“We’ll see,” she said and he didn’t push.

“Well, let’s put the old man to work,” said Keith. “The old man who is still twice the detective you’ll ever be and who will find many clues that you missed.”

“That is an awfully big boast,” Veronica said, unable to help her smile. “I wouldn’t want you to strain yourself and end up in the hospital.”

“I am in the prime of life, Veronica,” Keith said. “I can handle all your cases with one hand behind my back.” He grew serious again. “But please tell me when you need help with this. Do not, I repeat as you appear to have issues remembering such things, do not forget to update me as to what’s going on.”

She saluted him gravely and tried to tell him with her eyes how grateful she was for his support and that he wasn’t pushing her. He would have only a few years before, but he was the kind of parent who knew when to let go and yet still never be far away.

She settled in at the computer to keep her investigation going, comforted by the familiar motion and her dad working in the office beside her.

***

Buffy looked at the clock and then back down at Spike. He was huddled in the corner talking to something that wasn’t there. He hadn’t recognized her in the last twenty minutes and she was about five minutes from burning the house down.

Right on cue, Logan poked his head in the door, a tray of food in his hands.

“You’re really taking this entertainer thing to heart,” said Buffy.

“As Veronica commands,” said Logan. “You need to eat, after all.”

“I need answers,” she said.

“Alas, poor Buffy, there are no heads to bash,” he said. “Unless mine isn’t protected by virtue of not knowing anything helpful?”

She looked wistfully at his head for a moment.

“No,” she said reluctantly. “I guess you’re safe.”

“See, that’s why I remain ignorant,” he said cheerfully, sitting down after pouring himself a glass of something cool.

“Where is Angel?” Buffy muttered.

In the corner, Spike stiffened and began rocking back and forth.

“Shouldn’t have mentioned the A word,” said Logan.

Buffy sighed and sat down beside him, only to jump up a minute later.

“I’m not used to seeing him like this,” said Buffy. “Even when the First brainwashed him, he was more…evil than insane.”

“Guilt’s a funny thing,” said Logan, a tight expression on his face.

“Yeah,” agreed Buffy, sure an identical look was on her own.

They ate in silence for a while and Buffy was once again very grateful for Logan who had been carefully insolent with her ever since they’d met.

It was another forty-five minutes before Buffy’s cell chirped with a text, and she ran out of the room after she saw it was from Cordelia, opening the front door. A moment later, a dark Plymouth turned into the driveway and parked in the shadiest spot. A blanketed form rushed from the car to the house followed by the more leisurely forms of Wesley and Cordelia.

Buffy let the slightly smoking Angel inside before she very pointedly did not push him up against a wall and beat him to death, but instead silently led the way to the living room where Spike was still hunched over in the corner.

“Is this what you wanted for yourself?” she asked. “Or would it not have mattered since you already had your soul?”

“You made the decision to let him wear that, Buffy,” said Angel, his face worried as he looked at Spike. “I would have and you know that. You do not get to put this off on me.”

“What I want is for you to explain to me why you gave me something that would do this at all, whoever was wearing it!” she said.

Cordelia and Wesley came into the room then and stopped short at the tableau in front of them.

“Is this a private staking or can anyone join?” asked Cordelia, her voice loud in the tense silence.

“Hi,” said Buffy, and then turned back to Angel.

“Welcome to my humble abode,” said Logan, rising from the couch. “We have refreshments here, would anyone like one?”

“Iced tea?” asked Cordelia.

Logan nodded.

“Thank you,” said Wesley, following her. “It was rather a dry journey.”

“Gotta hate those,” said Logan, pouring everyone drinks and pointedly sticking one in Buffy’s face.

She glared at him before her shoulders slumped and she went to stand in the corner by Spike.

“So, what’s the deal?” she said. “Angel, tell me why Spike’s back.”

“You’re being overly emotional,” said Cordelia, sipping her tea. “This isn’t Angel’s fault. If he’d known what the amulet was going to do, he’d have told you. Some very tiny part of you should know that.”

“I swear I didn’t know,” said Angel and his voice was angry.

“Fine, good intentions all around,” said Buffy, though she wasn’t going to let this go for a while. “What can we do about it?”

“Why don’t we hear the whole story from the beginning?” suggested Wesley.

Buffy began the tale and Logan supplied details that she wasn’t sure about. Wesley actually took notes and Cordelia urged Angel to sit beside her, holding his hand. Buffy noticed that Angel’s gaze was mostly on Spike.

“That’s quite a tale you’ve got there,” said Cordelia. “So where’s Veronica?”

“At work, attempting to decipher her latest dream,” said Logan.

“How adorable,” said Cordelia.

“May I see the amulet?” asked Wesley.

Buffy nodded, pulling it from her pocket. She hadn’t let it out of her possession since the cavern. She’d been meaning to have Tara take a look at it, but Tara hadn’t been back yet.

Wesley took it carefully and held it up to the light.

“Shiny,” was Cordelia’s response.

“I did examine this when Angel originally procured it,” Wesley said, “but there’s always the possibility I missed something important.” He said it like he was expecting to be yelled at and Buffy thought about it, but he’d long ago proven his abilities and she wasn’t about to open those wounds again. “It doesn’t appear to be any different than I remember. Perhaps,” he said and muttered to himself, trailing off as he examined the necklace.

“I think we lost Wes,” said Cordelia.

“Buffy,” said Angel, “do you mind if I speak to Spike alone?”

“I’m staying if you do,” said Buffy, “but everyone else can go.”

Angel nodded like he’d expected that answer.

Logan and Cordelia took their cue and hoisted a still absorbed Wesley to his feet and escorted him from the room.

Buffy tried to remain unobtrusive as Angel stood and made his way cautiously to Spike’s corner. Spike stiffened as Angel approached and sniffed the air. He became the most alert he’d been since the night before and began laughing wildly.

“Spike,” said Angel, kneeling in front of him. “Do you know who I am?”

“Angelus, my Yoda,” cackled Spike. “You made me a monster, but I’m not yours and I won’t do it, not ever.”

“Do what?” asked Angel.

“I’m gonna be clean now,” said Spike. “Been clean for her, to be the kind of man who would never…”

“You have your soul back,” said Angel. “It’s hard, I know.”

“It’s all flames in here,” said Spike. “I can’t do it.”

“You can,” said Angel. “You will do it.”

“Not my boss, not my sire,” said Spike, shaking his head.

“William,” Angel said sternly and leaned forward, lifting Spike’s chin so that he was looking him in the face. “You will listen to me.” Spike stared at him, transfixed, and Buffy watched with almost as much fascination. “You can be a good man. It hurts right now, everything you did, all the people you killed, they’re all inside your head, every single one of them.” Spike nodded. “It makes you want to drown yourself but that’s not the answer. You need a cause, something to fight for. Redemption. Buffy was the start of my redemption just like she was yours. Fight for her, Spike. Let her guide you and don’t be afraid. When it hurts you think of her and what you want to be for her.”

“I don’t know me,” said Spike.

“I do,” said Angel. “You’re reckless and irresponsible and annoying and sentimental and irreverent. You don’t pay attention to the rules, the proper way of things.”

Spike laughed, throwing back his head. 

“Too bloody right,” he said.

“That’s better,” said Angel. “Now are you going to mope in the corner or are you going to get up and help?”

“What answer gets me far away from you?” asked Spike.

“Either, the feeling is mutual,” said Angel.

“Where’s the Slayer?” asked Spike, his voice clear.

“I’m here,” said Buffy, moving into view.

“Hello, love,” he said, scooting up the wall with a grace Buffy remembered well.

“Spike,” she said.

“You look good for five years later,” he said.

“You haven’t changed a day,” she said.

“How many times do I have to tell you your jokes aren’t funny?” he said.

“Always before I kick your ass,” she said.

He moved closer to her and he stopped just beyond touching her.

“Sounds good to me,” he said.

“Are you back?” she asked, biting her lip.

“Sorry about the detour.” He nodded slowly. “Had to focus on a few things.”

“Planning on sticking around?” she asked.

“I got forever,” he said.

Buffy took a moment to look at him, blond hair, blue eyes, black duster she’d put back on him this morning. He was sprung alive in front of her, out of her memories. There was something new in his eyes though and she wondered if he would revert back to crazy, if he would actually be the man she fell in love with.

“As Spike?” she asked.

He shrugged.

“Your guess is as good as mine. Care to wager on it?”

She smiled.

“Kittens?” she suggested.

“Love me some kittens,” he said, pulling her close and leaning his forehead against hers. He inhaled as if breathing her in.

“It’s a deal,” she said and kissed him.

He was cold as always, but she seemed to burn hot enough for the both of them and he tasted familiar and comfortable like he’d never left and she fought to keep from crying while they kissed.

When they broke apart it was to a very uncomfortable Angel shifting from one leg to the other.

“Are you done yet?” he asked impatiently.

Spike stuck out his tongue at him.

Buffy rolled her eyes.

***

When Logan set the table for dinner he had to put in both extra boards at the table. He and Veronica weren’t exactly void of guests, but they didn’t entertain large crowds on a habitual basis either. It was certainly making life interesting. At least they had plenty of spare bedrooms. While he and Veronica both tried to keep from indulging too much in the expensive lifestyle that ruined so many other homes in Neptune, Logan had wanted to make sure their home was on the larger scale of small. They had two guest bedrooms that would eventually (he hoped) become bedrooms for children, and a large office that had a pull out couch. That didn’t even include the large basement that had its own full bathroom.

He tried to strategically seat everyone since there was more than enough tension to go around and he couldn’t believe he was the biggest arbitrator for peace in the house. That was definitely not his normal role in life.

The good news was that Spike had so far lasted a total of five hours without banging his head against the wall, and that Tara, Keith, and Mac would all be coming to dinner. Wesley had to be dragged away from his books, of which he’d somehow brought a vast assortment, but everyone else appeared eager for food.

Angel would sit uncomfortably for the most part since he didn’t appear to enjoy regular food as much as Spike, but, if Logan remembered correctly from their one joint apocalypse adventure, Angel cooked a pretty mean breakfast.

They’d ordered out again. Not that Logan would necessarily mind attempting to cook dinner for ten people, but neither he nor Veronica were that good in the kitchen and Logan was not about to ask Tara to do it for them.

Dinner was an interesting but still delicious affair, with their favorite Mexican takeout. Keith and Tara kept everyone talking on neutral subjects for a while with help from the surprising corner of Cordelia, but there was no way the subject wasn’t going to come around to their current situation.

“Have you come up with anything, Wes?” asked Angel.

Wesley toyed with his rice and looked up, startled.

“What? Oh, well, nothing as of yet. The amulet bears no markings or inscriptions, matches no descriptions. In some ways I would almost think it was conjured solely for the purpose of closing the Hellmouth. It has no sign of age either.”

“Could the Powers have simply created it when you came to them for information?” asked Buffy, addressing Angel.

“Anything’s possible with them,” said Angel.

“Do some more spot-checking next time, mate,” said Spike in a surly tone. He was no longer acting crazy, but he definitely wasn’t anything near to what one would call jovial.

“Next time there’s an apocalypse I’ll make sure and do a full appraisal before showing up to save the day,” Angel snapped.

“Easy, tiger,” said Cordelia. “Geez, could everyone stop being so uptight? Aren’t we all on the same team?”

“Never.”

“Not with him.”

Spike and Angel spoke simultaneously and glared at each other. Logan suppressed the urge to laugh, but exchanged amused glances with Tara and Mac across the table.

“I’ve got an idea,” said Mac. “How about I do some looking online for your amulet? There might be some things that aren’t in books.”

Wesley muttered something under his breath, but nodded.

“I would be happy to work with you,” he said stiffly. “If the amulet is brand new then there is likely nothing either of us could find, but it never hurts to search every avenue.”

“Atta boy,” said Logan.

“In the meantime,” said Buffy, “what else can we do?”

“Well, I’d certainly like to know more about my dreams,” said Veronica. “I’m pretty sure the city in my dream was Los Angeles. I don’t know who the woman is. I just wish I could take a snapshot of my brain. Pretty sure that it’s impossible to use facial recognition software otherwise.”

“I’d be happy to try and draw from your description,” said Angel.

“Anything to draw charcoal women, yeah?” Spike started laughing.

“This is actually serious, not a joke,” said Angel.

“Right, I would have thought to you anything to do with me was a joke,” said Spike.

“Well, if you put it that way,” said Angel.

“Excuse me, little boys,” said Cordelia, “can we not jump into that particular centuries-old argument? Honestly, get some new material.”

“Cordelia’s actually right,” said Buffy, looking amazed about that fact. “We’re all glad you’re back, Spike, but we need to know why.”

“Speak for yourself,” muttered Angel, and Logan only caught it because he was sitting next to him.

“I’m done,” said Veronica, pushing away her food. “Angel, come with me, I want to get you working before I forget any more details.”

Angel nodded, pushing away from the table.

“If you come with me,” said Wesley to Mac, “I can show you the amulet.”

“Veronica, I’m going to borrow your camera to take pictures to upload,” said Mac.

“Sure thing,” said Veronica.

“I guess the rest of us are on dish duty,” said Logan, rising to his feet.

“I’ll help you out,” said Keith, grabbing the empty cartons.

Tara and Cordelia joined them in cleaning and Buffy and Spike were left sitting at the table looking restless.

Logan and Keith ended up doing the washing and drying portion of the cleanup and they worked companionably. Their relationship really had become much better since the wedding and a rather serious chat that Logan often woke up sweating about.

“She talk to you yet?” asked Logan.

Keith nodded.

“Just a bit this afternoon. How’s she doing?”

“I think she’s scared,” said Logan. “Yet, in typical Veronica Mars fashion, she is choosing to go after her fear tooth and nail.”

“That’s my girl,” said Keith. “I’ve promised her I won’t push on this, so you’re gonna have to do all of that, understand?”

Logan mock saluted him.

“Designated Veronica Mars Herder, as per usual.”

“Don’t let her get too wrapped up,” said Keith. “I’m trusting you, Logan.”

“I know we’ve got a couple of vampires in the house, but I didn’t believe that particular urban legend could come true,” said Logan.

“Just wash the dishes and take care of my daughter,” said Keith.

“We take care of each other now,” said Logan seriously. “That won’t change.”

***

Veronica described her dream woman (and didn’t that just sound weird?) to Angel and then sat back, letting him work. He frowned the whole time, his face steadily getting more and more serious as he drew.

Veronica attempted to think, while accessing her notes on her laptop. They were in the living room, Wes and Mac having taken over the office, and Cordelia had wandered in after finishing clearing the table.

To her surprise, Cordelia hadn’t attempted conversation, but simply sat down across from Angel and watched him work. She had glanced at Veronica every now and then like she wanted to say something, but never did. Eventually she got up and wandered to the end of the room, looking out of the window.

Angel stiffened suddenly and stopped what he was doing. Veronica looked up from her laptop. Cordelia didn’t move from her position by the window, her hand to her head. 

“What’s wrong?” Cordelia asked.

“Cordelia,” said Angel. “This woman.”

“I know,” said Cordelia, turning around. “It’s...”

“Lilah,” they finished together.

Angel turned his mostly finished drawing around and Cordelia walked closer, while Veronica examined the woman from her dream, remarkably like what she remembered, despite the fact he hadn’t finished.

“I had a vision,” said Cordelia. “It’s Wolfram and Hart.”


	7. Chapter 7

Even though he knew who he was now, Spike wasn’t having an easy time adjusting back to unlife. He didn’t know if it would be better if he was in a familiar place, but that didn’t really matter, because the only familiar places that he would want to be in were rubble at the bottom of a cavern he’d created.

Veronica and Logan’s house was nice, touches he could recognize as theirs everywhere, but otherwise, it felt strange to be there. After dinner, he went back up to Buffy’s bedroom, the only place he felt somewhat comfortable.

His head was spinning and he had to keep fighting for constant control of his sanity. Every moment brought a fresh memory to his mind and he had to force it to the background. The things he wanted to remember, like reading to his mother, or dancing with Drusilla on the streets, or the feel of Buffy surrounding him - those were all weak memories, floating like cobwebs in his mind.

The things he wished he could simply vanish were there in vivid detail and color. The first kill, sinking his fangs into his mother’s neck, a little girl cowering in a coal bin, so many faces stained with fear, looking up at the face of their death. He was coated in blood, in evil, in wrong, and he’d loved every second of it. That was the worst part. 

He’d known all of this before, but now it mattered; now it actually mattered. He’d felt somewhat bad about a few things, horrible about his mother, had decided that he’d like to try a new way back when he’d fallen for Buffy, but those smatterings of times when he’d made the right call or done the right thing had never conveyed to him the horrible stain of evil on his being. He’d never known it until he got his soul back.

The moment of getting his soul he’d never trade, but he hadn’t had to think about it at the time. It was all death and glory, dying in a blaze of light. When he’d come back, everything was so new and strange and it had taken him a while to remember everything, to cope with suddenly walking in the world again. Then the first feelings of guilt had hit and he was overwhelmed, suddenly terrified of who and what he was and how he was supposed to live.

So many images flooded his head, so many memories, and he could not handle them. The guilt was too much and by the time Buffy had brought him in to her bedroom, he’d only mustered up enough strength to collapse and beg her to help him rest. She had held him together the whole night, her presence still the most calming thing to him, but with the morning came new thoughts, new memories, and new guilt and he’d fallen with the weight of it all.

He’d been lost within himself, focused only on everything he’d done, and reliving every moment. Every time he’d tried to grab hold of anything other than the badness of who he was, he’d sunk back down into his own personal hell. He was lost, without identity, simply a bad man who’d hurt people. He’d wandered there, helpless, until something familiar had caught a hold of him and dragged him out. 

His theory was that because Angel was a part of the evil memories, Spike had been able to understand his attempts to reach him. Being with Angel was pain and Spike deserved pain. He wasn’t sure he was Spike, he wasn’t sure there was anything but guilt, which had to be William’s influence, but he could hear Angel, he could focus on his words, and he could use those words as a defense against drowning.

The thought of Buffy and what she meant was another lifeline. Being lost was hurting her and that was something he’d sworn never to do. Not hurting anyone was always on William’s agenda, so some kind of truce was sworn. Yet it took all of his concentration to keep from slipping again. Dinner had been its own brand of hell and only sniping at Angel had kept him from going crazy. Just looking at everyone was hard; they all looked so different to him. Only Angel was the same and the idea that Angel could be the one thing keeping him sane was a brand of insanity all to itself.

Spike needed a break and that’s why he was in Buffy’s bedroom. It already smelled like her, which was comforting. The night before had been the only good thing about coming back so far.

He wasn’t surprised when she followed him and he was glad. New and lurking insecurities were present with him and he wanted to be more than an obligation to her. He had no idea what she’d been doing with her life since he’d been gone.

“Needed a change of scene,” he informed her before she could say anything. “Research is not really my thing.”

“I remember,” she said, crossing to sit next to him on the bed.

“Hard to reach back that far?” he asked in simple curiosity.

She shook her head.

“Spike, could you please stop making insinuations about us forgetting you?”

“Not what I meant,” he said, shifting uncomfortably. “I didn’t exactly ask for this, pet.”

“Nobody asked for this,” said Buffy, which made something inside of him twinge.

“Right,” he said, feeling incredibly alone. 

Maybe the kiss they’d shared downstairs meant nothing to her and it had just been some kind of ‘welcome back from the dead’ gesture.

“I-I don’t know how to handle this,” Buffy said, getting up and folding her arms. “It’s just…weird.”

“What am I supposed to do about that?” he asked tersely.

“Just give me some time,” she said.

“You’ve had five bloody years,” he said. “I’m the one who needs sodding time.”

“You didn’t have to watch you die,” she said.

“No, but I’ve watched you die,” he said.

She really didn’t have anything to say to that and he watched her pace for a while, not quite sure why she was panicking now, though maybe it had something to do with not being able to do anything but wait.

She stopped and faced away from him for a minute and then turned back, her face soft. She stepped closer to him and slowly touched his face.

“Spike. Is that really you?” she asked quietly.

“Can’t promise it,” he said, enjoying her touch for all that.

“That’s what worries me,” she said.

“I’m…sussing it all out,” he said. “But you do gotta give me time, love. Can’t expect the Big Bad back all in one minute.” He winced even as he said it, being the Big Bad was no longer all that appealing. Still, neither was being William the Bloody Awful Poet.

“I know, I know,” she said. “I’ve just reached the freak-age stage.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” he said.

“Yes, there is, if I’m being horribly unfair to everyone around me. Of the bad,” she said.

He reached out and gingerly put his hands on her shoulders.

“Faced worse, yeah?”

“Why are you always the one comforting me?” she asked, leaning into the touch.

“Just lucky, I guess,” he said.

“Tell me what you’re feeling,” she said, moving forward and wrapping her arms around his waist.

He adjusted his arms around her shoulders and pondered how strange it was to actually feel her body against him, her heartbeat thumping loudly to his vampire ears. They had never simply hugged often. Their physical interactions had started with violence and ended with sex, but simple, tender affection hadn’t been as much of a part of their relationship until more towards the end.

“Confused,” he said. “Got no idea what I’m supposed to be doing or who I’ll be. Everyone else knows what’s been happening, but I’ve got no bloody clue. Feels like I’m crazy.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, muffled into his shirt.

“Thanks,” he said.

“I-I don’t know how to deal with the fact that you’re alive,” she said. “I’ve lived for so long without you; I don’t know if I know how to live with you.”

“You’re not- you got someone else, right?” he said, stumbling over how to ask the question. “Five years is a long time, love.”

She shook her head and he attempted to keep his relief from showing.

“I…I tried,” she said. “Several times I thought it might work, but it, well, it just never did.”

He blinked, staring at the wall, trying not to feel hurt. After all, it wasn’t her fault he felt like he’d woken up with her in his arms every day for the last two years. To her, she’d woken up without him for five. It didn’t stop the surge of jealousy.

“Sorry about that,” he finally said.

She shook her head and then moved away from him.

“This is too weird,” she said. “Talking to you about dating other people while you were dead. Even for us, it’s just too weird.”

“Got it in one,” he said. “So, what’s next then?”

“We figure out why you’re here,” she said. “Something’s clearly going on and I doubt it was for my love life that you were brought back.”

“You want me to go?” he asked, uncomfortable, gesturing at the bed. “Gotta be someplace else in this place to get some kip.”

She shook her head.

“Angel and Cordelia have the other guest room and Wesley’s on the office couch bed. I guess you could ask to bunk with him if you really wanted…”

He was grateful she was taking things to a lighter place. 

“Me and the Watcher never really got along those few times we met,” he said, shrugging. “Doubt we’re ready to be the Odd Couple.”

“I want you to stay here,” she said, not really looking at him. “Honestly. I want to keep an eye on you.”

“Make sure I don’t go starkers?” he said.

“Make sure you don’t disappear,” she said instead.

“Buffy,” he said, taking a step toward her and then stopped. “I don’t know why I’m back or anything, but, God help me, Buffy, it’s still all about you.”

She smiled a bit.

“Yeah?”

He stepped even closer.

“A hundred plus years and there’s only one thing I’ve ever been sure of: you.”

“You’re still good with the words, I see,” she said, looking rather pleased.

“That’s one thing the soul could never take away,” he said.

“Then I’m glad,” she said.

“So, here’s the deal,” he said. “You’re in charge of this. I got stuff to work out here, but in terms of you and me, you make the rules, right? I’ll follow your lead. Always did like being behind you.”

“You’re a pig, Spike,” she said, but she sounded like she wanted to laugh more than she sounded angry. “Thank you. Let’s just…figure all of this out, and you and I are definitely an important part of that.”

“In the meantime,” he said, “I got the floor if you like.”

“No, you’re in the bed with me,” she said. “Will you just hold me?”

He smiled slowly.

“Always.”

He could see the evening turning into something much more relaxing, but naturally that’s when Logan knocked on the door, saying something about Cordelia having a vision.

***

Logan had finished finding everything needed for all of their guests, feeling quite the little housekeeper, when Veronica came out of the living room, saying Cordelia had had a vision.

Naturally, Logan, thought, just when he was really ready for bed.

“I’ll get Buffy and Spike,” he said, instead of sighing melodramatically.

“Thanks,” she said.

Within a fairly short amount of time they were all gathered again and waiting to hear Cordelia’s revelation.

“It’s the Wolfram and Hart building,” she said, with the voice of one used to giving mission briefings. “There’s a large room, it feels cold and there are a lot of people. Most aren’t human. I hear goats. The only lighting is candles. Spike is there, kneeling on the ground, the amulet is around his neck. Lilah is standing there, directing everything. Spike is angry and upset. They’re on some kind of time schedule.”

“That’s it?” asked Buffy.

“Hey, don’t knock the visions,” said Cordelia. “I tell you what I’m given. Pretty sure this one was meant to corroborate her dreams.” She gestured toward Veronica. “Laid out for you by an expert, of course.”

“So, tell us about Wolfram and Hart,” Keith said, folding his arms and directing his question to Angel.

“It’s a law firm,” said Angel. “They control most of the evil in this dimension. They’ve been enemies of mine for years.”

“Angel’s their poster boy,” said Cordelia.

“They’d like to drive him evil,” said Wesley more diplomatically.

“They’ve almost succeeded a few times,” said Cordelia. Angel looked at her, pained. “What? It’s the truth; you’re a vampire, what have you got to be embarrassed about?”

“I always liked her,” mumbled Spike to Logan’s right.

Angel glared in Spike’s general direction and proceeded to give everyone a more thorough version of his dealings with Wolfram and Hart. Everything from a lawyer named Lindsey who’d left to the current head of the ‘drive Angel crazy’ division, Lilah Morgan. In between were crazy events like bringing Darla, Angel’s sire, back to life, and sending visibly physical symptoms of Cordelia’s visions to complement the raging headache.

Logan set his jaw at that, his imagination working over drive on that one.

“So, now that we know Wolfram and Hart is involved, what does that mean?” asked Mac.

“Nothing good,” said Wesley.

“We still don’t have enough information,” said Veronica. “Someone needs to talk directly to the Powers and figure out their agenda. We need eyes on Wolfram and Hart to figure out what they’re up to as well. I’m thinking they were the people who were at the Hellmouth before us, but it would be nice to be sure.”

“I’ll head back to LA,” said Angel, after some kind of eye contact with Cordelia. “I’ll talk to the Powers and I’ll have a little chat with Lilah.”

“If I could go as well,” said Wesley, “and take this with me.” He lifted the amulet. “I have more resources there and I’d like to get Lorne’s take on it.”

“I have all the pics I need, so that’s good with me,” said Mac.

Buffy hesitated.

“Well, then I would like to come as well,” she said. “We need to know what’s going on and it’s always good to have a Slayer at your back.”

Angel didn’t look happy with the idea but he didn’t argue.

“Some reason why I can’t find out what’s going on with me myself?” asked Spike.

“It’s too dangerous,” said Buffy.

“I’m no wilting flower, Slayer,” said Spike.

“You also came back to life yesterday and have already had one attempt on your life,” said Buffy. “No way you’re getting to go in and offer the lions your head.”

“So you’re leaving me here with the noncombatants,” grumbled Spike.

“Hey,” said Veronica. “I’ve kicked your ass sparring.”

“In her body,” Spike pointed out, gesturing to Buffy.

“Okay, that got a little weird,” said Logan. “Spike, whaddaya say you stay here and I fill you in on the last few years?”

“Scottie, I like you better argumentative,” said Spike, but lounged back on the couch.

“Give me time,” said Logan, under his breath.

Spike shot him a look, but didn’t say anything.

“When do you want to leave?” asked Buffy.

“Right now,” said Angel. “Get back before sunrise.”

“I’m staying,” said Cordelia to everyone’s surprise. 

“Uh, okay,” said Veronica. “You can help with research here.”

“Yeah, I’ll jump on that,” said Cordelia.

Logan narrowed his eyes at her. He knew it was irrational, but she just looked like someone who made him feel extremely on edge. The feeling had never faded no matter the years since their first meeting.

“Let’s get going then,” said Buffy.

Logan watched everyone disburse. Angel and Cordelia exchanged a kiss and a glance before he walked out the door, taking books from an overloaded Wesley with a well-practiced air of annoyance.

Buffy pulled Spike after her as she went to grab her things.

Keith hugged Veronica goodbye and assured her he’d take care of her cases and that she needed to keep him informed.

Mac and Tara left together, commuting to the coven where Tara lived and Mac would be teaching the next day.

Pretty soon, Buffy had everything she needed and she left with Angel and Wesley, leaving Logan and Veronica with Spike and Cordelia.

“Anything I can do for either of you?” asked Logan, not really in the mood to cater to anyone, he just really wanted to talk to Veronica.

“I think Junior here wants a talk with his lady love,” said Cordelia to Spike. 

“I need to clear my head,” mumbled Spike and went upstairs.

Cordelia flourished her hand toward Logan and followed.

“What was that?” asked Veronica, turning to Logan. “She’s always been strange, but…”

“I guess I was telegraphing loudly,” he said.

“You were at that,” she said, crossing toward him, leaning into his side. “What can I do for you, Mr. Echolls?”

“Be serious for me, darling,” he said, leading her to the couch.

“A tall order, but I’ll give it a shot,” she said.

“You come up with anything today?” he asked, forcing casualness into his tone.

“Not much,” she said. “Based on my dream I figured out the city was LA. I was going to run the woman through facial recognition but with Angel and Cordelia recognizing her, I don’t need to do that. You know the rest.”

“Not about what the dream meant.” He shifted to face her better. “Did you find out why it happened at all?”

“And how to get rid of it?” she asked knowingly.

“I guess you are scary smart,” he said.

“Yes, which is why it’s impossible to hide anything from me,” she said.

“No, it’s impossible to hide anything from you because you assume everyone is hiding something from you.”

“They are,” she insisted and the familiar refrain made him smile, but he still had a sour feeling in his stomach.

“You haven’t answered my question, Mars,” he said, poking her. “Evasion is something you can’t pull with me.”

“Marriage has to have a downside somewhere,” she said, then sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to tell you. I can’t explain it and you constantly freaking out about it is not helping my own state of mind.”

“So you’re freaking out about it?” he asked.

“Yes, no, yes,” she said. “Flip a coin based on the moment. I don’t like to freak out, you know that.”

“Well, we already established you’d like to get rid of it,” he prompted.

“Yes, not having dreams about resurrecting vampires would be nice,” she said. “But I’m beginning to think that’s never going to happen to me again.”

“Don’t say that,” he said more sharply than he’d intended.

She looked at him in surprise.

“What has got you so worked up?” she asked. “None of this is new information.”

“Do you want to end up like our friend upstairs?” Logan said. “With third degree burns and claw marks covering your body or going crazy in a hospital somewhere because somebody decided you knew too much or were doing too much good?”

“I’m going to go with the obvious and say no,” said Veronica. “I don’t think my situation is like Cordelia’s.” She hesitated and Logan could physically see her deciding not to share something. “She gets specific visions from a specific someone. We don’t know what I do yet.”

“Well, maybe focus on that part instead of what the dreams mean,” he said.

“Tara is working on that portion,” said Veronica, glaring at him. “And I really don’t think you’re the one who should be getting to make those decisions. This is my head we’re talking about.”

“Oh, sorry, my wife sees the future, but that will never affect me, you’re right,” he said sarcastically.

“Logan, don’t do this,” said Veronica.

He looked down at her, she was ready to fight, but she looked tired and worn out, exactly the way he felt.

“I’m too old for this,” he said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“You’re under thirty,” she said blandly.

“Yeah,” he said. “Pretty sure you need centuries or just be fresh out of high school for this kind of energy.”

“You are an adorable old fogey,” she said. “I appreciate your concern, believe me, I share it. We’ll figure it out. But I think it’s just as important we worry about who’s after Spike and why. Once we know that we could very well possibly know why this happened to me, if not how.”

“Okay,” he said. “I surrender.”

“You won’t freak out again if Cordelia tells you colorful stories?” she asked.

“No promises,” he said.

“Never give in, that’s my Logan,” she said.

“All yours, my little wife,” he said.

She rolled her eyes and tugged him up.

“Come on, it’s been a long day. To bed with you.”

“So long as you come along,” he said.

“Always,” she said.

That single word was enough to allay the majority of his frayed nerves and he let himself be put to bed.

***

Veronica went into the office and shut the door. It was mostly her office because Logan didn’t work from home ever (didn’t work at all if he could help it), and Veronica was constantly bringing things home. The signs that Wesley had been working overtime were everywhere, but the bed Logan had so thoughtfully prepared had gone unused. Veronica looked at it for a moment before settling in at her computer. She didn’t have access to everything on her computer here, she’d done that on purpose, but looking at case files was usually the key to something she’d missed and helped her click pieces into place. Logan had taken Spike into the basement and Veronica was grateful for the peace and quiet.

However, it wasn’t something she was able to enjoy for long because Cordelia shortly stuck her head into the room and then came in.

“Crack the case?” she asked, smiling a little sardonically.

“One needs space to do something like that,” Veronica said, not looking up.

“Your method of coping is unique, I’ll give you that,” said Cordelia, settling herself on the bed and managing to look like a queen on a throne.

“Since I assume you won’t go away until you’ve said whatever you came to say,” Veronica said, turning around, “why don’t you get it over with?”

Cordelia laughed.

“It’s a shame we’ve never spent that much time together. I have a feeling you and I could make Angel’s head explode.”

“And why would you want to make the man you love’s head explode?” Veronica queried.

“For fun,” said Cordelia. “Duh. It’s never good to let Angel sit and stew for too long on anything. He needs to get riled up or he broods for unhealthy periods of time. You’ve got to know what that’s like. Logan has all the signs of a brooder.”

“Logan doesn’t brood…much,” Veronica said uncomfortably.

“No, he’s not nearly as bad,” Cordelia said. “I can see that. Oddly enough, I think he has many of the traits our reckless and snarky friend Spike exhibits, just with a healthy dose of angst and man pain.”

“Oh, please never say anything like that again,” said Veronica, unable to cope with the idea that she’d somehow married Angel and Spike’s love child.

Cordelia laughed again.

“My lips are sealed. No one should have to delve that far into the psyche of others without being paid an obscene hourly fee.”

“But you do all the time,” said Veronica.

“Exactly. So, welcome to the extremely underpaid club, sister.” Cordelia smiled knowingly.

“Is this an initiation rite of some kind?” asked Veronica.

“This is a ‘giving you what I never had’ rite,” said Cordelia. “When I first got the visions, I did not want them. You remember how I got them?”

“Some demon friend of yours or something?” said Veronica.

“Yeah, real classy half-demon, who made Xander look polished on occasion, and that’s saying something. He tells me he’s a demon, kisses me, and then sacrifices himself to save the world,” Cordelia said.

“Sounds familiar.” 

“Right? There should be some kind of club or something around here, but everybody in it would be dead.”

“Except for the ones who came back to life,” remarked Veronica.

“There is that,” said Cordelia. “Anyway, Doyle transferred the visions to me when he died and I was beyond furious at him. Not just because of the head-splitting migraines, though those were no picnic, but because it was too much to deal with all at once. I just wanted to be an actress, not the voice of the Powers.”

“And that didn’t work out for you,” Veronica said unnecessarily.

“Unless you count alternate realities,” Cordelia said wistfully. “But my point is that I tried to give away the visions to every random person I met and nothing stuck. For better or worse, those puppies were mine and they changed who I was. I became a better person, frankly.”

“I’d hate to have met you before,” said Veronica, smiling.

Cordelia cocked an eyebrow at her.

“That one came free.”

“Gee, thanks,” said Veronica.

“I’m just saying,” said Cordelia, “I know what it’s like to suddenly see things and have to deal with the trauma of that. It changes your life. Not quite sure what happened to you, but it sounds like you’ve got an opportunity here. Maybe instead of trying to get rid of it, you should think about what you could do with it.”

“What if it didn’t come from the Powers?” asked Veronica. “What if it came from Wolfram and Hart?”

“Shed that thing like last year’s Prada,” said Cordelia immediately. “Nothing coming from them is a good thing.”

“Great pep talk,” said Veronica.

“It gets better,” said Cordelia, her face softening. “At least you don’t get headaches. That’s telling me right there, something’s different about what you’ve got, but, hey, maybe you won’t have to get demonized.”

“What exactly do you do anyway?” asked Veronica, curious.

“I float,” said Cordelia. “Sometimes I can project a force field or cleanse evil out of something. Mostly, I just have visions that don’t hurt anymore. So far, it’s a good tradeoff.”

“Is that how you’re with Angel?” Veronica said, wondering if she was going too far.

“You mean because of his curse?” asked Cordelia. “Well, that’s a rude thing to ask.”

“So?” Veronica asked, not seeing the problem with that.

“Nothing, just commenting. Yeah, that’s pretty much why. The details are none of your business,” said Cordelia, smiling a Cheshire smile.

“Now that we have that out of the way…” Veronica said, rolling her eyes.

“Just let me know if you need to talk, okay?” said Cordelia. “I want to help you if I can. There’s no need to go through this alone, so don’t do the strong girl thing.”

“Thank you,” said Veronica, oddly touched, realizing now that Cordelia must have stayed behind simply to be there for her if Veronica needed it.

“Now, research is so not my thing,” said Cordelia, “but I can help if you need it. Otherwise, I’m going shopping and you can call my cell.”

“Go ahead,” said Veronica. “I really do work better alone.”

“Don’t overdo,” were Cordelia’s parting words and she vanished again.

Veronica sat for a while contemplating. It wasn’t that Cordelia had really said anything too extraordinary, but Veronica had never thought this would be anything but either temporary or something she would hate. It was still too much to deal with and even if she wanted it, she knew Logan never would. What did it mean for their future?

Still, she felt slightly more hopeful than she had before. Her phone beeped and she looked down. Tara would be coming by later. Veronica smiled and settled in to what she was best at: investigation.


	8. Chapter 8

_He hacked and slashed his way across the cavern, barely conscious of anything but the glory of the fight. It was moments like these that reminded him of how glad he was who he was._

_He found himself back to back with Buffy as she wielded that Scythe with a precision that made him want to rip her clothes off then and there. Little Slayers died left and right, but so did their opponents. He was fiercely proud of the army they’d built over just a few short months and he didn’t so much mourn their deaths as regret the loss of their lives._

_“I hate to sound needy,” said Buffy, ducking under the grab of a Turok-Han._

_“I love it when you do,” he said back._

_“But I am thinking we could really use an amulet powered something about now,” she said._

_Spike looked down, he’d forgotten about the amulet. He’d put it in his pocket for safe keeping as they weren’t really sure how it would use him._

_“Uh, right, amulet,” he said._

_“I can’t believe you forgot about it,” she said, managing to lunge backwards out of claw’s reach and elbow him in the ribs for good measure._

_“Bit busy here, yeah?” he retorted._

_“Too busy to save the world?” she asked._

_“Normally,” he said. “But I do like this world…”_

_She turned and grinned at him and he was struck again by just how beautiful she was and pride swelled up within him._

_“So, save it already,” she said. “Save Minchest Unity.”_

_“It’s Manchester United, love,” he said, and sighed. She would never get it._

_“Whatever,” she said, kicking a vampire away from his face._

_They fought backwards until they were against a wall and all Buffy had to do was watch his front. Spike leaned his favorite broadsword against the wall and plucked the amulet from his pocket and stared down at it for a second._

_“The moment of truth and all that,” he said, preparing to slip it over his head._

_“Last chance to say no,” Buffy said, still fighting._

_“Made my choice, love,” he said, and put on the amulet._

_The sensation started slowly, like water spreading over his body. A warm feeling hovered in his chest, like a glowing ball of fire. The fire shot outward and consumed him utterly. He staggered back under the force of the heat. Light glowed from the amulet and spread out from him in rays. Memories and feelings washed over him and there was something there, just under his skin, tingling and sparking and pricking and he’d never felt so alive._

_The cavern began to shake around them and Spike was frozen where he was, held in place by the weight of the amulet. He heard screaming and shouting from all around, watching in wonder as the light emanating from him shot through the Turok-Han, shredding them to dust all over the cavern._

_Buffy rushed to him, standing in front of him, Scythe resting in her right hand._

_“I can feel it, Buffy,” he said. “My soul.” She reached out and he put his hand out to stop her instinctively. “No, don’t touch.”_

_“Spike, you did it,” she said. “Now we have to go.”_

_He shook his head._

_“Naw, ain’t happening, love. You know that.”_

_“I’m not leaving you here,” she said._

_His attention could only barely focus on her. There were too many sensations flowing from him, too much to experience; a lifetime lost that he was living now. He couldn’t have walked away from this if he tried, but she was always a huge part of anything good in his life and he forced himself to look at her, to see the pain she was feeling and realize what it meant. Tears welled up in her eyes, but her face was steady._

_“I have to do this,” he said._

_She nodded slowly and he hated seeing her lose something else. She reached forward her left hand and pressed it against his upraised hand. His fingers curled around hers as much as he was able. He tried to keep the heat and light escaping from him, but a fire sprang up from their fingers and engulfed their clasped hands._

_Something revelatory happened to her face and she looked at him like she could feel some of what he was feeling. He’d never felt so in sync with her before, so blessed to know her, so in love._

_“I love you,” she said, the evidence of it pouring from her eyes and body language._

_“Yeah, you do,” he said. “Thanks for saying it.”_

_“Which time?” she asked, a hitch in her voice._

_“Every time.”_

_“You are my Champion,” she said._

_“You’re mine,” he answered. A fresh rumble sounded around them and the cavern shook. As she swayed for balance their hands broke apart and his focus sharpened and he could feel the amulet’s power building, wanting to tear apart everything it could. “Now go. I want to see how it ends.”_

_She stepped back, putting the hand he’d been holding to her mouth, and then she ran._

_Spike relaxed once he could no longer see her and the rays of light expanded, getting brighter and brighter. It was the moment to end all moments and nothing he’d ever experienced could top it. For the first time since he’d been turned he no longer felt the call for violence, for evil, just contentment in finally doing the right thing. He wasn’t a fan of destiny, but he felt called and used just for this moment. It was a beautiful feeling and he treasured it until the rocks began to fall all around him and the amulet’s light to fail._

_“School’s out for bloody summer.”_

_Then the burning began._

***

Buffy unpeeled herself from the backseat of Angel’s Plymouth and stretched. It had been a long ride and she’d insisted on the backseat so she could try and get some shuteye. It hadn’t really worked and she’d mostly listened to Wesley talk to himself about his theories for the amulet. It was surprisingly soothing and the drive wasn’t as awkward and tense as she’d thought it would be.

They entered the Hyperion and Buffy turned to face Angel.

“So, where are these Powers of yours?”

“It’s sunrise, Buffy,” said Angel, wincing.

“So, how do you normally get around during the day?” she asked, since it was unlikely Los Angeles had also been constructed by a demonically evil Mayor with pro-vampire tendencies.

“Our sewers aren’t as conveniently located,” said Angel, smiling slightly, “but in a city as big as this, they’re everywhere.”

“Shall we?” she said, gesturing.

“Don’t you want to rest after the trip?” asked Angel.

“No, but I’m guessing you do,” she said.

“I haven’t slept in…a while,” he admitted.

“Fine, power nap for you,” said Buffy. “I’ll grab something to eat. Wes?” she turned to Wesley.

“I’m going to go home for a much needed shower and nap myself,” said Wesley apologetically. “Let me just pop the amulet into the safe and then I’ll get right back to work.”

“Okay,” said Buffy, resigning herself for more waiting.

The thought made her think of Spike and she smiled a little as she assembled a plate from leftover takeout boxes in the fridge. The kitchen was absolutely enormous and she took her food out to the little garden instead of eating in the cavernous darkness.

She continued to think about Spike as she ate, remembering his words to her back at the house before she’d left. He’d proven to her he was still Spike, whether he knew it or not. That thought was reassuring as was the fact that he’d promised to be there when she got back.

She was still adjusting and she was allowed to, but she couldn’t help but feel as if she’d been given a second chance and she’d be a fool not to take it, no matter how difficult it might be.

She wished she’d had a chance to talk to Veronica or Logan or Tara before she’d left. She needed a fresh perspective, which reminded her that she hadn’t updated Dawn yet and her little sister was probably preparing to kill her.

She took out her phone and sure enough, she had a couple of missed calls and several texts. Mostly from Dawn, but Willow had also texted.

She sent a quick response back to Willow, letting her know that they’d found Spike and were trying to figure out why he was back and could she let Giles know?

Buffy swallowed the last of her food and dialed Dawn.

“Where have you been?” asked Dawn. “If this is your idea of how to keep me in school, you’re this close to getting me to ditch my finals and hop a plane.”

“I’m fine,” said Buffy. “Spike…is back.”

“It’s him?” asked Dawn with a hitch in her voice and Buffy was reminded that she was not the only one who had lost him.

“It’s him, Dawnie,” said Buffy. “Don’t know how or why, but he’s back, soul and all.”

“He’s okay?”

“I think so, I’m in LA now, trying to figure out what happened, but he’s back in Neptune.” Angel opened the door to the garden and gestured Buffy inside. Buffy turned back to the phone and cut off Dawn’s line of questioning. “I’m sorry, Dawnie, but I have to go. No one’s in danger, we’re all fine. You should call him and then get back to studying.”

She hung up over Dawn’s squawk of outrage and hurried inside.

“You might be in danger, you know,” said Angel. “The Powers don’t take kindly to questions and every time I go see them I have to find someplace new. Their Conduit to us was severed a few years ago.”

“How do you find them then?” asked Buffy curiously.

“You might have to sing,” said Angel enigmatically and then led the way to the basement and the sewers.

Buffy contemplated that for a second before following him. He led the way through the slimy, echoing sewers and she walked beside him, pondering how familiar it was, but without the same excitement and expectation she used to feel.

He explained more about what they were doing as they walked and by the time they’d arrived at their destination she knew they were going to see Lorne, whom she’d met the last time she was in LA, and who was apparently in the process of reopening his demon karaoke bar, Caritas.

Angel rapped on a back door in a sheltered alley and it was a while before it was opened, locks scraping apart to reveal a green-skinned demon in a silk robe.

He rubbed his red eyes (literally, they were red) and blinked at them.

“Angel cakes, you know I’m always happy to see you, but do you have any idea what time it is?”

“Time for her to sing,” said Angel, pushing his way inside.

Lorne extended his hand to Buffy and she shook it.

“The Slayer herself, well, I can’t deny I’ve been dying to get a read on her for years.”

“Then it’s your lucky day,” said Angel.

Lorne led the way back to the bar, the only place in the room besides the stage that didn’t look like it needed repairs.

“So, what’s your poison?” asked Lorne.

“I guess you don’t have any idea what time it is either,” said Buffy, raising an eyebrow.

“Such a shame,” said Lorne, mixing himself something.

“Lorne, we need answers,” said Angel. “So, no big theatrical number.”

“What would you like to sing?” asked Lorne.

“I don’t like to sing anything,” said Buffy, shivering as remnants of Xander’s summoning spell for the musical theatre portion of hell was brought to mind.

“Let’s bring something up here,” said Lorne, running his finger over the karaoke screen.

Buffy felt extremely uncomfortable, but she squared her shoulders and sang as the song prompted her. She tried not to think about it, but Angel’s face softened as he listened to her and Lorne’s delight was evident in his entire body.

When she finished she folded her arms across her chest and faced them.

“Well?” she asked.

Lorne grinned at her and then became more serious.

“A performance for the ages. You ever want to moonlight here as a fake audience member, you just let me know, sugar.”

“The reading,” Angel said pointedly.

“Right, well, that’s a pickle and no mistake. Wolfram and Hart is definitely up to their old tricks, poaching off the Powers and their play. Or is it vice versa? What exactly I don’t know, but our gal Lilah’s involved and so is that extravagant amulet.”

“Wes wants you to drop by later and look at it,” said Angel.

“What am I, a traveling jeweler?” said Lorne with a long-suffering face.

“Where are the Powers?” asked Angel, ignoring him.

Lorne rattled off an address and then pulled Buffy aside.

“Private words, Angel-mine, head to the back if you would.” Angel grunted and left the room. “Vampires and their eavesdropping,” said Lorne, nudging her.

“Yeah, they’re the worst,” said Buffy. “What did you want to tell me?”

“I just want to make sure you’re not going to run away from this,” said Lorne. “This is a rare chance for you. Not too many people get that second opportunity for true love.”

“You make it sound inevitable,” said Buffy. 

“There’s always a choice in destiny,” said Lorne. “Your job is to figure out what that choice is.”

“It’s…it’s really Spike and he’s back…for good?” asked Buffy reluctantly.

“I can’t make any promises,” said Lorne, winking at her. “But that’s your boy there, you already knew that.”

“Sometimes it’s nice when demons who can predict the future confirm things for you,” said Buffy.

“That’s not how I work,” said Lorne. “Let’s just say that what our dear friends Wolfram and Hart tried to do for evil, you can do for good.”

“Then they brought him back, not the Powers?” asked Buffy.

“Something like that,” said Lorne, taking a sip of his drink. “But when you see the Powers, make sure you ask them about that little blonde friend of yours.”

“Veronica,” Buffy said, already retracing her steps to join Angel.

“Happy hunting,” said Lorne after them. “And now to bed.”

Angel led Buffy back into the sewers and she walked after him, preoccupied with thinking.

“Did he say anything I need to know?” asked Angel finally, pausing in front of a dilapidated looking building just outside of the sewers.

“I think Wolfram and Hart brought Spike back, not the Powers,” said Buffy.

“Good to know,” said Angel, and he bashed a door in, striding forward with a confident swagger.

Buffy raised an eyebrow and followed.

***

Veronica opened the door and ushered Tara inside.

“Hey, thanks for coming,” she said.

“Of course,” said Tara. “How are you holding up?”

“Surprisingly well,” said Veronica. 

“Mac wanted me to let you know she’s circulating the amulet as carefully as she can online to her known circles, but she hasn’t gotten any hits yet,” said Tara.

“Okay,” said Veronica. “Good to know. If the amulet was just created, that’s not surprising.”

She led the way to her office, which she’d left for a few hours to clear her head and eat lunch with everyone. Logan had gone to the butcher the day before and gotten blood for Spike, so everyone had what they needed, but it certainly made mealtimes interesting.

She had noticed Spike hadn’t attempted to do anything weird with his blood and she counted that a bad sign.

“Where are the boys?” asked Tara.

“Spike got a phone call from Dawn,” said Veronica, smiling. “He’s been closeted on the phone with her for hours. Logan took the opportunity to get out.”

“And Cordelia?”

“Shopping last I heard,” Veronica replied.

“So, it’s just us,” said Tara.

“Yup.”

“Well, then I need you to tell me what you’re hiding,” said Tara.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Veronica stiffened.

Tara leaned against the wall and faced Veronica calmly.

“Every time we’ve talked about your dreams, you hesitate and choose your words carefully. Your aura changes.”

“So you’re a lie detector now?” asked Veronica.

“No,” Tara said, shaking her head. “I can just see you’re keeping something back. So can Logan, he texted me and asked me if I knew what it was. I simply deduced the rest, which I learned from my detective friend.”

Veronica smiled slightly even though she was panicking inside.

“It’s just…personal,” she said.

“Then spare me as many details as you can,” said Tara. “I don’t want to push, but this could be important.”

Veronica sighed and sat down, avoiding Tara’s eyes. She supposed it was time, but something had been holding her back, maybe the part of her that didn’t want to admit what was going on. Perhaps Cordelia was right and she was avoiding a potential gift.

“You remember my friend Lilly,” she said softly.

“The one who was murdered,” said Tara.

“Yeah, well, I’ve seen her since then. I’ve dreamt of her before every major event in my life it seems. When I was…investigating her murder there were times I thought she was right there and when I followed her, it led me to clues and things I wouldn’t have considered otherwise. If I hadn’t seen her the day of the bus crash, I would have been on it.”

“That’s pretty big,” said Tara gently.

“Yeah, I avoided thinking about it,” said Veronica. “Didn’t want to think I was crazy. After I met you guys I figured it might have really been her, trying to help me solve her murder, trying to save me.”

“Maybe it was,” said Tara. “Do you know if anyone else saw her?”

Veronica shook her head.

“No one that I know of. She was see-through, like a ghost is supposed to be.”

“But you said you also dreamed about her,” said Tara.

Veronica nodded, wrapping her arms around herself.

“She would say things that helped me put the pieces together. It was just like talking to her again, listening to her insane ideas.”

“When was the last time you dreamt about her?” asked Tara.

“Right before Logan and I decided to have kids,” said Veronica. “We were in my old room and she said…‘big changes coming, Veronica.’ I thought…well, I guess I thought it was the push I needed. So I decided it would be okay to go ahead and have them. Maybe she meant this instead.”

“Maybe she meant both,” said Tara. “Or maybe she didn’t mean anything at all.”

“Come on,” said Veronica. “You think this is something.”

“My opinion isn’t the point,” said Tara. “Veronica, in some way, you’ve always had the sight. What I wonder now is why it’s manifesting so strongly and why Lilly doesn’t appear to be involved since she always has been before.”

“Well, she wasn’t on the bus,” said Veronica, “when I dreamed about those kids.”

“Tell me more,” said Tara, “describe everything you can to me.”

“This is hard,” Veronica admitted.

“I know,” said Tara, offering her a hug.

Veronica leaned forward and accepted Tara’s embrace. It was extremely comforting to simply let go for a moment and accept the support of another human being.

“Thanks,” said Veronica. “Now I’m going to have to tell Logan about Lilly.”

“Only when you’re ready,” said Tara. “I’m sorry to bully it out of you.”

“Yes, I felt very strongly that my lunch money was in danger the whole time,” said Veronica wryly. “Okay, well, let’s get this over with then.”

So for the first time, Veronica didn’t hold anything back and she laid it all out for Tara.

***

When Buffy stepped through the doorway it wasn’t into the dirty and forsaken apartment building she’d been expecting. They were in a cavern, dark and dank, with a rough slab of stone resting in the middle.

“Nice digs,” Buffy said, looking around for signs of life.

“I think I’ve seen this one before,” said Angel. “You’re getting sloppy,” he said to the air.

“Our most sincere apologies, of course,” said a man from behind them. 

When Buffy turned, she saw their doorway had vanished.

The man was tall and gray and wearing a black suit. He looked like pictures of old Watchers Giles had shown her pictures of, down to the moustache.

“I’m sure you’re bleeding on the inside,” said Angel. “I need some answers.”

“How unusual for you,” said the man.

“The amulet they gave me, it’s back, and so is the guy who was wearing it.”

“Naturally,” said the man, shrugging.

“Look, Jeeves, I don’t have a lot of time or patience,” said Buffy, moving forward. Angel held out his arm and she slowed reluctantly.

“That’s also rather natural,” said Jeeves, which Buffy supposed she would have to call him, for lack of any other identification.

“What was the amulet for?” asked Angel.

“To destroy a Hellmouth, just as you requested,” said Jeeves.

Angel looked confused.

“What I asked for was a way to bring down the First.”

“Which was done,” said Jeeves, smiling pleasantly.

“So why is it back?” Angel asked.

“The amulet cannot be destroyed,” said Jeeves. “That was not its purpose.”

“What was its purpose?” asked Buffy.

“I believe I just said that, to destroy a Hellmouth,” Jeeves said slowly, like he was talking to a child.

Buffy’s jaw tightened.

“I’m pretty sure I just said I don’t have a lot of patience, so unless you’d like me to rearrange your face I want you to tell me exactly how the amulet was created, what ulterior motives the big boss had, and why Spike is back. Also, what you did to Veronica.”

“A rather tall order,” said Jeeves. “Should I answer chronologically or alphabetically?”

“Expeditiously,” said Buffy.

Jeeves cocked an eyebrow.

“Excellent vocabulary.”

“Word of the day calendar,” said Buffy.

Angel looked at her, confused, but she refused to validate the look. She was enjoying saying that to people.

“The amulet was created on the vampire with a soul’s request,” said Jeeves, speaking placidly and without emotion. “It was designed to destroy a Hellmouth and restore order, bestowing a soul, righting the balances. That was our entire purpose.”

“Then why is Spike back?” Angel asked, thankfully not mentioning anything about Wolfram and Hart.

“There are other interested parties,” said Jeeves. “The amulet is rather unique, you see. It was not meant for secondary use.”

“What happens if it is used again?” asked Buffy.

“The good it had done would be undone,” said Jeeves. “Something like that anyway. I really couldn’t be sure of the particulars. We didn’t reverse-engineer the process, you see.”

“So someone else brought Spike back to use the amulet again?” asked Angel. “Why bring him back if all they want is the amulet?”

“The amulet was designed to imprint itself upon its wearer,” said Jeeves. “Effectively, it is a failsafe to be sure the amulet could not be used for wanton destruction. We frown upon that sort of thing.”

“So no one can use the amulet but Spike,” said Buffy, working it out. “So someone had to bring him back to get their hands on its powers.”

“By someone I assume you mean Wolfram and Hart,” said Jeeves lightly. “Really rather obvious, I should think.”

“None of this explains Veronica’s dreams,” said Buffy.

Jeeves smiled and extended a hand.

“Pray, go on. I’m afraid I would need more information before I could fully answer your question as…expeditiously as you would like.”

Buffy narrowed her eyes and took a step forward before stopping herself. Glancing up, she saw Angel was just as annoyed as she was.

“She’s not a Slayer, she doesn’t have visions, she never had the sight before,” said Angel. “She dreams Spike came back and it happens. You tell us what that means.”

“Whatever her latent abilities and hidden talents may be, this Veronica,” said Jeeves, “she appears to be a stroke of good fortune, wouldn’t you say? How else would you have known to go to the cavern first?”

“If you wanted us to know about it,” said Angel, “why not just send Cordelia a vision? Isn’t she supposed to be my link to the Powers?”

“That would imply this was about you,” said Jeeves. “Undoubtedly a stolid Champion for the people, but not the only one.”

“Every Champion has to have their own person with visions?” Angel asked incredulously. “What’s wrong with a little outsourcing?”

“That doesn’t make sense,” said Buffy. “You imply the Powers sent the dream to Veronica to warn us about what Wolfram and Hart was going to do, but if Wolfram and Hart were the ones who brought Spike back then how come it only happened once we’d gone to the cavern and found the amulet which the Powers told us to do? Was Wolfram and Hart the ones there before us, casting dark magic? If so, how come they didn’t bring Spike back first?”

“Time is such a hard construct to understand, isn’t it?” said Jeeves condescendingly. “What a pity to be mired down in it.”

“What the hell does that mean?” asked Angel.

“It means that just because something did not happen in the order that makes sense to you does not mean it happened for the reasons you think it did,” said Jeeves and vanished.

“I hate it when he does that,” Angel grumbled.

Buffy shook her head and tried to clear her thoughts. She glanced around her.

“How do we get out of here?” she asked.

Angel gestured behind them.

“Door’s back.”

They left the way they came and descended into the sewers once more. 

Buffy thought as they walked, trying to make sense of what the faux manservant had told her.

She thought she had a better idea of what Spike had been brought back for and maybe why Veronica had started dreaming. It was all a bit too simultaneous for her, but then again, she wasn’t exactly anything but a linear being.

She and Angel discussed it a little bit, but they were mostly wrapped up in their own thoughts.

They met Wes in the lobby of the Hyperion where he was returning, freshly shaven.

“I slept rather longer than I’d planned,” said Wes. “Fred let me know she and Gunn were out helping some of his friends so we have the place to ourselves.”

He crossed to the office and knelt down to unlock the safe.

Buffy and Angel stopped inside the doorway.

“I have to call home,” said Buffy. “Were you going to confront Wolfram and Hart?”

“Yeah,” said Angel. “I’ll pay Lilah a little visit. I don’t want to tip our hand too early though. It wouldn’t surprise me if they already knew you were here, but maybe you should stay here while I talk to her.”

“I could actually use some sleep,” said Buffy.

A startled cry from behind them made them turn.

Wesley was standing, looking chagrined.

“The amulet is gone.”


	9. Chapter 9

When Spike initially picked up the phone he’d been hesitant to talk to anyone. After Buffy had left with Angel his focus on reality had wavered again, which had lasted the night, with him crouched on Buffy’s bed, frantically breathing in her scent and hating this brand new unlife.

The hatred soon brought about anger and the conviction that he was not about to let a little thing like a soul beat him. He’d had one before and he’d have one again and if William wanted to cower in a corner because of what a bad man he’d been, well, Spike would let him. He just wouldn’t participate any longer.

Spike had gotten up, had not wanted a smoke, which was a bad sign, and had been relieved when Logan took him down to the basement and asked him to spar.

It was somewhat refreshing, letting his body take over his mind and remind him of the things he could do, the way he felt while he was fighting. He didn’t have to worry about what fresh memories his new soul would dredge up for him to think about.

Logan let him just work it out and Spike appreciated that, even though he could sense waves of worry coming off the other man. That he just couldn’t focus on, so he let it go, where once he would have pounced on it. Still, he actually had fun and he heartily thanked Logan when they were finished. Logan was breathing hard, covered in sweat, and Spike shrugged his coat back on, looking as if he had simply strolled around the room.

“I guess you didn’t forget after all,” said Logan.

“Body remembers everything,” Spike said with a leer.

Logan shuddered and looked away.

“Now that’s Spike. Well, my suggestive friend, shall we lunch and see what the girls are up to?”

“Sure,” said Spike, shrugging.

The meal was quiet, Veronica hurrying back to hole up in her office after only a brief bite and Cordelia off doing goodness knows what.

Then the phone rang.

Logan picked it up and his face lightened slightly. Spike could hear a familiar sounding voice on the other end and part of him froze and the other part lurched happily.

“That is for you,” Logan said, handing Spike the phone.

“ ‘Lo,” he said, shooting for casual.

“Let’s just say you’re way overdue on helping me with my anthropology paper,” said Dawn.

Some fear broke inside of Spike and he chuckled.

“Sorry about that, Nibblet. Got a bit held up being dead.”

“You’re always dead, that’s no excuse,” she reprimanded.

“Well, hard to argue with that,” he said.

“No one wins arguments with me,” she said. “So there.”

“Nothing like a winning comeback,” said Spike, shifting the phone to a more comfortable spot and putting his legs up on the table.

Logan gave him a look of approval and vanished from the room.

Spike settled into the most relaxed he’d been since he got back while Dawn chattered away about school and her ambitions and Xander and Anya’s new kid and Willow’s coven and Giles and his inability to change.

She didn’t question him, at least not very much, for which he was grateful. She peppered bits of her news with tidbits about Buffy and he soaked them in. But soon it was down to the end and he knew the part when he’d have to talk about him was coming up.

“I just hung up with Buffy,” Dawn finally said.

“Yeah?” Spike said, trying not to sound too interested.

“She sounded like she was in a hurry and didn’t do the sisterly dish that I was hoping for,” said Dawn. “Sorry, but that makes you it. Tag.”

“Not much to say,” said Spike. “I don’t know what happened. I was dying, and then I wasn’t. A bit of a letdown for a story.”

“You can do better than that,” said Dawn. “I mean it, spill.”

Spike tried to wrap his thoughts together. He had been having difficulties with that, but if anyone could help him straighten out those thoughts, it was probably Dawn since Veronica hadn’t really been around.

So he laid it out for her, coming back and finding out it was five years later, feeling guilt for the first time in over a hundred years, not knowing why he was back, and trying desperately to hold on to his sanity.

“I got a lot of mess in here,” he finished. “Not really liking the direction.”

“It’s a lot,” said Dawn. “In fact, I think it’s probably too much.”

“That what you’re applying that education to?” Spike laughed.

“I’m going for levity,” said Dawn. “Agreeing with you sincerely will only bring out the brooding genetics grossly passed down to you through bloodsucking.”

“Bloody shut your mouth,” said Spike, not able to stop a smile though.

“Not ever going to happen,” said Dawn.

“What’s your best advice then?” said Spike. “Give it to us straight, luv.”

“I know how much you love waiting,” said Dawn thoughtfully.

“Not even sarcastically,” he said.

“Talking then,” she said. “Straight up, pouring out the feelings, not holding anything back, building up friendships with everyone, bonding, talking.”

“I like talking,” said Spike. “Especially bragging.”

“Do some of that then,” said Dawn. “You saved the world. Just be prepared for people who know you to shoot that down like the crap it is.”

“You’re the most inspiring,” said Spike.

“Duh,” said Dawn. “Now, do I need to come down there? Because I’m gonna do that anyway, but I just have a few more finals.”

“Finish it,” said Spike firmly. “I didn’t spend an entire summer slogging through your homework so you could fail college.”

“Yeah, it’s all about you,” said Dawn. “I’ll go study. Seriously, call me if you need me though. Sometimes it takes Buffy a long time to process, you know that better than anyone. She really missed you, Spike. So did I.”

“Would’ve missed you,” said Spike, shrugging even though she couldn’t see him.

“I really love you,” said Dawn. “You’re all the male relatives apart from father I never had.”

“So I’m grandad?” asked Spike.

“You’re old enough to be,” she said cheerfully. “Love you, bye!”

Spike looked at the phone for a second, trying to wrap his head around the call. A very good call. He was smiling when Veronica popped her head in the door.

“Buffy called, somebody took the amulet,” she said.

Well, that wiped the smile right off.

***

Buffy was feeling strangely calm when she and Angel knocked on a woman’s door.

When it opened a smug looking smile spread across the woman’s face.

“I can’t say I didn’t expect you,” Lilah said, leaning just inside the door.

“Then you know why I’m here, so let’s cut to the chase,” said Angel. “I’d really like to get my lawyer interrogation quota up.”

“Which is partly why I stayed home today,” said Lilah. “It’s so much easier being interrogated when you’re not trying to strangle me.”

“I have never strangled…her,” said Angel, looking sideways at Buffy.

She rolled her eyes and stepped into the room.

“Yeah, so, I’m gonna actually cut to the chase here. Angel can’t come in, I can. The name’s Buffy, you already knew that, I’m what he has nightmares about, so tell me where the amulet is.”

Lilah’s eyes tightened for a moment but she simply walked away from the door and sat down on the couch, her black suit somehow crisp and perfect.

“The infamous ex,” said Lilah. “Well, at least it’s not Darla.”

Angel glared and looked like he’d love to push his way into the room if he could.

“As complicated and fun as Angel’s history is,” said Buffy, leaning on the couch arm over Lilah, “I don’t have time for it right now. Answer the question.”

“Do you honestly think that I got where I am today by spilling my company’s alleged secrets?” asked Lilah, a smirk on her face.

“It’s pretty much a weekly dance from what Angel tells me,” Buffy said innocently.

Lilah’s smile thinned.

“It’s easy to feel like you have the upper hand when all you use is brute force,” she said. “Yet, somehow we’re all still here, even I’m here, and you’re not getting anything out of me today.”

“I’m told I’m very persuasive,” said Buffy. “I think it’s the hair.”

“I bet it is,” said Lilah, leaning back. “That and the super strength. Yet, it won’t work on me and before you break out the physical intimidation, I’d just like to point out one tiny problem with your reasoning.”

“By all means,” said Buffy, an inner feeling of annoyance deepening.

“If, as you suggest, Angel and I do a weekly dance of me confessing all of Wolfram and Hart’s sins, why on earth do you think they’d entrust something like this amulet to Angel’s go to gal?”

“Because they’re so evil they’re really dumb?” suggested Buffy lamely.

“You’re always knee deep in everything, Lilah,” said Angel. “You can’t fool me.”

“Come in, Angel,” said Lilah, a plastered look of confidence on her face. She stood up as he practically blurred through the door, towering over her. “You see,” she said, her voice slightly quivering. “I don’t have anything, I don’t know anything. Plausible deniability is a pretty basic lawyer trick. You really need to get to know some new people.”

Angel glared at her until Buffy thought his forehead was going to fall off. She studied Lilah’s face and while she found traces of smugness, fear, and vicious delight, she didn’t see the hint of a lie.

Angel finally looked away and sighed, then turned to Buffy, gesturing to the door.

“You might want to disinvite him,” Buffy said confidentially to Lilah. “He gets cranky when he doesn’t get his way.”

Angel shot her a glower, but left without a word. Lilah gave Buffy a short nod and then shut the door behind her.

“Was that necessary?” said Angel.

“What, it’s true!” said Buffy. “So, you think she was telling the truth.”

“Unfortunately, yes,” said Angel. “She folds under fear so easily, even if she is slipperier than a blood-soaked body.”

“You would know,” said Buffy, slightly impressed he was willing to even say that in front of her. Maybe it was Cordelia’s influence. “So what’s next, you make some new friends?”

“Eventually,” said Angel. “I think we should go back to Neptune.”

“Agreed,” said Buffy. “The Powers told us enough, even if it was in a very annoying way. I don’t think I should leave Spike alone.”

“Wolfram and Hart is playing this one close to the vest,” said Angel. “Lilah’s involved, Lorne said so, so did Cordelia’s vision and Veronica’s dream, yet she clearly doesn’t know anything yet. Wolfram and Hart is being too smart. They’re usually quite showy with their evil, so I’m a bit concerned.”

“Check, concerned about evil,” said Buffy, suddenly feeling quite tired. “This time I’m really sleeping in the car.”

“Wes can drive,” said Angel, looking just as worn.

Buffy nodded and they made their way back to the hotel in silence, a slight ping of joy filling her when she realized that for the first time in five years, she was going back to a place where Spike was and this time, she knew he was really there and that it was really him.

***

Logan prepared for the second big meeting at his house since this had all started. He wasn’t quite sure how they’d become the headquarters of this latest potential apocalypse, but at least it was saving him gas money.

He hung up the phone after calling his assistant and finished putting away the groceries. Veronica had been knee deep in research with Mac for hours. Mac had finally gone home, but now Buffy, Angel, and Wesley were due back any minute. Tara had arrived a few minutes before and was helping him in the kitchen.

“You gonna tell me what Veronica said or do I have to charm it out of you?” he asked, going for flirtatious and charming rather than brooding and emotionally panicked.

“I give up. You know the manly charm always does me in,” said Tara.

Logan shrugged and winked at her.

“Can’t help but try.”

Tara smiled and turned to face him as he hopped up on the counter.

“She really is very much in love with you, you know?” Tara said. “I’ve never known Veronica when she wasn’t with you, but there’s this look in her eyes when she sees you that I never see any other time. Like…she’s actually comfortable, not restless, not trying to figure something out.”

Logan wanted to well up suddenly, but contained himself.

“She never has to be anything other than herself with me,” he said. “All I ask is that she doesn’t run.”

“I think I’m here to stay,” said Veronica wryly, coming into the kitchen.

Logan jumped a little. He was usually the stealthier of the two of them, but she had definitely learned how to be quiet on long stakeouts and used that to her advantage whenever she could. Plus, he might have been feeling slightly guilty about trying to wheedle information out of Tara.

“My darling wife,” he said, planting a kiss on her brow, which was so conveniently within reach with him on the counter.

“Don’t worry,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I have not come with the wrath of the ages to rain fire down upon you. We can do all that later.”

“Such a tease,” said Logan and hopped off the counter.

Tara watched them with a fond smile on her face.

“What’s next?” she asked.

“They just pulled up,” said Veronica. “Let’s face the music.”

“Only if we can dance,” said Logan, leading the way.

Spike and Cordelia were already in the living room, having some kind of spirited argument about predicting the future and his ex Drusilla, so it was to a packed room that Buffy, Angel, and Wesley returned.

Logan listened with extreme interest while Buffy and Angel explained their conversations with Lilah and the Powers That Be’s lackey. He noticed that Spike got more and more uncomfortable the more they spoke.

“Let me suss this out,” Spike said. “I’m resting in peace after bloody saving the world and then the Evil League of Lawyers decide they want my shiny bauble and bring me back, but the Powers That Ruin Lives decided I was too good an opportunity to waste and get the white hats to do it first and now both sides are gunning for my sodding connection to a piece of jewelry even Dru wouldn’t wear voluntarily?”

“About sums it up,” said Angel. 

“You were brought back for a reason,” said Wesley. “Some higher purpose or calling, to help save the world.”

“Well, who gave them the bloody right to do that?” said Spike.

Buffy gave him a sharp glance and Logan narrowed his eyes at the look of pain on her face.

She shrugged it off and addressed the room at large. 

“Whatever, we know the amulet and Spike are important to Wolfram and Hart’s plans and that they’re the ones who enhanced Veronica’s dreams.” She turned to Veronica. “I’m sorry that I couldn’t get more information. Hopefully you and Tara have figured out some more?”

“Not much,” said Veronica, shifting uncomfortably. “We had a good breakthrough talk, but still need to sift some data around to determine if this is permanent and find the exact origin. But knowing the Powers power-started this sudden influx of dreams definitely gives us a starting point.”

Logan made a mental note to ask her exactly what the breakthrough was and returned his concentration to the conversation.

“This is fascinating and all that,” said Cordelia. “I can’t wait to see what Spike and his diamond do to enhance the quality of my life with their new higher purpose. Yet, I find myself asking the obvious question of what exactly it is we’re supposed to do about Wolfram and Hart?”

“Yes, that’s important,” said Angel, glancing sideways at Spike. “Wolfram and Hart always have an angle and we don’t know it. Since they’ve decided to move on…to Spike,” he said it with a slightly bitter tone and Logan wondered if he even realized how he sounded, “we need to figure it out.”

“So, how and where?” asked Logan.

“I think Spike needs to stay away from LA,” said Buffy.

“I’ll just be a kept man, shall I?” said Spike in a sullen tone.

“You’ll be a safe man,” retorted Buffy. “None of your harebrained ‘run off into the danger because you got bored’ plans.”

“Yes, Slayer,” Spike said with as much insolence as Logan had ever heard come out of someone’s mouth.

“Angel is the best person to keep track of Wolfram and Hart,” said Cordelia. “We’ll go back home and see what we can find out.”

“I doubt I’ll find anything, but I’ll keep researching,” said Wesley.

“So will Veronica and I,” said Tara. “Other than that, I think we have to wait until we know more.”

Logan and Spike shared identical looks of annoyance across the room.

“But I’m not leaving yet,” said Cordelia. “You guys just got here. We’ll stay the night and then leave, is that okay?” she asked, turning to Veronica.

“Of course,” said Veronica. “You know where your rooms are.”

“Then let’s all turn in and stop obsessing over our separate issues,” said Cordelia, almost pushing Angel in front of her.

Logan had to hide a smile. The woman unnerved him, but the way she handled Angel was nothing short of genius. Especially considering how grumpy Angel looked about all the attention being lavished on Spike.

Of course, Logan had his own axe to grind with the situation they were now facing. He watched as everyone dispersed and Veronica and Tara lingered at the doorway before Tara left for home. After waving goodbye at him, Tara left and Logan approached Veronica, determined not to pry or freak out.

“Care for some pillow talk?” he asked, leaning against the doorjamb.

***

Veronica had found that finally confessing to someone about Lilly was actually quite freeing. It meant she wasn’t spending all of her mental power trying to convince herself it didn’t mean anything.

Once she and Tara had talked, Tara had done another reading on her and said she thought she’d know more once she looked in one of her books, which she’d been doing before the others got back.

Now that Buffy was here and had brought the information about the Powers, Veronica suddenly felt very calm.

She walked Tara to the door and didn’t even need to ask.

“This is your gift,” said Tara warmly. “Your abilities are inherent within you, I’m sure of it. It was a small gift, ignored perhaps in favor of your other more naturally acquired abilities, but something likely triggered in danger and deep emotion. It was just there when you needed it, shaped by one of your strongest memories of sadness and fondest memories of joy.” Veronica blinked and tried to keep back a tear. That was one of the best descriptions of Lilly she’d ever heard. “Then you were chosen,” continued Tara. “The Powers enhanced that gift inside of you. That’s the only thing that makes sense.”

“Lucky me,” said Veronica, feeling peace about only one particular aspect of that thought.

“Try not to think about it tonight,” said Tara and hugged her. “It will all be there come the morning and you’ve got all of us on your side. The Powers can’t take away what’s inside of you and you can control this.”

“Do you promise?” asked Veronica.

“I never make promises,” said Tara sadly, “they’re too easy to break.”

“Good night,” said Veronica.

Tara waved.

She stood and watched Tara go before feeling more than seeing Logan come up behind her and lean against the doorjamb.

“Care for some pillow talk?”

She turned around and studied him, a picture of casual interest, and all hers. She tried to process what she was feeling, but everything was a bit too much. What she held on to in the cacophony of emotion was that Lilly, however much Lilly might be her own power manifesting itself, was her protector. The only person who loved and knew Lilly like she did was Logan.

“We have to talk about Lilly,” said Veronica.

Logan looked very confused and she didn’t blame him, but she took his hand and took him upstairs to their bedroom.

There was a small window seat in the room and Veronica had fallen in love with it the first time she saw it. It was one of the main reasons why she’d wanted this house in particular. She’d pictured many hours there, lightly working on cases or having talks like this one.

She sat Logan down and she wanted to curl up against his chest and turn the lights off and see if they could see stars outside the glow of the street lamps like they sometimes did, but instead she placed her back against the opposite wall and faced him with a small smile on her face.

“What’s going on, Veronica?” asked Logan, much more gently than he normally would.

She shook her head and tried to figure out what she wanted to say.

“I’ve always been this,” she finally said. “I’ve always seen the future or pieces of it. I just didn’t know that’s what it was.”

“How?” he asked. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I never told anyone,” she said. “I didn’t know how. It was just…my personal thing, you know?” He nodded, but was clearly still waiting for more. “After Lilly…died, I saw her,” she said, picking at her sleeve. “I saw her at her house and before the bus crash and I dreamt about her the night your d- Aaron tried to kill me. I dreamt about her a lot over the years and she’d always tell me things, help me piece together what I was missing on a case, or just talk to me. After we met Buffy I figured she was really there and it wasn’t just me being crazy, but I thought it was all about Lilly, not about me. I’ve dreamed other things, too, and Tara says she’s really sure that this is all me, that I’ve always had this gift.”

“Makes sense,” Logan said, resting his hand on her ankle, but not moving any closer to her.

“So the Powers took what I had and enhanced it,” said Veronica. “This is me; this is who I am, and who I’ll always be.”

“I still don’t know what that means,” said Logan. “Can you control it, force it, channel it? What is it?”

“I’ll work on that piece,” said Veronica, forcing a smile. “I feel…okay though.”

“Good,” said Logan.

“Do you feel okay?” she asked, looking at him.

“I don’t know,” he said. “I don’t really know anything. I need you to talk to me, I’m glad you are.”

“I know,” she said, breathing out a sigh. “Honestly, this was just something I was never going to tell anyone ever. It was so private, my best friend keeping me safe from beyond the grave.”

“How did she look?” asked Logan and Veronica looked up at the crack in his voice. 

He had his wounded puppy dog look on and she knew it wasn’t on purpose. When Logan wanted to fake a wounded look he could never quite hide the impish part of his eyes, but when he was crushed, she’d never known anyone who could look that wrecked. It made her want to cry every time.

“She was good,” said Veronica. “Always. Just being Lilly in all the ways that Lilly could be Lilly.” He laughed slightly. “I know that this is a good thing,” she said. “Because even if my powers decided to give me Lilly to help me predict the future, it was Lilly, and I trust that.”

“That doesn’t sound very Veronica,” he said, teasing coming back into his tone.

“I’m allowed to have layers,” said Veronica, scooting toward him like she’d wanted to do from the beginning.

He welcomed her into the circle of his arms and she took a moment to bask in the comfort of his steady breathing. There was nothing quite like hearing someone’s heartbeat to make you feel safe.

“So, where do you want to go from here?” he asked.

“Logan, I feel okay about having these powers,” she said, and wondered if she could voice her fears properly. “I’m not okay with the Powers using me as their conduit to do…whatever. But can we just focus on the okay with it part for tonight?”

“I’ve always been a sucker for a woman with superpowers,” he said in response, lightly kissing the back of her head. “My wife, the superhero. We’re going to have to give you a name, you realize?”

“Don’t you dare,” she said, smiling.

“Ah, ah,” he said. “The hero never gets to choose, it’s part of the burden. Now…let me see, Sibylline? No, The Illimitable Detective.”

Veronica tried to quell her laugh as he named off ridiculous things into the night, clinging to the sound of his voice and the rhythm of his breathing before facing what came next.

***

Spike found himself a bit on edge now that Buffy and Angel had figured out why he was back. After all, he’d done the whole Champion saving the world bit, wasn’t he entitled to some kind of peace or at least a choice in what happened next? But then again, in some ways, being Spike had never really been about choice. He was a patchwork man and always had been; full of ideas and books and other people’s conceptions, rebelling against his past, but always finding himself smack dab in the middle of it anyway.

He just didn’t like the idea of someone deciding his future and what kind of path he would have. Yes, he’d decided to stop being actively evil and to stay with Buffy and to be her Champion and receive a soul and stay in the Hellmouth as it collapsed around him…but none of that gave any Higher Power or Lower Evil the right to pop him in and out of existence and time like he was their puppet.

Buffy watched him out of the corner of her eye and he knew he should be giving her some kind of reassurance about how he was feeling but he felt instead rather like picking a fight. A bit of violent sparring perhaps, yet somehow the idea also made him feel a bit sick. The influence of the soul, that. The rough and tumble would have given him his jollies before, but now the idea of hurting anything was repugnant to some part of him that was more prevalent than before. That angered him because violence and the adrenaline rush that came with it was the blood that ran through his veins.

“I’m not gonna fall apart, Buffy, you can stop looking at me like that,” he said.

“I wasn’t aware I was looking at you at all,” she said.

“Right, must be some other bloke who’s recently come back from bleeding death,” he said.

“I take it you’re not too thrilled about that,” she said carefully and he hated her tact. She was supposed to tell him the truth bluntly.

“What I do is nobody’s business but mine,” he said, pacing a little.

“Interesting viewpoint,” she said. “Maybe you’ve actually been given a chance to do something else, Spike; did you ever try to look at it like that?”

“That what you thought?” he said, looking harshly at her. “When you got back I bet the first thought was how bloody happy you were to be ripped out of heaven.”

She didn’t flinch but he could hear her heart start to beat faster.

“You’re well aware of what I was thinking then,” she said quietly. “But our circumstances are a bit different unless there’s something you’re not telling me.”

“I always tell the truth,” he said, flinging it at her.

“Now there’s a lie,” she said, walking closer and mimicking his voice badly. “ ‘What can I tell you, baby? I’ve always been bad.’ Ring any bells?”

“With you,” he said. “When I’m with you, there’s no lies. But it’s not easy coming back, you know that.”

“Which is why I can help you,” she said. “No one else can, not even Angel.”

Spike stiffened at the name and the reminder.

“I don’t want your pity,” he said. 

“I wanted your comfort,” she said. “That’s all I’m trying to give you. What happened while I was gone? I thought you said…”

“Well, I didn’t have all the facts,” he said. “Now that I do, I still don’t know anything. I’m walking in a world where everyone else knows their place.”

“Your place is with me,” she said finally. “Always, it’s with me.”

He stopped pacing and tried to find an irrational response to that, but none of the warring parts inside would let him. There was something so very captivating about her in her vulnerability that made him both swell with pride and want to weep from shame.

“Right,” he said. “Sorry, love. In fact there’s no place I’d rather be, except it’s just a bit hard to fall back into place until I know who I am.”

“No one’s rushing for a finish line here,” she said. “We have time now.”

“Mayhap,” he said. “Still, it’s weird, innit? Talking to a dead man who’s a bit more dead than usual.”

“Our relationship has never been what anyone would call normal,” she said, smiling slightly. “Anyway, it turns out normality is underwhelming.”

He nodded and took a step toward her, taking her hand and pressing it against his chest for a moment.

“Gotta clear my head, yeah?”

She frowned, but then nodded.

“I’ll be waiting for you in my room,” she said.

Spike strode past her and headed outside where he stood on the porch and for the first time since he’d been back wanted a smoke.

Seeing as how he didn’t have any and he knew none were in the house, he thought he’d go and see if he could get some.

He walked down the driveway, unfamiliar with the exact area, but he’d been in Neptune enough to know the main layout. He patted down his pockets and remembered he didn’t have any money. With a smirk he decided he’d try a bit of sleight of hand, feeling pricks of guilt, but in the long run, what was a pack of cigarettes?

He hadn’t gone far when he had the sensation he was being watched. It was a coldly familiar sensation that he wasn’t sure he wanted to remember. He kept walking, senses on high alert, but he didn’t hear or see anything. He just kept feeling like something was wrong.

He began looking for some kind of weapon, but the kind of neighborhood Veronica and Logan lived in didn’t really lend itself to handy steel pipes or long planks of wood.

There was a rough hissing sound from his left and Spike instinctively ducked. A cold scaly hand clipped his shoulder and Spike twisted to the right. A demon had come up to him, scaled and reptilian, humanoid in form. It was dressed in black leather and carried a long, hard, baton-looking cyclical shape in its hand.

“Was I bothering you, mate?” asked Spike.

“You will come with me,” said the demon, the voice raspy and echoing.

“My mum told me something about not going off with strangers,” said Spike. “Sure, I ignored her once and got turned into a vampire in an alley, but fool me twice and all that.”

A part of him was starting to get excited and he bounced a little on his feet.

“You will come,” said the demon, lunging at him again.

It was fast and Spike just barely dodged the baton aimed at his skull. He pitched forward, driving his shoulder into the demon and knocking it backwards. Its back hit a tree with a thud and Spike used the momentary pain to drive an elbow into its face.

It pulled the baton back from behind Spike and jammed his shoulder, tugging him closer to the demon, who reached his other hand to try and get it around Spike’s neck.

Spike twisted to the ground and punched the demon’s midsection before backing away for some metaphorical breathing room.

The demon hissed and came at him again, Spike trading punches and dodging blows, amazing to see how easily this was coming back to him. Pretty soon he was fully enjoying himself, any bits of guilt he might have felt being exorcised in the glory of beating something that was doing wrong.

Still, the demon was strong and fast and clever, using the area around them as well as its own weapon to leave Spike with some rather fantastic bruises. It backed Spike into a corner of a fence and began to rain heavy and fast blows, then lunged back for a hard punch that would leave Spike disoriented enough to capture. Spike jumped as far upward as he possibly could and grabbed hold of the top of the fence above him. He used his feet, kicking the demon several times before spring boarding off the fence and taking off running.

He was so close to the house that it didn’t take him long to make the driveway. The demon was following close behind him, but Spike didn’t want to make too much noise so he didn’t try to alert anyone. Luckily, it was trash day and Spike grabbed the cover off of Veronica and Logan’s trash bin and smashed it over the demon’s head. It cracked and broke apart like the plastic it was and Spike looked at it in disgust before kicking the demon in the ribs.

The porch light behind them went on and Buffy and Angel ran out of the house. The demon hissed and used the distraction to kick Spike in the face and run down the street, hopping fences. Angel ran after it while Buffy stopped where Spike was bent over, hands on his knees.

“Are you all right?” she asked.

“Just keen,” he said, spitting out some blood.

Angel came back just then and stopped Buffy from heading out after him.

“It got away,” he said. “But that was a Kov’leth, they’re bounty hunters.”

“I’d say Wolfram and Hart wants you back,” said Buffy. “Needy lawyers.”

Spike couldn’t help but agree with her.


	10. Chapter 10

_Veronica was inside the building again, wandering through the halls. There were portraits on the walls but no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t retain the images. People dressed in business clothes with no faces passed by her, paying her no attention, even when she tried to talk to them. They carried folders in their arms and the women’s heels clacked loudly on the tiled floor._

_There were voices ahead of her and she followed the sounds, wondering if this particular hallway was ever going to end._

_The sounds grew louder and when she finally turned a corner she found a cavernous room she’d seen once before - the lobby of the hotel Angel worked out of._

_Mac and Tara were in front of her, Mac busily typing away on a laptop. When Veronica peered over her shoulder all she saw was gibberish. Tara was making notes from a book, also gibberish._

_Buffy and Spike were standing by the counter and Veronica moved closer to hear what they were saying._

_“About time you got here, Veronica,” said Lilly’s voice from behind her._

_Veronica turned to see Lilly dressed in her cheerleader’s outfit, lounging on the circled cushions in the middle of the room._

_“Lilly,” she said, walking toward her. “You’re here again.”_

_“As if I ever left,” said Lilly. “Pfft, Veronica. You’ve got to start putting pieces together.”_

_“What’s that supposed to mean?” asked Veronica._

_She didn’t have as much patience for Lilly’s remarks as she used to._

_“Who you are,” said Lilly, sitting up. “Why didn’t you ask someone about me years ago?”_

_“I was afraid of what you were,” said Veronica. “Then I didn’t care, I just wanted to keep you to myself.”_

_“This amount of awesome was not meant to be kept in a box,” Lilly said, waving her hand to include the entirety of her form. “Besides, I’m not really here.”_

_“Because I made you up,” said Veronica._

_“Even you could only imagine half of me,” said Lilly. “But now I get to run and play, like the other kids.”_

_“Speaking of kids,” said Veronica._

_Lilly shook her head._

_“Don’t go there just yet,” she said._

_“What do you mean?” asked Veronica._

_Behind her Spike screamed._

***

Logan watched Veronica sleep for a minute or two. She’d fallen asleep on the window seat the night before and he’d moved her over to the bed. She was a fairly sound sleeper for someone so used to being alert to her surroundings. He’d fallen asleep rather quickly himself and then had woken up too early. He’d gotten some coffee going and then went out to pull in the garbage cans. What he’d found was a destroyed bin lid and trash scattered from where scavengers had helped themselves to the contents of the bin. At least the recycling tub was okay.

He came back inside to find Buffy rummaging in the cupboards.

“Care to tell me about the party you threw last night?” he asked.

Buffy winced as she faced him.

“Sorry, I totally meant to clean that, but I was fixing Spike up. Bounty hunter came after him outside last night.”

“Is he okay?” asked Logan.

She nodded.

“He held his own pretty well; I’d say he’s back in fighting form.”

“Huzzah for small favors,” said Logan. “You up?”

“No,” said Buffy, stifling a yawn. “I am officially going back to bed once I find some aspirin.”

Logan got it for her and then headed back to the bedroom where Veronica was still sleeping and sat up in bed, going over some reports, but mostly thinking.

What Veronica had told him the night before was nothing short of mind blowing, but it made way too much sense when he thought about the past for him to disbelieve her. For the most part he thought about the conviction she appeared to have that this was a gift and was something she’d always had.

He couldn’t deny that the thought scared him. A Veronica with the ability to sense the future was more frightening than just a Veronica who never let the truth rest. The problem was, apparently she’d always been the former. He didn’t get to divide the two halves of her in his mind.

He could divide himself in half, the Logan before Sunnydale and the Logan afterward. There were some bad moments in either half, but on the whole, he’d much rather be the Logan he was now. He was also much less likely to have secrets for Veronica to ferret out and pin him to the wall over. Granted, he had to admit she’d mellowed slightly herself and no longer automatically included him on her righteous hunts for vengeance.

That really made all the difference in the world, that she trusted him and that he didn’t provoke her. It had made marriage between them possible and also what made him decide they were ready for children.

That was really the only fear factor left for him and there was nothing he could do about it but wait for her to make up her mind. If this was something that was going to be around for all of their lives, was it something in her genes that she could pass down to their children? Was it just randomly inherent to her? Would it make her unwilling to try?

Veronica nudged him with her foot.

“You’re going to freeze with the ugliest expression on your face,” she said.

He pulled a face at her.

“I am always incredibly handsome,” he said, setting his paperwork aside.

“You keep telling yourself that, squire,” she said, stretching a bit.

“You sleep all right?” he asked.

“Yeah, another dream,” she said.

“Oh. Well, Spike had a midnight visitor, too,” said Logan. They exchanged stories, Logan going first, and when she’d finished relating her dream he paused. “Can I bring up a taboo subject?” he asked.

“Nothing’s ever stopped you before,” she said warily.

“What Lilly said…” he trailed off.

Veronica sighed, but he saw her face tighten with determination.

“Yeah, that caught my attention as well,” she said, sitting up.

“Your thoughts?” he asked.

“Listen to me before you react,” she prefaced.

“Not boding well,” he murmured.

“I want kids,” she said, smiling. “Yeah, I want them with you. I want to be a mom and I want to go to soccer games and I want to make them pancakes and teach them how to responsibly use their trust funds.”

“I’m liking it,” he said, but he knew there was more coming.

“But not now,” she said. “Not until after this thing with Spike is over. Now that we know this is a part of me there are a lot more factors we have to deal with. Genetics and feasibility. I’m going back on the pill.”

Logan shook his head and chuckled wearily.

“Because we’ve had so much time for wild lovemaking lately.”

“More’s the pity,” she said. “But I’m ‘No Take Chances Veronica’ and so it’s kaput until we can figure it out.”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, mock saluting her.

He couldn’t blame the decision and he couldn’t say he entirely disagreed with it, but it was simply what he’d feared would happen all along and he knew personally how easy it would be to put off forever. All the long months leading up to the decision and now it was simply stowed away in the attic of their lives until the next rainy day.

“Don’t,” she said, reaching up for him, framing his face. He tried to smile at her. “This is really hard for me, too.”

He nodded and kissed her nose.

“I know. It still hurts.”

“You big softie,” she said, easing herself into his lap. “I’m going to see you playing tea time and dress up and rolling around in the backyard if it’s the last thing I do.”

“Don’t joke about that,” he said, kissing her.

She kissed him back and he spent a few minutes enjoying the taste and feel of her against him, running his fingers through her bed head.

“I am as ever, your obedient wife,” she finally said, pulling back for air.

He snorted and bopped her nose before picking her up and setting her on her feet.

“If I’m ever going to get you knocked up,” he said, “we’d better solve this apocalypse, so up and at ‘em, Mars.”

This time she mock saluted him on the way to get dressed.

He looked after her for a minute, a new ache settling into his heart, but it was nothing that could be helped. Sometimes being a grown up was not an enjoyable experience and he’d rather solve his problems by throwing money at it or maybe even blowing it up. Still, having Veronica was the only thing he’d ever really wanted and he’d take that over any other life.

***

Buffy stretched and tried to wake up the best she could, but there was a weight around her waist pinning her down. She turned her head and found Spike nestled against her back, arm draped over her.

It was one of those moments when she simply had to stop and take stock of what was happening. It was too much for her mind to process that she was waking up next to Spike and he was alive. Her brain kept tossing thoughts like that at her like it was the biggest revelation she’d ever have and it threw her every time.

This time it actually brought tears to her eyes and she turned over in bed, careful to avoid his ribs, not that they weren’t already healing, and traced his face lightly. It was an unusual position for her to be in - he watched her, not the other way around - but it felt fitting to her. It was easier to watch his face while he was asleep, to allow herself the pleasure of simply being with him. She hadn’t had time for that yet.

Spike groaned as he woke up and she smiled at the familiar sound. He was a grouchy riser and their weird sleeping schedule usually aggravated that.

“Someone tap dancing on my ribs?” he asked, without opening his eyes.

“Not anymore,” she said, resting her head back on the pillow.

“Do me a favor and slay ‘em for me?” he said, tightening his hold on her.

“You’re barely hurt,” she said lightly. “You are the whiniest of babies.”

He cocked one eye open and grinned at her.

“Take that back.”

“Make me,” she said.

“I could,” he said, closing his eye again, “but that would involve moving.”

“Don’t you want to move even a little?” she asked, kissing his eyebrow and then moving to his cheekbone.

“I’m listening,” he said, his arm tugging her closer and traveling around her back.

“I don’t want you listening,” she said, kissing along his jawbone, “I want you moving.”

“Bossy sow,” he said, but he opened his eyes and moved his lips down to hers and she kissed him for a very long time, memories competing with the moment in her mind, bringing life with Spike into glorious color behind her eyes.

A door slammed in the hallway and voices sounded from down below.

“I guess we have to get up,” she said sorrowfully.

“Vampires don’t get up with the sun,” said Spike, burrowing his head into the pillow.

“You’re acting awfully…sweet,” said Buffy carefully. “Any idea why?”

“Stupid bloody William,” said Spike grumpily. “Never could disappoint a lady.”

Buffy thought about that for a moment and then decided to proceed with her first impulse.

“That would not be just a William trait,” she said, poking his chest. “I’m beginning to think you’re one and the same, after all.”

Spike snorted, but lapsed into thought.

“That’s disappointing,” he said. “Here I thought I had become something and now was going to revert only to be told I never became anything at all.”

“You became something all right,” she said. “Spike, you became the biggest pain in my ass I’ve ever had.” He smirked at her and she shoved him. “I mean it; people evolve based on time and experience. Vampires less so, they seem a bit stuck in whatever year they were turned, hence the terrible fashion sense sometimes, but when you live for centuries, you’re going to pick up a few trends.”

“Meaning?” he asked, eyeing her carefully.

“Meaning you did change,” she said. “It’s the core you that never really changed. It just got buried underneath all the blood and fangs. Now the soul is airing it out, but it’s still influenced by the personality you’ve shaped for yourself.”

“Don’t know,” he said. “Guess some inner contemplating is in order. Oh bloody joy.”

She laughed and kissed him.

“I can’t tell you how much I missed you,” she said.

“Yeah?” he said, cocking his head.

“Yeah. You were a part of me and then you were gone,” she said sadly. “It was a bit like being ripped open, I guess. Only metaphorically and without any intestinal parts.”

“Sorry, love,” he said. “Saving the world and all, your influence, that.”

“Stupid me,” she said, and then bit her lip. Talking about this was bringing up a lot of memories she hadn’t thought about in a long time. She wasn’t sure how wise that was.

“It’s who you are,” he said, putting one hand through her hair, brushing it out of her eyes. “Can’t help that any more than I can, yeah?”

“But then I’m stuck with the consequences,” she said. “Living without you was unbearable at first; then it got better and instead of wallowing on Willow’s couch in London I moved to Cleveland and fought the good fight. When we closed that Hellmouth I relaxed and I got a degree and started dating again, some really great guys even.”

“Yeah, can we skip that bit?” he asked, his voice rough.

“Sorry,” she said. “I know this time thing is really weird for you. What I meant was that I couldn’t just walk around like a war bride forever. So I didn’t, but then…bam, here you are again and this second chance is overwhelming.”

“Those can do that,” he said.

“But it’s good,” she said, smiling at him, feeling a bit vulnerable. “I mean, it’s the best gift I’ve ever received and I don’t care who did it, I could kiss the scaly face of Wolfram and Hart for giving you back to me.”

“I’d rather you kiss me,” he said.

She laughed and complied for a few moments.

“I’ll do that for a very long time,” she said, after.

“Dreams do come true,” he said.

“Apparently,” Buffy replied. “At least for Veronica.”

“Hope she’s okay,” said Spike, looking troubled.

“You could always ask her,” said Buffy. “The two of you used to be joined at the hip.”

“Don’t know if all things are repaired by sudden reanimation,” he said. “Bird’s been avoiding me.”

“Maybe it’s hard associating you with this sudden and huge change of life for her,” said Buffy.

Spike shrugged.

“Dunno. Miss her though.”

“Well, I think some time should be made for addressing that,” Buffy said.

“You’re different,” he said, studying her and she suddenly felt nervous.

“Bad different?”

He shook his head.

“My Slayer grew up. You were never young, not even as a delicious nubile baby Slayer,” he said, kissing her shoulder. “But there wasn’t always time for learning life for you. Too much on those shoulders. Too many people to watch out for. Couldn’t properly suss yourself out. Guess now you can.”

“I guess I can, but I’ll be expecting you to take up as much of my time as possible,” she said, oddly touched by his assessment of her.

“I’m very good at that,” he said.

“I know,” she said, kissing him one more time before sliding out of the bed. “Back to the situation at hand.”

“There’s the General,” he grumbled, but threw the covers off and rose, taking off bandages as he went.

She licked her lips, watching him get dressed, before moving to do so herself.

***

Veronica shared her latest dream over breakfast or what would be considered full on lunch in many circles. All it took was one tiny potential apocalypse and her early rising days had flown out the window.

Everyone took the news rather calmly. It didn’t really change most of what they knew, but the conversation then centered on if they should all relocate to Los Angeles.

“Wasn’t the whole point of this to keep Spike safely out of Wolfram and Hart’s hands?” asked Logan.

“We have two new pieces of information,” said Veronica. “He’s going to be there eventually, I know that.”

It amazed her that everyone just accepted that, at once, like now she was the established guru of the future and could set up a fortune teller tent at any carnival that happened upon her path. She supposed most of them had lived with the idea of prophecies and premonitions a lot longer than she had.

“And the other crucial bit of new information, my love?” asked Logan.

“The bounty hunter,” she said. “That coupled with the vampire attack at the Hellmouth tells me that Wolfram and Hart is just going to keep sending their thugs to bring him in. We might as well all keep together instead of spreading our resources and personnel.”

“I love it when you talk shop,” Logan murmured.

Veronica rolled her eyes and ignored him.

“I agree with her,” said Cordelia. “There’s no sense splitting up your source of information,” she pointed to Veronica, “and your bargaining chip,” she pointed to Spike. “Or your muscle,” she said, sticking thumbs out, one at Angel, one at Buffy.

“Boy, do I feel left out,” said Logan.

“It’s not as fun as it looks,” said Buffy wryly.

“But I just want to be included,” he said, pretending to cry.

“Cheer up, Scottie,” said Spike. “You’re more than likely to get all involved before long.”

“So, we’re all agreed that we’ll go to LA?” said Veronica, looking around.

“Sure, come on by,” grumbled Angel. “I’ll just host you all for an indeterminate period of time.” More than one person looked pointedly at him. He sighed. “I know, I know. Um, thanks for your hospitality,” he said toward Veronica and Logan.

Spike chuckled until Buffy poked him.

“Bravo, my Champion,” said Cordelia sarcastically. “Now that we’re all agreed, I say we don’t leave ‘til later so that our favorite vamps with souls don’t immolate as easily.”

“That will give me a chance to wrap some stuff up,” said Veronica.

Everyone quickly dispersed and Veronica made some quick phone calls and left the house, heading toward a familiar location.

She pulled into the Neptune High parking lot right about the same time Mac did.

“Did you just flashback?” asked Mac. “I totally did.”

“Such pleasant memories,” Veronica said. “Ah, there’s the spot where I endured humiliation and mocking for years.”

“It misses you,” said Mac.

“You guys wanna stop reminiscing and let me in on what the hell’s going on?” asked Wallace coming up behind them.

“Wallace, that’s no way to get information,” said Veronica.

“Says you,” he said, leading the way to one of Neptune’s outside lunch tables. “Serves me just fine.”

“With teenagers hiding pot,” said Mac. “We’re the big leagues, Fennel.”

“I’m quaking,” he said. “Now spill.”

Veronica explained the whole thing and as she did Wallace’s face got tighter and more withdrawn and she knew Logan had been right. After making a mental note to never let him know that, she proceeded with the ‘best friend making-up’ part of her day.

“So I just need a teensy favor,” said Veronica.

That actually helped because it was such a familiar mantra of their relationship, she knew.

“What would that be?” he asked dryly.

“Actually, I need Mac to come with me to LA,” said Veronica. “See, you’re off scot free.”

“One of these days, woman, I’m gonna teach you respect for a man’s time,” he said.

Mac snorted and Veronica opened her eyes wide.

“But then we’d never have these moments together.”

“I think I could do without ‘em,” he said. “Why did you drag me here anyway?”

“Because I need you,” said Veronica simply. “I can’t really march off to war with a brand new superpower and not tell my bestest friend every detail.”

“See, the sucking up part is fine,” he said. “Premonitions, huh?”

Veronica nodded, looking past him, ignoring the image of Lilly laughing behind Wallace and then vanishing. That had started happening since she woke up this morning. She wasn’t seeing Lilly everywhere, but there was something new in her outlook, like no matter where she was, there was always something in her peripheral vision. When she concentrated on it, she knew something she couldn’t know or hadn’t known before. It was a bit overwhelming and that was partly why she’d wanted to see Mac and Wallace, the bits of her life before she’d become this walking and talking predictor of the future.

“It’s, uh, slightly unnerving,” she said. “A bit cool. I doubt Logan will be able to keep even the shreds of dignity he had left.”

“Poor man, he has my sympathy,” said Wallace. Veronica raised an eyebrow at him. “What? Ain’t no man should have to deal with his wife knowing the future. Or wife dealing with her husband knowing the future for that matter.”

“How egalitarian of you,” said Mac.

“You okay with this?” he asked Mac, gesturing to Veronica. “Doesn’t freak you out?”

“I’m right here,” she said.

“I’ve got enough power coursing through the web at my finger tips to not be afraid of a little future prediction,” said Mac. “Veronica’s always had this, you know. She’s always figured things out.”

“The past,” said Wallace.

“Not that different from the future,” said Veronica musingly.

“You know this stuff weirds me out,” said Wallace. “But you bring yourselves back in one piece, got it?”

“Yes, Mr. Fennel,” said Veronica.

They chatted and talked for a little while longer until Wallace had to get back to class. Mac peeled out of the parking lot after making arrangements to meet Veronica at her house later.

Veronica stopped in at the office on her own way back, grabbing a few essential items, and settled a few files with her dad while telling him everything new.

He hugged her tightly and told her to be careful.

“This gal?” said Veronica, pointing to herself. “I’m always careful.”

“I can literally see your nose growing,” said her dad. “I love you, Veronica.”

“I love you,” said Veronica. “Always and always.”

“Keep me updated, okay?” asked Keith. “I can be there like that.”

“You’re my first call,” she said, kissing his cheek and leaving.

It was a bit wrenching actually, leaving. When she got back to the house she found Logan had packed almost everything she would have packed for herself and she busied herself getting ready to go.

“Psst, Veronica,” she heard.

When she looked around there was nobody there, but that didn’t mean anything anymore.

“What is it?” she asked Lilly or, more technically, herself.

“She knows now,” came the reply. 

Veronica pondered on that for a while before smiling to herself and continuing to pack.


	11. Chapter 11

Logan drove Veronica, Spike, and Buffy to LA. Cordelia and Wes had naturally gone with Angel, while Mac had insisted on driving her own car and Tara had offered to accompany her. Logan couldn’t say he disapproved of the driving arrangements, but it just meant that he was the only one who had something to do with his hands in his vehicle.

Veronica sat staring at the window and he wondered where her mind was. Was she seeing every inch of the miles they were traveling before it happened, locked in some epic chess game, a few moves ahead of everyone else? It was hard to see her in this light because while Veronica had always been somewhat of a prodigy in her chosen field, it had all been natural. At least, he’d always thought so.

Logan directed his attention to the backseat since there was no reason to brood about his wife’s proclivity toward fortune telling. Spike and Buffy sat close together and she leaned against his chest while he idly played with her hair. It warmed Logan to see them together again. They had always been the couple he rooted for and so it was nice seeing fate give them an extra chance.

“You got any plans for after this?” he asked them and immediately regretted it when both of them stiffened.

“Yeah, I think we’ll just take it one day at a time,” said Buffy.

“Right,” said Spike, without really looking at either Logan or Buffy.

Logan looked back at Veronica and she gave him her best I Can’t Believe What An Idiot I Married look. He shrugged and kept driving.

They arrived quicker than he thought they would. Angel really had a lead foot and Logan had enjoyed attempting to keep up with him.

When they pulled into the back of the hotel it was dark and Logan parked where Angel directed him. They all grabbed bags and headed into the hotel.

Wesley started switching on lights and opening doors.

“Fred called me,” he said. “Apparently there’s been quite an uprising of vampire activity over the last few days. She and Gunn are out helping his crew quell the attacks and expect to be wrapped up with that.”

“Why would that be happening now?” asked Mac.

Angel shrugged.

“Standard way of getting me…” he paused. “-Spike to react to their plan. Draw out the good guy to stop the bad guys, then bag the good guy.”

“All on me then,” said Spike. “Keep hurting the girl,” he muttered.

“Spike,” said Buffy. “None of this is your fault. In fact you’re probably least to blame of anyone. We have to keep you safe.”

“Like the crown jewels,” he said, but he stopped grumbling.

“So what’s the plan then?” asked Veronica. “Our plan to stop the bad guys and their plan?”

“I say we go to Wolfram and Hart and figure out how they intend to use Spike and the amulet,” said Angel. “I’ll just grab Lilah, maybe her current boss.”

“Didn’t we already try that?” asked Veronica.

Angel shifted his weight.

“It’s always worked for me before,” he said.

“Maybe that’s why they’ve changed tactics,” said Veronica.

“Look, you don’t know them,” said Angel.

Veronica shook her head and focused her gaze somewhere over his shoulder. Logan’s eyes widened with interest and he watched her closely.

“I may not know them,” she said, “but I can see what’s coming more clearly than anyone here. Lilah’s been told the plan now, but the way to get at that information is not brute force.”

“What’s your plan?” asked Tara.

“A little old-fashioned PI work,” said Veronica, smiling broadly.

Logan found himself a little bit turned on and wished there weren’t quite so many people around.

“I happen to know something about being a detective,” said Angel.

Wesley and Cordelia suddenly developed coughs that they turned their backs to deal with. Angel glared at them when they turned around again.

“We need to be sneaky about this,” said Buffy. “Wolfram and Hart is too big for us to come at them from the front.”

“They’re going to expect Angel to go to them,” Wesley pointed out.

“Ahh, that’s the beauty about using the side approach,” said Veronica. “You disguise it as the frontal assault.”

“Hands up everyone who thinks that’s a good idea,” said Logan.

Everyone but Angel raised their hands. Wesley and Cordelia shook their heads and stepped to the side.

“Not my place really,” said Wesley.

Cordelia simply smiled a little smile and looked incredibly pleased with herself. Logan had to wonder what was going on in that head of hers that she wasn’t telling them. She was, after all, a direct link to the Powers and much more experienced at unraveling their riddles.

“Still, a vast majority vote goes to the brainy blonde in the front,” said Logan, flourishing his fingers towards Veronica.

“Then gather around, people,” said Veronica. “Mac, break out the laptop and get ready to hack. Here’s what we’re going to do.”

***

Veronica leaned back against the counter and folded her arms, watching the busy lobby at work.

Wesley and Mac were deep in discussion over her laptop with Tara writing next to them. Cordelia had Buffy and Logan over in the corner and was holding up clothing next to them. Spike was on the phone behind her. Meanwhile, Angel was brooding.

Veronica sighed and headed over to where he was standing with his back to everyone, looking out at the garden.

“Is there anything else you can tell me about Wolfram and Hart’s security?” she asked.

Angel shook his head.

“The only surety is that their shaman will alert them when a vampire enters the building. Since I’m the vampire in question, that won’t really be a problem.”

“Angel,” Veronica said, choosing her words carefully. “You and I aren’t friends and I don’t really know you and this wouldn’t have been my first choice, but I’m pretty sure that Spike and I being used by the Powers doesn’t mean you’re any less important to them or their end game.”

“Being chosen by them isn’t exactly a fun gig at times,” said Angel.

“And is fun your main goal in life?” asked Veronica. “I’m actually curious here.”

Angel quirked a slight smile.

“You could say I’m more of a stay at home type.”

“Not today, partner,” said Veronica. “Today you get to storm the castle.”

“Well, word to the wise,” said Angel. “Seeing as how Wolfram and Hart are changing their tactics like you suggest, I’m thinking they’ll change their security, too.”

“Just what I’m counting on,” said Veronica.

She headed over to where Buffy and Logan were now arguing with Cordelia.

“I can’t fight in this,” Buffy said loudly.

“You’re not there to fight,” said Cordelia. “This isn’t exactly a brawl you’re going to.”

“Anything can be a brawl,” muttered Buffy darkly.

Veronica shot a look at her and then back at Angel before shrugging her shoulder and interrupting.

“The earbuds okay?” she asked.

Logan nodded and tugged on his ear.

“You know how much I hate things in my ears,” he said.

“I do not even want to know,” said Cordelia. “Wardrobe a success?” she asked Veronica.

“They look great,” said Veronica. “Follow me.”

Mac was still rapidly typing, but pointed wordlessly at the table next to her. Veronica picked up the keycards and ids and handed them to Logan and Buffy.

“They have a file on the Slayer, you know,” said Wesley.

“Not for long,” said Veronica.

“How did you get all this stuff?” asked Buffy, fiddling with the pin on her suit.

“Let’s just say it pays to have Q on your payroll,” said Veronica, smiling at Mac.

“Done,” said Mac. “That’s all I can do from outside.”

“Thank you,” said Veronica. “Okay, guys, gather around because it’s time you all became spies.”

***

Buffy nervously adjusted her hair as she and Logan prepared to walk into Wolfram and Hart.

“You’re doing great,” said Veronica in her ear.

“Your wife is something else,” said Buffy to Logan.

He just smirked at her and held the door open.

Buffy smoothed down her suit and, once inside, pushed down the button Mac had shown her on her new cellphone.

“You’re copying every scrap of data you come across,” Mac said into her earbud. “Keep moving and be ready for the handoff.”

Buffy and Logan walked down the hall, through the metal detectors, directed by Mac and occasionally Wesley or Cordelia. Men and women in suits were everywhere, talking on phones, exchanging files, or simply getting to their next destination.

“Okay,” Veronica said. “Angel’s getting ready for his entrance, which is good because I imagine Buffy’s picture being blown up and investigated any second now.”

A large shattering and shrill sound interrupted her and Buffy looked toward the bottom of the stairs. Angel had just thrown a park bench through the glass doors and people were scattering.

Guards converged on the entrance and Buffy and Logan began ducking into offices and planting bugs and flash drives on all the computers they found.

“Angel’s moving to your position,” said Mac. “Get back out into the hall.”

A large man in a suit moved in front of Buffy and she bumped into him.

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“Ma’am, stay here for your own safety,” he said, barring her way.

“But I have a meeting to get to,” she said, annoyed.

“There’s a security breach to the building,” he said. 

Buffy looked over her shoulder and widened her eyes at Logan. He took her hint and inched back out to the hallway. A loud growl and the sound of fists hitting flesh sounded from out there.

“None of these matter,” said Angel loudly, coming into frame in the doorway. He was dragging Logan by the collar. “I don’t care how many of you I have to go through until you send Lilah down here.”

He shoved Logan away from him and barreled down the hall.

The large security guard nodded at Buffy.

“Stay here,” he said, and headed off after him.

Logan got up from the floor and Buffy whispered to him.

“Are you okay?”

“Are you sure he was acting?” asked Logan, putting a hand to his wrist.

“Back to your offices,” said a second security guard.

“Did you get it?” Buffy asked, as they moved toward the staircase, directed by Mac.

Logan nodded and they disappeared into the stairwell.

“Fourth floor,” said Mac.

Buffy nodded and pulled a suddenly hesitant Logan after her.

“Couldn’t they keep their evil lair of evil in the basement like all demonic law firms?” asked Logan, breathing hard on the third set of stairs.

“Quiet,” said Veronica in their ears. “Lilah’s office is directly ahead of you.”

Buffy peeked through the doorway until she saw Lilah and three other lawyer-looking types exit the office and head down the hall where she could just hear Angel yelling again.

She nodded to Logan and they silently slipped down the hall to Lilah’s office.

Once in, Logan settled down at the computer and quickly stuck the device, which Angel had brought in and passed to him since it would trigger the alarms, into the USB port.

“Give it a sec and I’ll be in,” said Mac. 

Buffy looked down at the whirring, blinking device and felt really old for a second.

“You got it?” Veronica murmured.

“I got everything,” said Mac. “Logan, type this,” and rattled off a string of words Buffy didn’t understand, but Logan apparently did.

“I don’t see anything on the amulet,” said Logan. “But the hard drive is copied.”

“It’s okay, that was just a dream for this job,” said Veronica. “Now get out of there.”

Logan pulled out the drive and Buffy finished planting the last of her bugs. They quickly slipped out of the office and back down the stairs.

They walked into the main lobby and stopped at the security checkpoint.

“It’s a frisk for everyone,” said the guard. “Security breach.”

“It’s okay, man,” said Logan, holding his hands up. “I read my contract, I know the drill.”

Buffy rolled her eyes and submitted to her own frisk.

“They’re going to find the device,” she muttered when she was done.

“Good thing I sent a Slayer then,” said Veronica.

Just when the guard was about to reach Logan’s jacket packet Buffy spun and kicked him in the head.

“Run,” she said.

Logan vaulted over the checkpoint and ran for the doors. Buffy punched her guard in the jaw and slid under his punch through the metal detectors. She ran, ducking another security guard and drive piling another. Logan reached the doors and stopped. She gestured him on and he left. She exchanged blows with two more security guards. Two more got behind her with guns. Buffy frowned and evaluated her options.

“Buffy, are you okay?” asked Logan, panting as he ran.

“Just keep going,” said Buffy.

“Keep cool there,” said Veronica. “Help coming in behind you.”

The guards with guns suddenly jerked backwards as their legs were pulled out from under them. Shots rang into the air and Buffy lunged forward, slamming the guards in front of her together. Angel ran up behind her and they escaped through the doors together, running down the street as fast as their supernaturally powered legs could carry them.

“Buffy, are you out?” asked Veronica, the only tinge of fear coming into her voice that Buffy had heard the entire time.

“Relax, you mastermind you,” said Logan, appearing in front of Buffy and Angel at the rendezvous point. “They got out.”

“Then come on home,” said Veronica, sounding relieved.

Buffy felt her adrenaline start to cool down and exchanged grins with Logan. Even Angel looked a little bit happier than before. She guessed he’d gotten to crack a lot of heads up there.

“You talk to Lilah?” she asked.

“Yeah,” said Angel. “Now that we’ve done it the sneaky way, she can’t possibly know we’re coming for her.”

“Wes and Tara were able to help Mac figure out the magic security system around the servers and she hacked in,” said Cordelia. “Now we’ve got the information we need.”

“Wouldn’t a vision have sufficed?” grumbled Angel and they headed back to the hotel.

***

Spike had been rather annoyed at needing to stay at the hotel while everyone else got to go off and do the fun ‘breaking into the evil law firm’ thing. He could see the sense in the plan obviously, he wasn’t an idiot, but he was certainly bored. That much hadn’t changed, which was actually slightly encouraging. It still wasn’t any fun to go through.

It did give him an interesting look at Veronica’s abilities and how much she had grown. She commanded the entire mission with ease, speaking into her ear bud, peering over Mac’s shoulder, double-checking blueprints, directing Wesley and Tara’s efforts with the books. It was like watching someone you’d known as a little girl suddenly becoming an adult. Not that Veronica hadn’t been capable and knowledgeable even when he’d first known her, but somewhere in the five years he’d been gone, she’d really come in to her own and not even the sudden visions were altering that. He was saddened by having missed so much, but very grateful to be here now.

As soon as Buffy came back he restrained himself from running over to her, but pulled her into his side once she approached him.

“I’m back and all scratch free,” she said, exhibiting her hands. 

He gestured to a split along one of her knuckles.

“What’s that, love?”

“That was from hurting the other guy,” she said. “It doesn’t count.” She stuck her lower lip out and he bent to kiss it before a throat clearing interrupted them.

“Good job, guys,” said Veronica, winking at them before turning back around. “I think we got what we needed.”

“They know we were there,” Angel said.

Veronica nodded.

“They were always going to know we were there. Hopefully, they’ll just think we were there for you to vent off some frustration. The virus Logan planted on the server should serve its function to wipe out the security camera footage and erase the data they had on Buffy.”

“The venting was kinda nice,” Angel said, shrugging.

“So, what’s next?” asked Tara.

“Now comes the boring sifting of information,” said Veronica. “Mac’s already hunting through their servers, setting up search algorithms for anything to do with the amulet or Spike. Then we can go through Lilah’s hard drive.”

“As soon as we find out what they’re planning,” Mac said, poking her head over her laptop, “Tara, Wesley, and I can figure out a way to disrupt the ritual.”

“Do the rest of us get a break then?” asked Logan.

The sound of clicking heels on the tile outside the door cut him off. Veronica made a quick gesture to Mac who tapped a few keys on her laptop and slid the device with Lilah’s hard drive on it into her pocket. Wesley covered his books and Spike found himself being shoved by Buffy behind the counter and into Wesley’s office.

“Oi,” he said. “Watch it.”

“Shh,” she said. “We don’t know who that is.”

The sound of a door opening came next and Spike and Buffy peeked through the gap of the doors to see Lilah coming in accompanied by two men in suits.

“I see it’s been a busy day for you,” said Lilah.

“What do you want?” growled Angel. 

Spike had to admit, Angel had a way of cutting to the heart of a matter.

“Well, in conjunction with the sudden influx of injuries to our medic stations, we also discovered an alarming breach of our security systems. Learn a few new tricks, did we?” Lilah asked.

Cordelia mimed a yawn.

“Nothing gets past you, does it? You’d better scurry along then and fix the damage.”

“It doesn’t matter what you found,” said Lilah. “Events have moved past the point of no return. Wolfram and Hart is bigger than all of you put together.”

“Did you really come here just to say that?” asked Logan. “How do evil lawyers actually get anything done?”

“By proxy,” said Lilah and smirked at him. Spike had to wonder what she meant by that exactly.

“What’s your point?” asked Wesley, folding his arms.

Lilah’s face contorted for a second and then she smiled again.

“You should just let us have the vampire now. After all, you can’t defend him against the might of the Senior Partners. That’s what it will come down to and no amount of petty larceny is going to change that.”

“Never going to happen,” said Angel. 

Spike rolled his eyes. Trust Angel to be the most loyal and annoying thing on the planet.

“Your loss, my gain,” said Lilah. “I felt I did owe it to you to at least try. After all, everything’s about to change.”

Angel made a motion like he was going to rush her and Lilah flinched slightly, but backed up, her two men in suits moving in front of her.

“Goodbye, Lilah,” said Wesley.

“Goodbye, Wes,” she said almost sadly. Spike made a mental note to wonder what had happened there.

Lilah left and Angel secured the doors after her.

“Well, nobody’s leaving here,” said Buffy, coming out of the office. Spike followed her out. “Not until we know exactly what’s going to happen.”

Spike sighed and looked down at his already tapping foot. Another round of boredom for Spike.


	12. Chapter 12

_Veronica lay on the floor of the hotel lobby. Clouds rolled across the ceiling above her head and she idly looked for the shapes within them._

_“Hey, that one looks like me murdered by the pool,” said Lilly beside her._

_Suddenly it did._

_“I feel like I’m becoming more self-aware in these dreams,” said Veronica. “I’m not just following someone else’s pictures.”_

_“Well, this was always you. Their agenda is finished, isn’t it?” said Lilly._

_Red lines appeared in the clouds and brimstone danced along their edges._

_“What are the Senior Partners like?” she asked, turning her head, but Lilly was gone._

_She saw a vast cloud of something approaching the doors. Behind her Spike screamed._

***

Veronica rubbed her neck, willing her eyes to stay open. She’d been going through what seemed like the same files for fifty years now…or maybe it was a day. Either way, it was too long.

“There has to be a better way of narrowing the search down,” she told Mac.

Mac took another gulp of her energy drink and Veronica wondered just how many Mac had consumed that day. She was a trifle worried about her.

“Hacking is usually about finesse,” said Mac, “but not always. Sometimes it’s about wandering around in a maze until you find that one right turn.”

“How many corn mazes were you lost in as a child?” asked Veronica, narrowing her eyes.

“Would you like a go?” asked Mac, shoving her laptop in Veronica’s direction.

Veronica held her hands up in surrender and went back to piecing through the printed pages of documents Mac had printed out from Lilah’s hard drive.

“Anything from security footage?” she asked, a minute later.

“Just the same thing,” said Mac. “There are a lot of deliveries being made at their loading dock and why a law firm has a loading dock, I’ll never know.”

“Most evil rituals involve an alarming amount of animal sacrifice,” said Cordelia, bringing over some fresh coffee.

“Great,” said Mac, “now I know.”

“Thank you,” said Veronica, accepting her coffee.

“Thank you,” said Cordelia. “I’ve had my fill at looking in musty books for three lifetimes. It’s bad enough I have to see demons in my head.”

Veronica wasn’t really listening at this point, because there was something about the numbers she was reading that didn’t sit well with her. She shook her head.

“There’s something here,” she muttered.

She grabbed a calculator and began tallying up what she was seeing.

“What’s the big find?” asked Logan, appearing beside her.

“There’s no big find,” said Mac.

“No, I know my girl. She’s got the bloodhound look.”

“You might regret that little speech,” said Veronica and broke into a huge smile. “Well, at least I know why they’re doing this. Aside from prerequisite evil.”

“Well, why?” asked Logan.

“Cordelia,” Veronica said, turning to her, “on a scale of one to ten, how evil would you say Wolfram and Hart has been in the last five years, compared to the five before?”

Cordelia stopped and thought for a second.

“Aside from the fact I’ve only been actively opposing them for nine years, I’d say a full on ten the first four and about a five and a half for this last five. Actually Angel and I joke that they’re on vacation or something because they haven’t been as busy and we’ll have to close the business because neither are we.”

“That’s exactly the problem,” said Veronica, ignoring the revelation that Angel sometimes made jokes. More people gathered around, drawn in by her excitement. “Wolfram and Hart’s numbers are down, way down; their revenue stream has been sliced at least in half, very possibly more.”

“What does that mean?” asked Tara.

“It means that they need more business. I’m guessing their close proximity to the Sunnydale Hellmouth brought them a lot of clients. With it gone, they’re not raking in the evil dough. If they got a hold of an amulet that could reverse that…”

“They could raise their profit again,” said Cordelia. “Gotta hand it to them, it’s a nice plan. Evil, but nice.”

“They’re banking on this move, too,” said Veronica, scanning the sheet again. “They’ve moved a huge amount of their assets here, that’s probably what some of the deliveries are.”

She felt alive again for a second; this is what she was good at, gathering clues and piecing together information. This was the adrenaline rush she felt right when she was about to crack a case wide open and it was a good feeling.

Logan was watching her with a proud smirk on his face and she smirked right back at him.

“We still need to know how they’re planning on doing all this,” Wesley pointed out. “I might add that until I know more information, I won’t really know where to look. I’m fishing blindly.”

“I might be able to help you out there,” said Mac slowly, rapidly typing. “I, my friend, have just broken through the last firewall around some seriously mystically encrypted data. I should be able to decrypt it shortly, but looks like it might be some more details about the ritual.”

“Perfect,” said Tara. “Then we can plan a counter attack.”

“Gotta love those,” said Spike, who Veronica was pretty sure must be aching to be attacked again by this point.

“I think it’s time we did that planning,” said Veronica. “Spike, Buffy, Angel, care to lend me some muscle?”

Spike leaned forward, eyes gleaming with sudden interest.

***

Logan leaned against the counter, continuing to watch everyone around him plan. It wasn’t a bad situation to be in. He could think of worse things to do with his time. It was nice to be able to sit back and let everyone else have an opinion sometimes.

“I hate this plan,” said Buffy. “There’s no safeguard in place.”

“Sometimes you’ve got to roll the die and pray it lands on your number,” said Veronica.

“Oh, say we roll you around and see what number ends up on top?” asked Buffy. “I have trusted you every single step of the way so far, but you aren’t giving me any assurances that you know what this will do.”

“I’m not super thrilled myself,” said Veronica. “I need more information.”

“I could knock you out so you can dream,” said Buffy.

“Okay, let’s calm down here,” said Tara, stepping between them. “The plan isn’t finished yet, Buffy. We don’t have everything decided,” she finished, looking at Veronica.

Buffy took a deep breath and nodded.

“As touching as all of this is,” said Spike, “I’m the one with the bloody bullseye on my chest. The rest of you can defer to me for once. I’m sodding tired of other people up and deciding my life for me.”

“Then what’s your decision?” asked Tara.

“Eureka!” said Wesley from somewhere behind them.

Logan almost did a double take.

“Yes, he does actually say that,” said Cordelia nonchalantly. “You get used to it.”

“I have it,” said Wesley, waving some paper around. “The whole ritual, I know what they’re going to do and where and how and everything.”

“Okay, lay it on me,” said Veronica.

Wesley proceeded to talk and talk and talk. Logan got bored a little bit in the middle. It appeared to involve a lot of chanting, several goats dying, the destruction of many people, and a brand new Hellmouth opening up underneath the Wolfram and Hart building.

“That exact position?” asked Tara.

Wesley nodded.

“The Codex is quite clear. They are adapting the ritual obviously, since the amulet is something new, but the location of the ritual should not be affected by that. The results are always the same in that instance.”

“Living in LA is going to get a whole lot nastier,” said Cordelia. “Think of the traffic.”

“They’re affecting the weather,” said Tara, “drawing in that much energy. It’s got to travel somehow and there’s so much space between here and Sunnydale.”

“Everyone and everything in its path will get flattened,” said Veronica musingly.

“So it has to never start or get stopped before it gets to that point,” said Buffy. “Your plan just developed brand new elements of risk. We’re talking Risk-o-rama here.”

“I know,” said Veronica. “You’re right, it’s too dangerous.”

“Thank you,” said Buffy.

“Oi, stop deciding things,” said Spike.

Veronica was looking off into the distance again and Logan watched her make some decisions.

“This can go several ways,” she said. “I can’t predict which way is the safest or what the outcomes will concretely be.” She turned to Cordelia. “I don’t suppose you had a vision that would help?”

Cordelia shook her head.

“I think this one’s on you, honey. The Powers have had their say. They point me at a bad guy, but we’re the ones who decide what to do once we get there. That’s where my specialty ends.”

“And mine begins,” said Veronica, sounding frustrated. “I just don’t know. I mean, I’m so new at this, I don’t really understand the whole thing yet and there’s so much going on in my head right now!”

“Why don’t we take a break?” said Tara wisely. “Veronica, just relax and try not to think about it. Mac, Wesley, and I will keep looking and then we can all,” she said pointedly, looking at Spike, “make a decision.”

He shook his head at her, but didn’t say anything.

Veronica nodded.

“You’re right, I’m overdoing it.”

Veronica walked away and stood looking out the window.

“Sure, she listens to you,” Logan said to Tara as she came toward him.

Tara patted his shoulder.

“You’re always one of the things on her mind,” she said. “But you knew that.”

“I did,” said Logan and tried to make up his own mind about if he should go over and talk to her or not.

He decided against it when he saw Spike approach her.

“That’s about time,” said Tara, following his eye line.

“You said it,” said Logan. “I was going to lock them in a room together.”

“You’ve such a way with people,” she said, grabbing books to take back to the desk.

Logan grinned and turned back to watch Spike and Veronica talk. He did have a way with people. Sometimes it was about pushing their buttons, but it was much less self-destructive than it had been before. He was calmer now, more caring, domesticated if you will. He wouldn’t really have it any other way.

***

Spike cautiously approached Veronica, not really sure of how to go about this. He knew how he would have done it once upon a time, but then he didn’t know himself so well anymore and Veronica herself had aged five years.

“You’ve been avoiding me, Private Eye,” he said finally, deciding blunter was always better.

She smiled and kicked her leg out a little to bump his.

“You noticed that, did you?”

“Pretty hard not to,” he said, leaning against the wall. “Care to let me in on the why?”

“Oh, this and that,” said Veronica. “Been a little preoccupied with the old noggin,” she said, gesturing to her head.

“There is that,” he said, watching her closely. “Still, a bit of time for your old pal Spike wouldn’t have hurt. I mean, I was dead.”

“You were dead,” she said, looking at him. “That hurt a lot actually.”

“Sorry, luv,” he said. “Didn’t really plan it that way.”

“People rarely do,” she said. “But I get it.”

“So the brush off was because you forgave me for dying?” he asked.

“I was first in line on the ‘bring Spike back’ train,” said Veronica, giving him an incredulous look. “I brought you back, in a way.”

“Been meaning to thank you for that,” said Spike.

“But you were…different,” said Veronica.

“Can’t help having the soul, pet,” he said. “William’s clamoring for attention.”

“But you’re not different,” she said.

“Noticed that part myself,” he said.

“So what are you?” she asked.

“Dunno,” he said and shrugged. “Figure I can suss that out after I don’t die again.”

“Smart,” said Veronica.

“The brains, that’s me,” he said, smirking.

She smiled but then she turned solemn again.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “It wasn’t really that at all. I don’t know what it was except for when it was really you and then you were all…”

“Raving mentalist,” he suggested.

She smiled again.

“That. It hurt to see you like that.”

“I got better,” he said, gently probing.

“You did indeed,” she said. “You’re practically 100% annoying and better.”

“Cheers and bloody huzzahs,” he said. “Then what happened?”

“It’s never stopped for me,” she said, looking rueful. “All of my dreams, they always involve you being in pain.” That was all it took for him to understand, but she kept going. “All of the roads I see now, that’s how it ends, as far down them as I can see. I feel responsible, this weight of the future, it’s on me now. Your life is on me now and even seeing you reminds me… It’s too much and there are some parts I like. It’s actually…exciting and useful and fun. But when it hinges on me suddenly knowing how to do something I never knew I could do… When it comes down to one of my best friend’s life again, that part I just want to throw away and not deal with.”

She huffed a sigh and met his eyes for the first time since he’d been back and he smiled at her.

“A bit of advice for you,” he said. “From someone who spent rather a long time, hundred years or so, with someone who had the sight.”

“Someone certifiably insane is not going to help me right now,” said Veronica. “No offense.”

Spike shook his head.

“Dru had visions before she was crazy and she didn’t know what to do with them either. I had a long time putting all her history together, weeding out the crazy bits and deciphering all the metaphor, but there’s no one understands Drusilla like me. Angelus may think he does, but he only knew the wicked heart he instilled in her. The child lurking inside, the woman with a destiny, now that he blundered right on by.”

“I know you were with her,” said Veronica curiously. “But how could you really know her?”

“Time and patience, my pet,” said Spike. “Which is what I want to tell you. Time and patience. Some people might not think that’s my forte and it really isn’t, but when it comes to people, there I’ve got all the time in the world. I devoured every bit of her I could. In learning that, I knew what made her tick and I could complement the crazy, compensate for it when she couldn’t.”

“I don’t get it,” said Veronica.

“It’s the people in anyone’s life that keep them from being mad,” said Spike. “You’ve got the one thing Dru never got, time to sort out your thoughts, what you’re seeing, and the people to support you. Scottie over there is your anchor to this world, don’t ever let him go.”

“I wasn’t planning on it,” she said, gazing at her husband with very real fondness.

“Good, it’s all you need,” he said. “Dru had me and you have Logan, but you also have you, whereas Dru herself was lost. She was very good at seeing things, but not the best at understanding them, just enough coherent thought to wrap the picture in fancy and blood. You’re the smartest woman I know, Private Eye. You’ve got the perfect brain for this gig. Don’t be afraid to take the time, though, or to find the support.”

“What about now when I have no time because Wolfram and Hart is trying to destroy everything?” she asked. “Do I ask them to politely wait until I get the hang of visions that will defeat them?”

“You could try,” he said. “Don’t second guess what you’ve already done, luv. What you see is what will be, but you treat it like it doesn’t have to be, that’s the ticket.”

“Like it doesn’t have to be,” she said musingly.

“That’s it, yeah?” he said.

She laughed a little and bumped his shoulder with hers.

“I really really missed you.”

“Can’t say the same except for this past week,” he said. “We back to trading friendship beads then?”

“We were always friends,” she said. “I’m sorry I ignored you. I really just felt…it was hard.”

“But I was the one with the key to the whole thing all along,” he said smugly.

“I don’t know if I’d say that,” she said. “But you did have some good advice and I really did forget that out of all of us you probably have the most experience with what I’m going through. So from now on, you’re my go-to guy.”

“Do I get a badge?” he asked.

“I may promise not to tell Buffy anything I might see about you,” she said.

“Oh, tell her those things,” said Spike.

Veronica hugged him and Spike relaxed fully. It was very good to have this friendship again.

“Are you going to be okay?” asked Veronica. “I mean, with being back and everything?”

Spike cocked his head.

“Think so. Buffy and I are still dancing around each other a bit, but that’s always our way.”

“She loves you so much,” said Veronica. “Losing you was horrible for all of us, but she had lost so much already.”

“I know,” said Spike. “We talked a bit.”

“Keep talking,” said Veronica. “If Logan is my anchor, then she’s yours. We should double date more often.”

Spike laughed heartily, something that felt incredibly good to do.

“I’ll get right on that,” said Spike.

“She’s mad at me for putting you in danger,” said Veronica. “That says an awful lot, don’t you think?”

“She’s not mad at you,” said Spike. “If anything she’s mad at me for putting myself in danger again.”

“You’re awfully good at that,” said Veronica.

“Maybe I should start a school,” said Spike.

“You’ll forgive me if I don’t sign up.”

“I’d make you teacher’s pet,” he said.

“I’ll still pass,” she said. “I’m happy you’re back.”

Spike looked around, his friends, his real family, spread out. Not everyone, no, but the vast majority of people he truly cared about. Buffy herself, the glorious everything of his existence. It didn’t really matter what part of him was William and what part wasn’t. He was here, he was himself, and he was going to love that woman forever, the best way he knew how.

“Me too, Private Eye.”

There was more planning after that. After all, apocalypses waited for no man and Spike was ready to get this over with. He was ready to do his part, no matter what it took. He was never leaving again if he could help it, but he couldn’t spend the rest of his life looking over his shoulder waiting for some evil lawyer to pull a burlap sack over his head. He needed to face this. They all did.

Veronica stepped up, listening to Wesley, Mac, and Tara as they gave their advice. Buffy and Angel had their say as well. Spike himself had plenty to say on the matter. It wasn’t perfect and it was dangerous, but after all, wasn’t that when things were interesting? Spike liked a good plan that could go disastrously awry.

He thought they were almost done when Veronica stiffened and turned to look at him in horror.

“They’re coming,” she said.

“What?” he asked.

The doors slammed open and a tide of vampires entered the room. A large cloud swarmed before them, something tangible, like millions of small forms coalescing together. Spike made to defend himself, but he was soon lost in the dark. Even his vampire eyes weren’t doing him any good. He was seized and dragged. There was shouting and sounds of thuds and flesh being hit, stakes being slid home. He couldn’t see anything until a brilliant flash of light hit his eyes and he could see a solid wall of light bright enough to make him fear for his safety emanating from Cordelia and somehow being directed by Tara.

It was the last thing he saw before he was dragged back into the darkness, wordless shouts ringing in his ears.


	13. Chapter 13

When Veronica opened her eyes she was confused. She’d thought she was fighting vampires in the hotel but something was wrong with her vision. It felt like she was seeing double. There was the hotel yes, but overlaying that was the Wolfram and Hart building. She was walking outside of it with Wesley, Tara, and Mac. Mac held her notebook laptop. At the doors Mac stopped, but the others kept walking. On the other side of the building Wesley stopped and Tara kept walking. On the point of the building between the third and fourth sides she stopped. Veronica rounded the corner again and saw Mac.

She blinked because there was something tangible in the air, a light glowing of energy connecting Mac to Tara and Tara to Wesley and Wesley to Mac.

When she blinked it was gone and she was back in the hotel, Logan leaning over her with a worried look on his face.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “Be okay because you are the only wife I’ve got.”

“I guess I can put that fear about the secret Mormonism to rest,” she said, accepting his hand and pulling herself up. “What happened?”

“You tell me,” said Buffy.

Veronica looked around. There were piles of dust littering the floor, Cordelia was patching up Angel’s midsection, and Wesley and Tara were muttering together by the front door.

“Spike’s gone,” she said. “They have him and the amulet, they can do their ritual.”

“Which means we need to get over there now,” said Buffy. “But there are vampires surrounding the building. Wesley and Tara have a shield going on, but that’s holding us back as well as the vampires.”

Veronica nodded, trying to think. She was having trouble again, distinguishing reality from possible futures. She realized she was still holding Logan’s hand and she quietly turned to him.

“Do you think I can do this?” she asked, almost forcing herself to ask.

Logan’s brow furrowed and he looked her up and down.

“You? You can do anything, Veronica.”

“I wish I’d known before,” she said, suddenly buoyed with more confidence. It was nice to be believed in. “Angel, is there any other way to get out of here?”

“Basement,” said Angel. “I’m pretty sure they’ve never found that way in.”

“Then let’s pack and get going,” said Veronica. “Mac, you’ve got the spell we talked about, right?”

“Sure thing, boss,” said Mac. “We’re ready on that front.”

“Then let’s go,” said Veronica.

Angel, Buffy, Cordelia, and Logan stocked themselves up with weapons. Veronica took a stake and a knife while Wesley coolly packed rounds of ammunition.

“Can that shield stay up once you’re gone?” asked Buffy.

Tara nodded.

“We’ll set a time constraint on it. If we’re not here to reinforce the energy it will collapse after that point and we don’t want to exert ourselves too much. We’re going to need everything we’ve got for later.”

Angel led the way to the basement and through a maze of tunnels. They found one vampire guard a short distance away but they quickly disposed of him. They kept going and when they emerged from the tunnels they were close to Wolfram and Hart. Veronica closed her eyes and concentrated.

“I think we need to go around to the back,” she said. “It will be easier to get inside. They’ve sent out most of their muscle to keep us in place at the hotel, but the Senior Partners and whoever they’ve got doing the ritual are sure to be on guard. Besides…they’re close, closer on this side.”

It was amazing how everyone just automatically obeyed her. She should have gotten the sight years ago. Or at least known about it.

There were guards at the loading dock entrance and a security system Mac quickly disabled while Angel and Buffy did their fighting thing.

“Are you ready” Veronica asked Mac.

Mac nodded and grinned, pressing some buttons on her notebook.

They crept along the corridors while Veronica felt a whole lot of déjà vu as she led them. Suddenly the whole building shook and they all fell to the floor.

“What the hell was that?” asked Logan.

“Ritual’s started,” said Veronica. “They’re opening up the gates of hell.”

***

Buffy had been fairly calm up to this point, but her blood had reached the point of an apocalypse when all she needed was an enemy to fight.

“Then we’d best close them before Sunnydale’s crater decides to expand to LA,” she said. “Veronica, how close are we?”

Veronica sounded a bit shaken.

“Close. I think it’s those double doors up there.”

Buffy nodded and took off down the hall, the rest of them following after. When they got to the doors they found more guards. 

Buffy ducked under a punch, swinging her axe to slice the vampire’s head off. Beside her Angel was battling a demon taller than any demon had a right to be. Cordelia and Logan were engaged with other guards and Buffy set in to slay vampires, figuring she might as well follow her calling.

Veronica held a whispered conversation with Mac who was rapidly typing on her keyboard. She took up her station to the left of the doors. When a demon slipped past Logan and ran for her, it ran smack into an invisible wall surrounding her before Wesley blew its head off with his shotgun.

Buffy staked the last vampire and turned to look at the others.

“You know what to do,” said Veronica to Tara and Wesley.

They each turned to Mac and extended one hand to touch her invisible wall, and then they ran away from everyone, each down a different hallway, trailing their hands behind them. Buffy could almost see the energy they were dragging from Mac’s wall.

“Now it’s our turn,” said Buffy. She kicked the doors in and ran inside.

***

Spike was having a bit of an off day. He woke to find himself bound in the center of a circle of people clad in suits. There were lines drawn on the floor and someone had removed his coat and shirt. Candles lined the room, the only illumination available, casting shadows that made it tricky to distinguish shapes. The same dark cloud that had dragged him from the hotel swirled above his head.

His wrists were restrained by manacles that were welded to the floor. He tested their strength and found himself unable to budge them. They had clearly been made for something stronger than him - even the chain links were unbreakable. Someone was chanting behind him and he turned his head to look.

There were figures there in dark robes, appropriately spooky and ritualistic. He rolled his eyes. The woman named Lilah stood in front of them and in her hands she held a pillow, the amulet resting upon it.

Something snapped in his vision when he saw it. He hadn’t exactly been thrilled at the idea of this sodding trinket connecting him back to the earth and linking him to some kind of destiny. To tell the truth, he’d never really wanted to see it again, but there was something about it right now, something very special, and he was curious to know what would happen if he put it on again.

“All in good time,” said Lilah, kneeling far enough away from him that he couldn’t touch her. “You’ll be reunited soon enough.”

“My coat had better be in the same fine condition you found it in,” was all he said to her.

She smiled broadly and turned back to the hooded figures. He could sense energy starting to build up and he tried to figure out some way of escaping. He doubted he would, so unless someone came to rescue him, he had a feeling he was about to be the source of a brand new Hellmouth.

The shadows rose higher along the walls and the chanting grew louder. The bleating of a goat was abruptly cut off and the smell of fresh blood assaulted his senses. The blood was soon sprinkled in the air around him, splattering his chest and face.

The dark cloud above him was what was really bothering him. It idly swirled, seemingly not doing anything important, but he had the feeling it was somehow the current embodiment of the Senior Partners.

Suddenly the cloud flashed brightly and spread toward the walls and down the door. The entire building shook and only Spike’s manacles kept him from falling over, cruelly digging into his wrists.

There was a loud popping sound and Lilah began walking toward Spike with the amulet. He kept looking for a way out but it wasn’t until the doors flung open and Buffy rushed in that he had any hope of one. His eyes connected with hers for a moment and then Lilah slipped the amulet over his head.

His world disappeared into a burst of light, but it didn’t feel like the light and fire of before. It was colder, fiercer, and he had no purpose. It still felt right; it felt like something he’d been missing without knowing it. Something pressed down against his very soul, the soul he could feel with a tangible weight, and he screamed.

***

Logan found himself wishing he’d asked to borrow Wesley’s guns before the man had run to take his place. It would have been far easier to find a corner and snipe down the demons and vampires that were assailing him now. He was a pretty good shot, practicing regularly at the shooting gallery, but there was no time to think about it now.

He ducked and weaved and thrust and ducked some more. It was far more likely one of these monsters would be feasting on him than he would be slaying it. He stayed close to Veronica and tried to stay alive. That was really all he could do at this point.

As they entered the room, shadows rose to meet them, as did the horrible dark cloud from before. It was intangible, yet menacing, and it hovered over them as if waiting to pounce.

Buffy wasted no time in fighting her way toward Spike. He was bound in the center of the room with the amulet glowing red on his chest. Two demons had their hands on his chest and Spike was screaming in pain.

Angel and Cordelia went for the shadowy figures standing behind Spike, which left Logan and Veronica to defend the doors, keeping anything from leaving and attacking the magic trio.

It was hard to concentrate on anything but the fighting, but Logan found Veronica stopping suddenly and putting her hand to her head and then he fought harder to defend her. It wasn’t as if she was in pain, it was as if she was struggling to see beyond her own mind.

A voice rose above the cacophony, shrill and defiant, echoed by deeper and more growling tones in the shadows. Somewhere a goat let out a painful bleat and then was silenced.

“Hic nos introire. Ipsi aperimus portas. Os aperitur via haud ambigue sollicitari. Ascendunt ex inferno comburet iustos. Iterum tenebris trahi possumus.”

“I really should have studied Latin in school,” Logan mumbled to himself, dropping to his knees and spinning away from a sword thrust.

The building shook again and the cloud above them began to vibrate, pulsing brighter and then darker, brighter and then darker.

Spike screamed again.

Behind Logan the doors now framed three figures, white fire emanating from their fingertips. Logan frowned in confusion. It was Mac, Wesley, and Tara, but this didn’t look like normal magic.

Mac stood in the middle, still holding her notebook and it appeared to be the source of the white fire, which threaded from her to Tara and Wesley on either side.

Logan stopped fighting for a second to stare. The three of them walked forward, apparently still protected by Mac’s invisible wall, until they reached the center of the room, just in front of the circle holding Spike.

Veronica started forward.

***

As soon as Veronica saw Mac, Wesley, and Tara, her vision cleared and everything clicked into place in her mind. This was the version of the future she had been waiting for. Nothing else really mattered because now the plan she had concocted could take place, no matter the detours it might have taken to get here.

She grinned and moved forward behind the three magic users. They stopped in front of the circle and then Wesley and Tara moved around it, stopping so they formed a triangle surrounding the circle. The white fire that connected them glowed.

The cloud above became almost agitated, as if the sentience controlling it knew what was about to happen. Veronica knew she had to move fast so she ran to where Buffy was tackling two of the hooded creatures of which there appeared to be a limitless supply.

“We have to go now,” she said, grabbing Buffy’s hand and pulling her behind her past Mac and into the circle.

As soon as they were inside, the white fire sprang up into a visible wall, locking them in the circle with Spike. The darkness above them sprang down, shrouding the entire room, and any glimpse of their allies was lost apart from Mac. Her face looked tense, her shoulders clenched as she typed.

“Hurry,” she gritted out. “This thing is stronger than anything I’ve ever faced and even the collective power of the Internet will give way eventually.”

There were two demons still holding Spike down, their hands on his naked, blood-splattered chest.

Buffy tapped one on the shoulder.

“That’s my undead boyfriend and I’d like you to get your hands off him,” she said, smiling before swinging her axe, sinking it deep into his chest and then yanking it back out.

The demon fell but the other one sprang at her and she had to fall back for room.

Veronica turned to focus on Spike who had slumped down now that he’d been released. His wrists were manacled and bloody from where he’d strained against them. When she looked at them she knew they were magically built and reinforced and there was no way she could get them off.

He looked blearily at her, his eyes somehow focused on some internal struggle. The amulet glowed dully on his chest, a reddish tint, but not the deep red it had been while the demons were holding him.

“Spike,” she whispered softly. “Can you hear me?”

“Bit busy, luv,” he said wearily, his voice more of a reflex than an interaction.

Veronica tried to concentrate, but the noise of Buffy’s fight and the white glare of the magic and the somehow tangible pressure of the darkness above was bearing down on her. At this point, she didn’t know what to do exactly. The whole point of her magic plan was to disrupt the ritual and that’s exactly what was happening, but how to save Spike once he was a part of it, she didn’t know. 

If Spike used the amulet in the new way it had been twisted into by the ritual, he’d open a new Hellmouth. If he used it to try and close it, he could burn up like before. The amulet was supposedly indestructible. She couldn’t see past this moment, she just didn’t know how. Everything was so new and she couldn’t see how to save him.

“Psst, Veronica,” said Lilly. Veronica turned. Lilly crouched near Spike, inspecting his neck. “He doesn’t look so good.”

“Lilly, what do I do?” asked Veronica.

Lilly cocked her head and frowned.

“You’re the fabulous Veronica Mars, you think of something.”

“Lilly, I need your help. I don’t know how to see a good future coming out of this.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be so obsessed with the future,” said Lilly and then she was gone, her image fading.

“What the hell does inner me Lilly mean by that?” asked Veronica.

She paced for a second, passing by where Tara and Wesley were holding their spots. Wesley’s nostrils were bleeding and Tara was hunched over like she was holding the world. Mac’s notebook was smoking and she had sunk to the ground.  
More than one life was in the balance here.

Veronica ran back over everything she knew about the amulet. If Spike was here, he was supposed to be able to control it, since he had imprinted on it, but Spike was lost inside himself at the moment. What could jog that out of him? Veronica smiled upon an image she’d seen in a cave, in the not so distant past.

There was a grunt behind her and Buffy finally felled her opponent and then staggered back.

“Is he okay?” she asked Veronica, laboring to stand up.

Veronica reached down and gave her a hand and then pulled her toward Spike.

“You tell me,” she said and then shoved Buffy in front of Spike, weaving their hands together.

***

Sparks ignited instantly, a flame rushing to cover Buffy and Spike’s joined hands. Spike’s head perked up and his eyes lost the look of despair he’d been wearing. Buffy gasped at the shock of energy surrounding them.

“Buffy,” said Spike, his voice ragged.

“What?” she asked.

“I’d like to stop wearing this amulet,” he said.

“It’s okay by me,” she said. Spike shook his head and the amulet stopped glowing red. White fire glinted in its heart and she looked at him, worried. “Will it burn?” she asked.

Spike shrugged and then appeared to concentrate. The fire consuming their hands ran down to the manacles and they burned, glowing brightly before he snapped them, standing up and bringing Buffy up with him.

“Listen up,” said Spike, and his voice somehow rang through the room and the sounds of fighting. “Spike is officially closed for business. I won’t be anybody’s sodding plaything. You can take your Hellmouths and your Higher Purposes and shove them because the only thing I plan on doing with my life is whatever the bloody hell the Slayer wants.”

Buffy almost laughed as she watched, her hands tightly entwined in his, the flames surrounding, but not hurting her.

Spike took their joined hands and grasped the amulet, holding it out and the light shot up into the air, high above the fire of Mac’s circle and straight into the darkness. There was a screeching sound and the darkness swirled madly. Buffy watched the room lighten, the candles behaving normally again. Demons fled and lawyers ran and she saw Lilah pick something off the ground and disappear into the shadows. The fierce glow surrounding Cordelia began to pierce through the dark of the room, illuminating it along with the candles and the white fire of Mac’s circle. The cloud above whirled and then suddenly stopped, seeming to not be as thick as it had been before. Then the darkness vanished and Buffy blinked because the light from the amulet was still so strong.

Behind her Mac, Tara, and Wesley collapsed as one, the energy link between them broken. Angel and Cordelia rushed to Wesley while Veronica knelt by Mac and Logan ran forward to help Tara. Buffy only had eyes for Spike who brought the amulet down and released her hands.

“Spike, what are you doing?” she asked, sudden fear overwhelming her. Was she about to lose him again?

“Trust me, love,” he said. 

Her hands were flame free but his own were still burning. He slowly pulled the amulet over his head with one hand and the light instantly began to fade as did the flames. Before they were gone he held his burning hand over the jewel and focused the flames on it.

There was a white hot explosion of heat and Buffy staggered back before rushing forward in alarm.

“Spike!” she yelled.

He stood there in the middle of the circle, a blackened and charred chain in his hand, his own hands raw and red.

“Feel a bit sick,” he said and keeled over.

She ran to him and it was no good checking his pulse to see if he was alive, but at least he wasn’t dust.

“You’re not allowed to die,” she said. “Only one death each per relationship, that’s the rule.”

“You never follow the rules,” he said faintly and she grinned.

“Thankfully neither do you,” she said and kissed him.


	14. Chapter 14

Everything was a bit of a blur after Spike destroyed the amulet. They exited through the eerily empty Wolfram and Hart building.

“Guess they told everyone to take a sick day,” said Logan.

Veronica put her hand in his and inspected the cut on his neck.

“That doesn’t look too bad,” she said.

“I’m a heavy bleeder,” he said. “You know that.”

“I do,” she said wryly.

They had to support Mac, Wesley, and Tara, who were barely able to walk. Tara still hadn’t said anything and Veronica suspected that even though the main energy boost had come from Mac’s harnessing of online magic, Tara had borne the brunt of the work of the actual spellcasting and spell-sustaining. The three of them amazed her.

Once outside of Wolfram and Hart, Cordelia put two fingers in her mouth and whistled.

A cab pulled up to the curb and Cordelia unceremoniously pushed Tara, Wesley, Mac, and Spike inside, giving the driver the Hyperion address.

“What?” she said, after everyone looked at her. “The vampires won’t still be at the hotel after what just happened and I’ll charge it as an evil-fighting expense.”

“You are an interesting woman,” said Buffy finally, turning to walk.

“I grow on people,” said Cordelia, linking her arm in Angel’s and following.

Veronica couldn’t help but agree. She walked fast to catch up with them.

“That was some light show in there,” she said. “Actually, back at the hotel was better.”

“I used up most of my flash there,” said Cordelia, shrugging. “But it’s not like I could cure the Senior Partners of evil anyway. They’re happier evil, I think.”

“We probably owe you our lives,” said Logan. “I mean, once they took Spike, if you hadn’t driven the darkness back…”

“We’d all be vampire munchies, yadda yadda,” said Cordelia. “It’s my gift and I use it.” She nudged Veronica with her elbow. “Somebody else has been using her gifts.”

Veronica smiled, feeling an odd kinship with the woman beside her.

“It is a gift,” she said, feeling it fully. “I can’t predict the lottery or the weather, but I can…know things. Definitely something a PI would find valuable.”

“All it took was a little apocalypse,” said Cordelia. She delinked her arm from Angel’s and slowed down a bit, shoving Logan a bit ahead of them, quelling their confusion with a look. “Something tells me not our last, but I guess you can handle that, right?”

“I can handle a lot more than I thought I could,” said Veronica, arching an eyebrow.

“We all can,” said Cordelia. “Here’s a tip from me to you, beamed straight into my head from the Powers.”

“A vision?” Veronica queried.

“Yup.” Cordelia nodded. “I saw you working at your office, Logan picking you up after work.” She paused like there was more, but then didn’t continue.

“What do you think it means?” asked Veronica.

“That the future is up to you to create,” said Cordelia. “Duh.”

“Any other advice?” asked Veronica, rolling her eyes.

“You got this,” said Cordelia after a minute. “But I’m only a phone call away if something’s too big for your head.”

“I…appreciate that,” said Veronica, a strange new affection blooming inside of her. There was really nothing to connect them apart from a shared vision of the future, but somehow that was enough to make Cordelia reach out and Veronica was grateful. “I’ll put you on speed dial.”

“Life goal met,” said Cordelia sarcastically, but not meanly. Veronica could tell that knowing the difference between the two was probably an important part of being Cordelia's friend.

There wasn’t too much to do once they got back to the Hyperion, the vampires indeed having dispersed. Cordelia immediately set about transporting a very weak Wesley home and badgering Angel to get patched up.

Everyone who needed it received immediate medical care. Tara and Mac were suffering from sheer exhaustion. Out of all of them Spike had been wounded the most but after guzzling three bags of blood he appeared to be swiftly on the mend, if still tired and cranky. Logan was limping, Veronica had discovered a new strain on her wrist, and Buffy had multiple cuts and bruises, so they made the decision they should stay for another day or so before making the trip back to Neptune.

There were leftovers they ate in a post-apocalypse haze, but other than Mac and Tara who had both fallen asleep, everyone else appeared to be too wired up to sleep.

Angel had disappeared and Cordelia wasn’t back from taking care of Wesley, so Buffy, Logan, and Veronica went out into the garden.

Veronica sat down on the bench and leaned against Logan’s arm. She was very tired, but the idea of sleep didn’t really appeal. What she wanted was to be here, with these people, resting in the knowledge that they were safe.

***

Spike leaned up against the wall and watched Buffy, Veronica, and Logan. They were all clearly about to drop, but no one made any mention of going to bed. He smiled slightly, feeling a bit settled inside. He’d missed this, or at least some part of him had known he would miss it. It still felt like yesterday to him that they were all sitting around 1630 Revello Drive complaining about the sudden influx of teenage girls, but now here they all were, five years later, successful and happy people. 

He was proud his sacrifice had made that happen, but he was even happier that he got to be here now with them. The lingering questions and lack of surety about who he was had severely lessened when he’d destroyed the amulet. It wasn’t that the amulet itself was holding any kind of power over him, but he felt closure now that he hadn’t felt before. He was ready to be a souled vampire, free to take on the world and to be in love, aware of the guilt of his past but not about to let it ruin his future.

The Powers had given him a gift, a chance to be resurrected with his friends and family instead of burning up again in a ritual that would have destroyed his original sacrifice. He’d take it, but he wasn’t about to open up any kind of detective agency or take up drawing. He wasn’t that kind of man, before or after the soul.

He sauntered toward Buffy and slung an arm around her shoulder.

“Witches are resting comfortably, moved them to their rooms.”

“That was very sweet,” said Veronica. “Especially since they nearly collapsed saving your ass.”

“Wouldn’t have needed to have my ass saved if someone hadn’t dreamt me back to life there, Private Eye,” he said.

She laughed and shook her head.

“Not even going to dignify that one.”

There was a vibrating sound and Buffy guiltily pulled her cell phone out of her pocket.

“It’s Dawn,” she said. “I’ve got a lot of sisterly explaining to do.”

“Hopefully she’ll go easy on you,” said Logan.

Buffy shot him a look and then walked away, sticking her phone to her ear.

“Hi, Dawn, sorry, listen…”

Spike watched her go fondly and then turned to the other two.

“When I talked to the Bit, she was good,” he said. “Everyone’s moved on to great bloody heights, it would seem.”

“Yeah,” said Veronica, “I don’t know about that. Life…moves on though. Sometimes it lets you stop and have something catch up,” she finished, gesturing toward him.

“Would be nice not to have to run,” said Spike. “It’s a lot to catch up to. The whelp and Demon Girl got a new rugrat, the Bit’s finishing up college, and the two of you are hitched.”

“Yeah,” said Logan. “We’re very responsible grownups.”

“Bully for you,” said Spike. “Now I just gotta figure out where to go from here.”

“Somehow I think it will involve a certain Slayer,” said Logan.

“Bloody right,” said Spike. “Cause she still loves me.” He said it proudly.

“She did all right for herself,” said Veronica. “She’s always strong, but you know…there’s just something about having the right fit.” She glanced at Logan. “That’s partly how I knew in the circle that Buffy could reach you. I remembered her bringing you back to yourself when you came out of the amulet, but I also knew if it were me in there with the amulet around my neck, Logan could pull me out just by being with me.”

“I’m blushing all over,” Logan said, dropping a kiss on her shoulder.

“Wish I could have been at your wedding,” said Spike suddenly. “Stupid for me to have worn a bloody tux for Xander, but not even get to see yours.”

“Well,” said Logan, pulling his phone out of his pocket and flipping through some of the pictures. “You can see some of it here.” Spike took the phone and couldn’t make heads or tails out of moving through the photos. Logan laughed and took the phone back. “How about we just show you the video when we go back home?”

“All right,” said Spike. “I’m glad you could suss life out together, is all.”

“So are we,” said Veronica. “We’ve got more sussing out to do, I’m sure.”

“Merry old life,” said Spike.

Buffy wandered back into their circle, shoving her phone in her pocket and scooting down next to Spike.

“Sorry about that. Dawn was very insistent on getting all battle details and telling me question by question her triumphs on her tests. It made me flashback to high school.”

“Parent night?” asked Spike.

She smiled at him and then frowned.

“You upset my mother.”

“Well, she hit me with an axe!” he said.

“Old patterns never die,” said Logan.

“Got that right,” said Spike grumpily. “Now we can do that till we’re blue in the face,” he said. “No more amulet, no more Spike hunting.”

“Unless they’re out for revenge,” said Veronica. “I mean, it’s not like we destroyed Wolfram and Hart. That was a retreat, not a rout.”

“Wolfram and Hart is my problem,” said Angel, melting out of the shadows. “They won’t be bothering you anymore.”

“What makes you so sure?” asked Buffy.

“I might have paid Lilah a little visit,” he said sheepishly. “Besides, it will take them a while to regroup and this particular bunch doesn’t stray too far from LA.”

“Keep all the bloody fun to yourself as per usual,” said Spike.

“Sure, I’ll engage the evil lawyers so you can go off and be happy in your life, William,” said Angel. “You’re welcome.”

“We’ll all just be a little more careful from now on,” said Veronica. “But their main objective was destroyed and I showed Cordelia how to keep tabs with the surveillance we put up. With that and her visions I’m sure you’ll be one step ahead of them.”

“We’ll keep you posted,” said Angel. He paused and then nodded at her. “It was a good plan.”

“Thank you,” said Veronica, rather graciously, Spike thought.

A slight snore interrupted then and Spike saw that Logan had fallen asleep. Not a bad idea - he could do with some kip himself.

“All votes for bed?” asked Buffy.

“Aye,” said Veronica, then shuddered. “Sorry, I don’t do pirate talk…ever.”

Spike chuckled and then they all headed up to bed. He wanted to talk to Buffy or snog her senseless, but he was wearing down pretty fast and he could tell she was exhausted. Luckily, they had the rest of their lives for such things and he gladly dropped into bed beside her, falling asleep almost immediately.

In the morning, there were the usual goodbyes to make.

Wesley came by with a newly arrived Fred and Gunn to tell them goodbye. Buffy hugged him warmly.

“Thank you for your help,” she said. 

Wesley blushed and nodded stiffly. He was a bit more animated while saying goodbye to Mac and Tara and Spike decided he would have to tease them all about becoming a magic crime fighting team. Doing magic like that did tend to bond people, he gathered.

Cordelia hugged them all and said something in Veronica’s ear Spike didn’t catch but Veronica looked pleased.

Angel shook Veronica’s hand and mentioned something about working together again and Spike rolled his eyes.

“Just admit she’s a better detective than you, Gramps,” he said.

“Spike,” Angel said, looking him in the eye. Spike froze a little bit because there was so much behind that name, the memory and guilt of a lifetime. It all flashed between them, too much to even put into thought, but a little bit more of Spike as he was now seemed to fall into place and he doubted he’d be going insane again any time soon. Unless he had to stay around Angel for much longer. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?”

Spike grinned.

“Anywhere but here.”

He couldn’t help it; he pulled Buffy closer and walked out of the hotel. Buffy simply huffed a little and walked with him.

They walked to Logan’s car and Spike found himself wishing he could be the one driving them home. He hoped his DeSoto was okay. He was going to have to track it down now, having lent it to Clem in the evacuation of Sunnydale before the final battle.

“You ready to go home?” asked Buffy.

He nodded.

“Lead the way, love.”

***

It was a long drive home. Logan put on some mellow music and tried his best not to fall asleep, but at this point that was pretty much all he wanted to do. He wasn’t even the one who had done very much. His part in this apocalypse had been relegated to snarky comments and a little bit of fighting, which he was honestly just fine with. Veronica had been the lynch pin that held it all together, Spike had overcome a powerful artifact, and Buffy had killed so many things he couldn’t even keep track of them all.

So he drove them home and kept himself from yawning too much, just thankful it appeared to be over. Veronica was snuggled up against the window, snoozing, and he glanced over at her whenever he thought he could get away with it. She’d spent the first portion of the ride on the phone with her dad and doing simultaneous texting with Wallace, but she’d fallen asleep now and he couldn’t think of anyone who deserved rest more.

There was a moment when he pulled in the drive and then Mac pulled up behind him when they all got out and stared at each other for a while in the usual post-apocalypse stupor. 

“I really have to get home,” Tara finally said. “I have people in my care.”

“Just make sure you take care of you,” said Logan seriously. 

“I’m not really that self-sacrificing,” said Tara, giving him a quick hug. “I promise I’m on my way home to bed.”

“I gotta run as well,” said Mac. “I take any more vacation and I won’t have a job.”

“You know perfectly well Mars Investigation is always open to helping poor wayward technopagans in need,” said Veronica.

“Yeah, well, not sure you can afford me,” said Mac, who spent so much time doing pro-bono work for Veronica, Logan was fairly sure even he could never repay her as it was.

“Get home,” said Veronica.

Tara turned to Buffy and hugged her. 

“You’re not leaving just yet?” she asked.

Buffy smiled without any anxiety or doubt as far as Logan could make out.

“Naw, Veronica and Logan aren’t kicking me out yet, and we have got some planning to do.” She squeezed Spike’s hand and he winked at her.

“Then I will make sure we have some real time together before you leave,” said Tara. She hugged Spike next and there were tears in her eyes. “I think it’s only just coming home to me that you’re really back,” she said.

“Never get rid of me, Glinda,” said Spike, hugging her tightly. “Back for good.”

“Then all is well,” said Tara. “I can’t wait to talk more.”

“Me too,” he said.

Once the girls had left, they toted in the luggage they hadn’t really used and the weapons they had and stood around in the hall for a moment.

“I literally have no idea what to do next,” said Buffy. “I am idea-less, bereft of the slightest bit of inspiration.”

“Join the club,” said Logan. “I am however going to take Veronica into our bedroom and the two of you can do whatever you like. Food’s in the kitchen, laundry’s down the hall, car’s in the garage, bed’s in your bedroom. We’ll see you in a few days.”

“Not literally,” said Veronica, before Logan dragged her down the hallway and into their bedroom and closed and locked the door. She sat on the bed and primly crossed her legs. “Just what exactly do you think you’re doing, Echolls?”

“Whatever the hell we want,” he said. He walked over to her, bent down, and kissed her lips. “You and I are finally finally alone and free from the good fight.”

She leaned back and pulled him down with her and he spent a few moments kissing his wife before rolling to the side and tucking her against him, his chin against the top of her head.

“That does sound like a very good idea,” she said after a moment or two. “In fact, I have an idea or two of my own.”

“Are they actually ideas from my head that you plucked out?” he inquired without any real intensity.

“It doesn’t work like that, silly,” said Veronica, playing with his jacket lapel. “I can’t read your thoughts, but perhaps I might know your decisions.”

“What did I just decide to do?” he asked.

“Ask me that question,” she said, smirking at him.

He kissed her again and lost himself for a moment or two.

“Does it feel all right?” he asked. “You were pretty amazing out there, my little psychic.”

“I am quite frequently,” she said. “I’ve just added a new skill to my repertoire.”

“And a beautiful little repertoire it is,” he said.

“I think there’s still room for improvement,” she said. “I mean, from what Cordelia told me I’m pretty sure I’m on my own, the Powers aren’t manipulating anything in my head or sending me on missions or anything like that. It’s just that when I really need to now, I can figure things out or know when they happen. I’ll have to do some more research and experiment.”

“I see days as a guinea pig in my near future,” said Logan, teasingly. “Do you think it’s catching?”

She play-bit at his throat and he laughed.

“Does it bother you?” she asked. “I mean, I was a most aggressive investigator before this.”

“I trust you have the good sense not to root out things that aren’t there,” said Logan. 

“That’s a dangerous play,” she said.

“I’m a gambler, always have been,” he said. “But if this keeps you safer, lets you dodge the danger you court, then I’m all for it.”

“I thought you’d get around to that angle, you big worrier,” said Veronica.

“Like a little old maid,” said Logan. “I’m proud of you and I’m with you all the way, Mars.”

“You’d better be, I have a binding marriage certificate that says so,” said Veronica.

Logan kissed her again and then let his mind wander. He was content, not even planning on bringing up the kids sales pitch. Veronica had told him what she wanted and he’d seen the evidence of her gift in LA. If he was going to be even slightly the husband he’d promised to be to her and the man he’d promised himself he’d be, then he could afford to wait.

Just having her, having Spike back in their lives, seeing Buffy so ecstatic, saving the world, knowing he had everything he needed, he could wait a bit for everything he wanted. Until then, there were the moments like this and he wouldn’t trade all the kids in the world for them.

***

Buffy stared after Logan and Veronica with a bemused look on her face. When she looked back at Spike he was smirking at her.

“What are you looking at?” she asked. 

“The Slayer in all her glory,” he said.

She laughed and led the way down to what was their bedroom for the moment.

“I’m not the only Slayer anymore,” she said. She stopped and then frowned for a second. “You missed that, didn’t you?”

“Guess I did,” he said, looking slightly confused.

“No,” she said, “I mean, I am not the only Slayer anymore. For five years I haven’t had that burden. But you’ve been dead and you haven’t seen the world the way it is now. You died for that world and you don’t even know what you did for me.”

“Getting a bit lost here, love.”

Buffy couldn’t believe the ridiculous and inane epiphany she’d just had. 

“Spike, I’m free,” she said. “The day I watched Sunnydale sink into the ground I was free and I could go anywhere and do anything. I was grieving and I spent a long time figuring out who I was and what I wanted, but I’ve been content. The only thing I was missing was someone to share it with.”

“That’s a cliché line,” he said.

“Isn’t it great?” said Buffy. “I get to be cliché. I don’t have to save the world, unless I want to. I can call in back up from forty different countries. I’m semi-retired. I have a trust fund courtesy of our current host. I…have been so focused since you got back on how I’d lost you that I forgot about what I gained when I did.”

“Right…”

“Not that losing you was good,” she hastened to say. “No, losing you was of the bad, the baddest, totally bad. But it showed me who I could be and I am that person and now…now I get to have that and you. Who’s getting it all made up to her? This gal in these boots, that’s who.”

Spike watched her with wariness and amusement in his eyes.

“Never seen you so free, love,” he said. “It’s a bit barmy really.”

“So what do you want?” she asked. “I mean, I get it, I know exactly what to do and who to do it with, but you’ve got a lot of catching up to do. What’s next?”

“I want what I’ve always wanted, Buffy,” he said. “I wanna be with you.”

“Done,” she said, catching a hold of his hand and yanking him toward her. “But what else?”

“Wanna see the Bit,” he admitted, running his hand over her arm.

“On the next plane,” she said. “What else?”

“Wouldn’t mind catching up with the rest of the gang,” he said somewhat reluctantly.

“Xander will be thrilled,” she said, stepping even closer. “And?”

“Dunno,” he said. “It’s been go and go since I got back, this ruddy soul mucking with my head. Still gonna take some time to suss everything out. You with me until I do?”

“Till my dying day,” she said. “Again.”

“You say that too often,” he said.

She shrugged.

“A girl dies a couple of times, she stops sweating it. How about you? You’re on death number two yourself.”

“Guess so,” he said, raising his hand to touch her hair almost unconsciously. “It’s a bit rough in here. Think I’m finally one man though; doubt I’ll go starkers and get sectioned any time soon.”

“Which man?” she asked.

“Which one do you want?” he asked, not in an insecure way, but curiously.

She smiled.

“Whichever man you are is the one I want,” she said. “I fell in love with the demon, but I’ve seen who the man can become and they’re really not that different.”

“Poor William,” said Spike, but he grinned and captured her lips. “So does this mean you want me to live with you in Cleveland of all hellholes?”

“Hmm,” she said. “Sure, but I’ve been thinking. I know an overzealous Slayer who’s ripe for command and I’m thinking it’s time you revisit the world with a brand new perspective.”

“It takes a lot of cattle boats and redeye flights when you go globetrotting with me, pet,” he warned, his smile showing how much he actually liked the idea.

“I’ll take you any way I can,” she said. “I’m never letting you go again.”

“Don’t want to be let go of,” he said, kissing her.

She had had a whole speech planned about how he could finally find himself while revisiting everything he’d seen before, meeting old friends, fighting the good fight, and learning about the soul, but she quickly discovered anew that with Spike, words were often unnecessary. They could say a thousand things to each other with just a look. So often they’d been on the wrong page, but before he’d died, and now that he’d come back, they were falling into the synchronicity that she’d longed for and loved and missed. 

It was a little bit like coming home, finding her renewed purpose in equality and strength and respect and partnership. She’d survived without him, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t choose him every time if she could.

He kissed her until she wanted to tear his clothes off and saw no reason not to follow through on that desire. Feeling him so close again, that familiarity of his body and touch, perhaps tempered with a bit more gentleness and respect and consideration, she didn’t mind the difference; she was too lost in the miracle to notice anything but the benefits.

He gave her back his life, something he’d offered time and time again and she was completely confident in her choice to take it and keep it safe. The fears that had risen once she’d known Spike was coming back were laid to rest completely and she focused on showing him how much she loved him in all the ways she knew how.


	15. Epilogue

_Veronica stood in front of Neptune High School. Not her favorite place to be but often a recurring location in her dreams. She’d often wondered what that meant about her psyche and she wondered even more now that she knew what an unusual place her psyche was._

_“It’s just a place, Veronica. It’s an anchoring spot. You’re more alert here, on your guard. It’s where you find information, where you hide information, where you seek and where you listen.”_

_Veronica knew that voice. Lilly was there, still in her cheerleading uniform._

_“Are you ever going to grow out of that?” she asked, gesturing to the outfit._

_“You tell me,” said Lilly, smirking. She wandered over to her memorial fountain and idly ran her hand over the stone. “It’s all about you, Veronica.”_

_“Something even I don’t want to probe too deeply into,” said Veronica. “So, what’s next, some great mission or danger?”_

_“Some would say,” said Lilly. “You do know that things aren’t always clear cut and that you’ve got a long way to go, right?”_

_“I do,” said Veronica, nodding. “I mean, it’s great having dreams and talking to you and everything, but trying to know things as they were happening was really hard and if this had been a television show, blood would have been dripping out of my nose.”_

_“Still might,” said Lilly cheerfully._

_“Great. So, I’m going to carefully expand my mind and experiment with my potential. Maybe not try so hard to know things, just let them happen when they need to. Sound good?” Veronica asked._

_“What would I know?” said Lilly. “Seriously, though, I’ve always admired your ability to think before acting. Would’ve been a handy skill for me to have.”_

_“Lilly,” said Veronica, not really knowing how to respond to that._

_Lilly waved her hand._

_“Past Lilly, past Lilly. Now we’re on to future Veronica.”_

_“What does that mean?” asked Veronica warily._

_Lilly laughed and took Veronica by the hand, leading her into the school. But once they were inside they weren’t inside Neptune High. It was a hospital. Lilly led her through the corridors, twisting and turning until Veronica was highly confused._

_They stopped in front of a glass window and Veronica’s heart tightened when she saw that inside was the maternity ward with the glass containers holding their tiny bundles of babies. It was odd, but as much as she’d pushed aside her desires and decisions about a baby, there had always been a little niggling want in the back of her mind, and not just because she knew how much Logan wanted one._

_Lilly smiled knowingly._

_“Veronica Mars, you’re a marshmallow.”_

_“Does this mean?” Veronica started to ask._

_Lilly grabbed her hand again and led her into the room, stopping at the bassinet by the door._

_Inside was a baby girl, swaddled in blankets, just waking up._

_“May I present the future?” said Lilly, gesturing grandly._

***

Veronica woke up and smiled, no grinned. Concerns, doubts, fears, worries, all gone. Not just because she knew the future. No, just because she knew.

She jabbed at Logan until he blinked blearily up at her.

“Is the world ending again?” he groaned.

“Lilly says we can have a baby now,” she said wickedly and watched him fully process that.

It took a while but after a moment of confused and slightly horrified staring he sat up and with a grin just as wicked as hers, pounced on her.

“Well, I’ve never been one to deny Lilly; let’s get to it.”


End file.
